All Comments on 'Kath and Tom Ch. 01'

Well done. Straight up and straight forward. Thank you,

LWlurker

4 stars so far. I generally like the story and the way you have laid it out, BUT it looks like you may slip in a bit more violence. Yes, running the story through a grammar and spell checker, before posting it, would be an added bonus.

4 to 5 stars. a little slow, but a lot of trouble ahead. Is Sue a Bi also?

MC is an insufferable prick. Nobody likes a stupid drunk, and what's it with these MC's who run away? That's a technique that self-published writers on Amazon us to juice the page turns for a bigger Kindle Unlimited payday. In the real world, and especially on this site, it's shitty writing that drags out the plot line and frustrates any reader with an I.Q. above the boiling point of nitrogen.

Well written, excellent start. Part 2 needs more (lots more) information if this will be a reconciliation; right now, on the facts presented, he should dump his wife. Tom working his ass off and being restless at night didn't justify his wife moving out of their bedroom and staying away and cutting off sex for months.

It's not 100% clear at this point that wife fucked the guy with whom she was emailing, sexting and late night phone calling. That said, she certainly was engaged in a long emotional affair that led to her abandonment of her husband's bed and cutting him off from any sex. That alone is more than enough for divorce. But there also may be room for a very difficult effort to reconcile, depending on where this story goes. Great start though and I'm looking forward to Part 2. 5*****

MC is a good man who wont put up with shit, not even from his wife. We need more men like this.

Lazy writers who cannot coherently write plot, believable characters or action rely on stupid writing, such as creating conflict, which is the life blood of all fiction, by having characters who flee, ignore, delete messages and refuse to listen. See, this isolates the character into a comfortable shell where OP can verbalize his feeeeelings. Add to that, getting drunk, puking and crying, and you have a story where 70-80 percent of the writing is just filled. The last 2000 words of this story were reminiscent of a house where nothing is square and the builder tries putty and paint to make it look good. What a shitshow. There's a decent plot here, but the semi-literate moron who wrote this screwed it up. Badly.

Beware -- cuckold coming up next chapter.

For those here who slander the writer, remember how much you paid to read it. I liked it and am looking forward to the next chapter.