All Comments on 'Live from the Game Ch. 03'

Really good tension here...

...in this tale of matrimonial intrigue. Do wish it was a bit more than a 10 or 15 minute read every 24 hours. You may want the grammar given a closer look. Some sentences require a second read to obtain correct meaning. Otherwise, really enjoying this so far. Keep it going. Fuddpucker

I like the story but geez... but to long between posts....

Just blew the credibility out the window.

Dude is scum, wife is scum... the Navy Seal team in on the case.

Well, it will be an amusing revenge fantasy...

Will keep on reading.

Green-something

Man, this waiting for the finish is killing me

Great story, enjoying it immensely. Looking forward to your next post.

i can sense cuckboy's nuts shrinking and drawing up now. please, you've already turned him into a woman. a 'bitch' even. i've lost all my sympathy for him, so he might as well suck some dick and kill himself.

I'm looking forward to the next chapter - hoping the bitch-wive gets finally what she deserves. Please, Jezzaz, no reconcilliation this time (like in "Out of love")!

A clear 5* story for me, don't spoil it.

First of all, this story is a success, for me at least, in that I am eager to read the next installment. It has some very strong points - especially the male lead's reflections on his marriage and what has brought them to this situation. It's original and to the point. However, other aspects work against this: the tedious and derivative account of collecting evidence, the seedy motel, the posse of loyal friends who will do anything include break the law for their buddy. We've been through all this so many times. It's difficult to avoid cliche entirely and still post something on this site - and my own stories are guilty, so I don't mean to take a superior line - but we must try. Don't take your cues from Literotica, but from real life. Don't write about the mechanics of gaining evidence etc but about the reasons for marital breakdown. That will be strong and original. I will hold judgement on the revenge plot until it is complete - but my own experience of this site is that a well-worked revenge, far from being sweet, leaves a very disagreeable taste in the mouth and I wonder at the people who can feel satisfied. Of course, there are exceptions...

I can't wait until the fur flies!

Anther great chapter. I really liked how hubby wasn't a mega techhead who could wire up his home for surveliance at the drop of a hat and how he found listening to the recordings boring. Nice touch and very realistic.

We are, of course, wild to know what he plans on doing to the couple. Hope he does remember to use the divorce lawyer's papers. It seems to me that he has managed to put in two weeks without making love to his wife. If she was sharp.....

Can't wait for the next installment. I am more anxious than a kid on Christmas Eve. Great insights into how he is feeling. Very authentic. Again, the brilliant part of this story is that the wife is still clueless. We got a bit of insight into what she is feeling about her lover, but just a taste. Five stars.

Hearing the guy describe his wife's sexual appetite was an outstanding element to the story. It was emotionally painful. Well done.

You've done an INCREDIBLE job of making this betrayal feel visceral and intense. So many of these stories are so obsessed with response they undercut the very event that makes it necessary, injuring their own story and making it feel just sort of mean. You've wrapped up such a powerful little set of characters that it makes me want to throw my little half-completed works in the trash.

This story is very well written and takes you on a heartbreaking emotional roller coaster ride. Although written in first person, the author does a wonderful job of portraying the other characters emotions and letting the reader know what they're feeling and thinking. Five stars all around. Anxiously waiting for the rest of the story.

Maybe it's just me or the fact that the end seems to be approaching but sometimes these late chapters seem to drag a bit. Don't know if I really liked the episode about the apartment but it does seem to be necessary. It would have been nice if Crystal could have been worked into it so she could hear what kind of ass this type of moron is. Disappointing to hear Deanna was so quick to bed, I hope you will let us know why.

I wish you would tell everyone from the start that you intend a week long, 20 page novel. I read these stories to see the clever ways other people think, not to get caught up in the "book of the month club." While I am reading your dissertation, I don't have the time to read someone else's clever thoughts. Thus, I never read stories, for example, by SS06 that are 12+ pages long, etc.

Otherwise, I am screwed no matter which avenue I choose: abandon your story in the middle, or continue on, hoping not to miss too many other new clever story ideas.

Or as Samuel Clemens once said, if I had more time, I would have written less.

Just a favor, please.

Us married men are angry as hell and want payback. The problem now is that she has betrayed him so badly, yet she will still be destroyed when she gets burned and be pitiful and beg, the reader will not feel satisfied. We know it'll be on the jumbotron and probably on TV, but no revenge after a betrayal like this will feel good to us insecure husbands that are reading the story. No matter what happens, the guy is going to be miserable, alone, and unhappy, even if he does not get a divorce. He will be alone. No matter how her life goes, his life is destroyed and no revenge can change that.

Great build up, attention to detail. However, with the mention of how she dropped into bed in a heartbeat really begs that you have to, at some point, do a chapter/sequel from her point of view.

Interesting Deanna was such a pushover and that Crystal mentions don't worry the kids are yours. There is a lot we need to know about the wife Deanna.....This is some tale but it's like a slow simmering pot...Crystal knows more then she is telling.

We could use a chapter from Deanna's POV see Blood From A Turnip by Cpete on how to handle that.

Great story...Chapter 2 and 3 FIVE Stars

This story is so well written great job. Can't wait for the next installment. Don't keep us waiting.

