by AddToWater
I just cant wait for the next installment to this story...
very well written, with nice lead up...
Only suggestion, next time more detail on what each are doing,touching etc...
Keep up the great job
great story and I can't wait for part 2 if there is one...was a little disappointed that he didn't reveal to her right at the end who he really was, would have made it an interesting twist for someone who was afraid like that...the build-up and detailed description of him being afraid though was excellent and had MY heart pounding in fear, something very hard to do with a story on here...good work and keep it up
Absolutely well done. Not only was the story extremely well written, but its casual tone was very inviting and enjoyable. The sex itself was well written, and needless to say I was both surprised and pleased at the inclusion of the brother.<br><br>The ending was also very fitting given the nature of the story, and it has lots of potential for follow-ups should you choose to continue this particular saga.<br><br>For a first time entry, the story was very impressing, but don't confuse that with being a consolation compliment. Your story is well written, period. Regardless of how new or seasoned of an author you are, I'm going to continue waiting for your work. Well done.
First time writer be damned - it was brilliant,period. Let's have more of these two.
Hold on, wait, I gotta get this hook out of my mouth....
That was great! I absolutely loved it, and laughed out loud several times while reading it.
Just keep it up!
Erotica - sex & imagination: All there!
Critics - get with it: he's bigger, he's better, he left his shorts, he was round two. For goodness sakes, where's the imagination? THEN hope to compare yours with the next intallment!
Have to write more on this couple - then include the rest of the family maybe - things should really start to heat up and a competition between the two younger guys will give some extra demention to the stories - very good start to your erotic writing - keep it up - Jena121
I loved Tom's character. You depict him so well. what he's thinking, how he is confused, horny etc. please please please keep going with this.
Wow ... this hot story builds up nicely to a crashing climax!!! Loved it!
A really cracking start to a promising series - as a first time poster the reader will indulge the hint of vanity in the narrator's performance. But hell it's fantasy so we can all allow ourselves a little indulgence. Otherwise you steer the path between fanatasy and plausibilty with aplomb.
You have made me want to read Ch 2....
mmmmm but my cosin wanted me to fuck her she also gives great head
even tho she now married
Did she end up finding out it was you? Congrats on accomplishing what Jack couldn't! Loved it.
I love any story that combines incest and voyeurism! I especially loved when Tom went down on Katy. So hot! I cant wait to read part 2.
Can't wait until he replaces her loser brother as her main fuck stick. If she resists he can blackmail her for gobbling and fucking her bro.
I like them but NEVER bigger that a C cup. What interest me is pussy. It's made especially for a dick and cum.
I am so hard and breathless.
I wanted him CAUGHT!!!
I what him rewarded!
Can’t wait to see where you are taking us.
I need to relax.
I've been hesitant to read this series I just kept scrolling but now that I am reading the story I feel like I should have read and reread the series several times by now. What a waste of energy scrolling through my lists tsk tsk 🙈🙉🙊
Man, I love this story already. But somebody us going to have hell to pay once Jack finds out somebody else did what he couldn't do and did it better even with a bigger cock than his. And will Katy let Jack fuck her again now that she a better mysterious lover?