Lamas Night

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Since his killing of the prisoner, his mind continued to go in unusefull circles, and his innards contracted with guilt and anger. Had he acted with the hot-blooded impulsiveness of a true man, he would never have invoked the honor code by imprisoning the Black Macgregor. Instead, he would have run the bastard through and let his blood soak the stones of his Court Yard at first sight of him. But no, he must scheme and plan, and now more had come to know suffering at the hands of his enemies. He had not yet been able to look either Iona or Lise in the face.

Before the door closed behind the sad procession, one figure hung back and came to him where he stood alone. It was Mary, though at first he could not recognize her. It was not only that heavy hair covered her shoulders and made a soft, unfamiliar frame to her face. It was also that her baring and aspect were entirely altered. She held herself straight and proud, and her blue eyes shone out of a face which bore a new vitality. Though obviously tired from a sleepless night, still, there was a weight lifted from her, and he registered with surprise that she was young and pretty.

She came to stand before him, looking into his hard face. "My Lord," she said with quiet dignity, "Vengeance is a dish rarely tasted by women. Tonight, I sampled it when I had long given up hope. It has freed me from shame and fear. I will nae forget that it came tae me at your hand, by your blade."

Colin's features twisted and his eyes went to the door, through which the other three women had vanished. "Too late I fear," he replied bleakly.

She saw the guilt. From her newly discovered place of pride and strength, she wanted to find words to comfort him but could not. Finally, all she could think to say was, "Please tell Master Owen tae be patient. Such wounds are terrible, but they can heal. I saw how they were together at the fires..."

Colin turned away with great bitterness. He too had seen how Lise and Owen were at the fires, and he had seen Owen's face as Lise was lead away by the women. He strode from the bed chamber and kicked out savagely, over-turning a heavy bench, and sending it skidding across the floor.

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3 Comments
AnonymousAnonymousabout 14 years ago

This was amazing.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 15 years ago
Enjoyable

The story itself was quite enjoyable, & believeable. I read alot, & i deffinatly see alot of potential here, and look forward to reading more in the future. Also, while "all or nothing" in the contex of "accent" may be a rule for some, it dosen't make or break marketable material, Johanna Lindsey & multitudes of other authors are published proof of that. Gratz hun, keep up the good work

AnonymousAnonymousabout 17 years ago
Your going into and out of Dialect

on certain words to lend an air of the time and place failed because you did change some words and ignored other words to keep the story legible.

Completely or not at all should be a rule in writing dialect. And this use of some words lead some readers to think that you were simplely misspelling. Without an Oxford English Dictionary (the $2000 type) I cannot trace your words to see if they had actually been used where and how you wrote this piece. Do one or the other.

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