John Was Leaving

I feel like I've never seen him before. This is a completely new person. I take a couple steps and sit down beside him. I can't keep my eyes off of the rhythmic motions. I've watched myself jerk off, but I've never seen another live person do it. I've never even seen another person's nakedness before.

I hold my cock and tenderly begin to rub my hand up and down. Tenderly, slowly.

He watches the porn raptly. He probably wants to be in the porn, fucking that girl. I don't know what to say or what to do. So I masturbate.

When the man on the TV finally cums, spraying the girl's face (as most porns seem to end these days), John looks over at me. He doesn't say anything but he watches me. He watches me jerk my cock very hesitantly. He lets go of his own member and raises it to my face. He slides his hand along my face, cupping my cheek, moving past my ear and curling around the back. Gently he pulls my head toward him, down, towards his cock. I figure out what he's doing as soon as my mouth opens and a penis is inserted. I feel the ridges and the veins with my tongue. I taste the precum sticking sweetly, penis slithering in my mouth. I'm sucking my best friend's cock. John's cock.

In my lap, John's hand is groping along my thigh, aiming for my cock, hopefully. To have my own dick jerked by someone other than mine, how absolutely divine. His fingers wrap around the shaft and his thumb circles on my head, swirling the juice around.

"Ugh," I snort, mouth full.

"Sure," John says.

I move my head back up, the dickhead popping out of my mouth, a string of saliva and precum dangling from my mouth, dripping towards his cock. I'm about to say something, but John pushes on my head again, filling my mouth with warm flesh.

My nipples are hard and I can feel everything in my body. I've never been more aware of the sensations happening. I can feel the ridges of the carpet digging into my ass. I can feel a slight breeze from the kitchen blowing over my shoulder. I can taste and smell everything.

It makes me want more.

I try to take more dick into me. I try to relax my throat like I've seen in porn. John – I want more of you.

His sparse brown pubic hair tickles at my nose. I pause and breathe in deeply, to smell him.

Everything in my body tenses while John skillfully manipulates my penis. I know this feeling. I gasp, almost choking on him, and there's a pause. The orgasm rips through my muscles and cum explodes from my lap. Semen slaps onto John's arm and shoulder. He laughs.

"Sure," he mutters.

He places a hand underneath my chin and pulls me off of his cock. He looks into my eyes and smiles.

"Did that feel good?"

"Ha. Yeah."

"Sure it did. You came on me, man."

"Sorry about that."

"Don't worry. It kind of turns me on."

"I'm not – uh – I'm."

"Shut up." He stands up, his cock proud and erect, cum sliding down his side. "Get up and go to the couch."

"What?"

"Get up and go to the couch. I want to cum."

I slowly stand, my cock deflating a little, and I step to the sofa.

"Turn around."

I do so. My cock tenses.

"Bend over."

I turn around and say, "Uh, no, I – no"

"Yes. Bend over."

Turning back to the couch, I put my hands up and bend over. I place my hands on the sofa seat and arch my back a little, my ass in the air, my legs spread, my cock hanging tightly between my legs.

He reaches between my legs and touches the slipperly member. He puts another hand on my cheek and pulls it aside. He places his thumb against my asshole and circles my bud. He says, "This is what I want."

He leans into my ass and I feel something warm on my hole. He's licking my anus. He circles his tongue, in wide swirling motions, going from hole to cheek to my sack. He rubs his tongue up and down my hole. He tenses up his tongue and pushes against my entrance. I open up and he slides in. It's quite a tight fit. I don't know if I want this. What am I thinking? I want John so bad.

I'm groaning as John eats out my ass and beats me off.

He lets go suddenly and says, "I'm going to fill you up."

"I lo – I – please."

He holds onto his cock and aims it right at me. He touches the head to my anus and swirls it around a little, getting some of the saliva and the precum all over. He presses it on my ass and pushes. I spread my legs a little better, to make it easier. The cock slowly slides into my ass. He moans.

"Fuck, you're so tight."

"Unnhh," is my reply.

He pushes his cock to the hilt. I feel so full, so connected. He takes his cock out slowly just as soon as I get this feeling. He pushes it back in a little bit faster, as my ass gets used to this. He keeps going in and out and back in again a little faster each time, until he's actually fucking me.

John is getting more and more loud. He's really enjoying himself. He keeps telling me that I'm so tight. His hands, griping at my hips, are doing as much of the work as his hips are. He's pulling me, pounding me against his cock, filling me up and taking it away just as quickly.

The feeling is incredible. My hole stretches and contracts as his member burrows its way into my body. Feeling the heat inside me. Hearing the sounds of wet slippery sliding. Smelling his sweat sweet. I close my eyes, squeeze them tight. It's... painful, searing sore. But wonderful, to be with John, for John to be a part of me. Is this what being connected feels like? Is this the culmination of everything we've ever done? Is this the climax?

He says, "I'm going to fuckin' cum!"

Or just the beginning?

"Take it out," I shout.

"What?"

"I want you to cum on me."

"Unnh, too late," he says.

He tenses up and then pulls his cock out. He says, "Quick, fucking turn around."

I whip off the couch quickly, my ass hot and wet, and I fall onto the carpet. I think John may have cum a little in my ass.

I grab a hold of John's cock and starts jerking it quickly. He makes a sharp noise and then I aim his cock at my face. A rope of white shoots out slapping against my face. It's hot and slimy. Another tendril snakes out, falling on my hair and my eye. More cum pours out all over my arm and hand, dripping onto my chest. I stroke his cock more, making the cum all frothy and he says that there's no more. He opens his eyes, breathing quite heavily and chuckles. "You're covered in cum."

"Thanks," I say, mutely.

"Let's go take a shower."

He helps me to my feet and I feel my upper thigh is wet. I turn around and see a wet spot right on the carpet.

"I guess I came in your ass some."

"Yeah," I chuckle a little, not meaning it. I feel empty somewhat.

He places his hand between my cheeks and feels my cummy ass. He slides a finger in easily and pulls it out. He raises his arm and brings it to my mouth. I take his finger, sucking on his cum. He pulls the finger out and says, "Come on."

We walk naked, holding hands to the shower. He opens the bathroom door and grabs some towels. I turn on the water and step into the tub. He places the towels on the toilet and follows me into the shower. He jerks the curtain close and I wrap my arms around him.

He places his arms around me and we hug, there in the shower, beneath the beating flow of the hot water, rinsing our cum off and into the drain. Everything is pouring into the drain. Everything, washing away, gone forever.

He whispers in my ear, "Hey. Hey. Are you okay?"

I take my head off of his shoulder and look into his eyes. We both lean into it and our lips touch. It's hesitant at first, but then he presses more firmly against me. I feel his cock stir down where it touches my cock. His lips open, his tongue presses against my teeth. I open my mouth and let his tongue enter, snaking and slithering all along my tongue and teeth. It's very – it's very nice. This is the first time we've ever kissed. Not that this should be a surprise; fifteen minutes ago I was a virgin. I just sucked my first cock and had my first fuck. And it couldn't have been any better, and it couldn't have been with anybody else. Please tell you're not going anywhere, John. Please tell me you're staying. I love you. We are a family.

"I love you, John," I croak as I break the kiss.

"I figured that, dude." We're still so close that when he talks, his lips brush against mine. "I love you, too."

"You can't leave."

"I have to."

We shampooed and soaped and showered and dried off and laughed without believing it. He led me to the bedroom and we laid down and fell asleep.

I wake up a little later, and it's still night outside. My parents may be home, they may not be home. It doesn't matter. I turn over and I see John lying on his side, with his back to me, sleeping soundly.

It was such a short moment when we were connected. The actual sex lasted maybe ten minutes if that. It wasn't about the release, it wasn't about the cumming. It was being together. It was consummating something beautiful. Crystallizing a bond made stronger by experience and by experimentation.

John rolls over onto his back, the blanket sliding off his muscular body. It's still too hot for covers. A large hand of moonlight covers my floor and bed, making everything glow like a newly pregnant wife. This is the birth of – of something.

I lift my hand gently, slowly, as to not disturb my best friend – my lover. I place my hand on his chest. Beads of sweat, the rise and fall of his chest, the breath flowing over my hand from his nose. I feel the light soft skin of his nipple and I drag my hand down, over his stomach, caressing his ripples and folds of muscle and flesh, the dip of his small navel. I slide my hand over the bump I n his hip, avoiding his long flaccid penis, feeling the curve of his thigh and hip, the beginning of the sparse soft hair on his legs, the pores opened wide from heat and sweat. Moving down the curve of his thigh, feeling the muscles and the tight tendons, the slight plumpness of his cheek.

A tear rolls down my face, stopping at my jaw line.

"I love you so much, John," I whisper.

I drag my hand back to his lap and I slide my hand over his penis, softly griping it, holding onto it. It doesn't respond to my machinations immediately. It begins to rise in my grasp, yielding to my feathery fingers. As his dick rises up to its glory, I begin to rub my thumb in circles over the head while squeezing with my fingers, one at a time. The skin is just so soft, like silk. The hair so light in color and so few. It's beautiful. I'm not crying. I'm not, I swear.

He breathes in sharply and his eyes open. Lifting his head, he watches me jerk his dick and says, "Enjoying yourself?"

I grimace and continue.

"Hey, hey, hey," he says. His pubis slides away from me as he arranges himself in a sitting position. He puts his hand against my face and lifts it up. "Are you okay?"

"No," I mutter. "No I'm not."

"We can always visit."

"It's not the same."

"Dude - "

"No. It's not fair. It's not fair at all. As soon as we – as soon as -"

"I know."

"I love you so much, John. You don't even know. You're my best friend."

He smiles so warmly, I just want to be in him. Not just fucking him, or him fucking me, I want to be a part of him, to feel that smile from the inside, to look out through his eyes at his best friend, his lover. To know such love, to be such a god.

"Think about this," he says, grinning suddenly. "We have all of college, all of our lives. This is just the beginning."