You had what could be a good story, but I'll never know. I don't know why people think they have to drag things out. I don't like series where you have to wait for the next installment. If you're going to write a story, then write it! At least make each chapter a stand alone, not some drawn out "what is going to happen next" crap. Honestly you could have had this story complete by now, if you didn't keep going off on those wordy tangents. I didn't vote on this, because I know how the voting works on this site and I wouldn't do that to another writer who is trying to put out decent work. Good luck and I hope this works out for you.

Myhands316

No revenge is ever complete...but looking forward to your solution. A five star story.

Dude, you've got to get this story completely posted. This has been so difficult to read a little bit day by day. Can't wait to see how you have this all play out.

OK, a good story, but seriously, you need to wrap it up next installment. If you need an extra day, fine.

Very well done, lots of emotion, and plausible. I am impressed with this stories writing thus far, and hope it continues to be a fine journey and the ending worthy of the set up.

HDK is quite right with his comment. Regardless, Ryan needs to close this sad chapter and move on. He has verified the worst, she has betrayed his trust, and forsaken him. Simon is right, all need to know, and go down in flames.

I was impressed with Ryan meeting the lover. Brilliantly handled, brilliant.

I felt his sorrow over what Deanna willfully did to their marriage. She utterly destroyed it and he knows it.

Cannot see a reconcile, and as I mentioned I hope the ending is worthy.

Thank you,

M1*****

Don't worry the kids are yours, means she took precautions to make sure they were your kids. The four poster for BDSM means this is a BDSM relationship and the wife is a sub. True subs find it easier to have a master who controls and uses them and a lover who cares for them. The items from his home means the wife is slipping things out of the home without his permission. Crystal and his wife are company whores used to guarantee accounts. The azzhole in this is a user and his conversation implies the wife is just a whore and can come with the property. It is apparent that he wife is taking way to much time away from the family and saying she would get a weekend is way to much. There is no reason to contact the guys wife, she may already know and approve and would simply tell her husband. This can be angled to keep the slut but neither the husband nor the children really need her in their lives. Her lifestyle is not such as to expose children to and can be argued in court. No discussion has been given at all to the risk associated with STDS and HIV that she has exposed herself to, her husband, and indirectly her children.

...and I enjoy reading it. But I also think it is high time for the story to develope.

People might begin losing interest if the story draws along at a slow pace.

I, for one of many I am sure, am very anxious to see the ax fall on the two cheaters. The hurt should be in proportion or greater to their immorality. Great story and thanks for the emotional tension you have given us as readers--my heart rate actually rises significantly while reading your story.

This story is probably the best I have read here on describing the shock he faced when finding out "what" he really was married to. The detail and introspection means it moves slowly, but for me fast enough. Can't wait for the remaining chapters, it should be priceless.

And the cheaters are burnt to the max.

Nice story! Can't wait for the next chapter.

if this is a no fault state the division of property and child support will fall on him, how is he going to do better than that, she gets the house the kids and support..NO FAULT.. He gets screwed in this real world. what ever he is planning better not fall back on him if it is illegal.. well see what the author has in mind...

I hate a twist which stang06 gave us.

Oh great, another moron who doesn't know what "loving wife" means. I guess all you wimpy guys think "hot wife" means "female spouse with a fever."

Wrong category for this crap. Oh, and "category" means any general or comprehensive division. I doubt you whiners know that word, either.

If you stick to this story line you have a definite winner on your hands. Seem well thought out and you gave him friends to help him not wimp out. Two very sleazy villains in the wife and other cheating spouse. Total disregard for their loved ones at home. Very interesting.

I loved all three stories. I am looking forward to the next chapter. I hope it will be soon.

Thanks

Jo

What category is this supposed to go in? Did you notice that some of the better authors on this site seem to think that this is a pretty good read? I agree with them. What's with you? Just bitter I guess. You know why. This isn't Shakespeare but a damn good story anyways. Notice the scores little? You seem to be in the minority. As usual,

how to kill them both without being caught.

Until now, it was just another get fucked, get mad, get even BTB story; borderline boring. Your writing has elevated it above that, especially the dialogue with his co-conspirators, the wife's bull, the wife, etc and his own internal monologue.

But don't press your luck. Rule of thumb? Whenever you write a sentence that you think is really cool, ask yourself if including it is worth distracting your reader from the core narrative?

Enough said.

jezzaz, you, sir, are a true master of the cliffhanger! Still don't have a real feel to how you may conclude this. That makes it even more tantalizing. Deanna is turning out as pretty twisted, it's pure torture to wait for the next chapter. I suppose you could still pull her out and save her marriage, but either way it looks like she's headed for some real agony. If the marriage can't be saved, I hope you can get the kids away from her twisted ass.

Cordelera, raging on another author, especially an author so far above your own talent and abilities as Jezzaz is, just shows how little fucking class you really have.

As another commenter said, bitter much!

Seems to believe that it's OK for her to write stories about willing cuckolds for LW but it's not OK for other writers to post stories about unwilling cuckolds who go for revenge.

If you go all the way back to 2000-2001 and set up a spreadsheet and have a column for willing cuckold stories and another for revenge, you will find plenty of both. LW is a catch all category. The only requirement is a wife (sometimes girlfriend) that is sexually active. Sometimes, the activity is with the husband and probably would be more appropriate for Romance than LW.

In any event, the category is LW. That's says nothing about the husband's reaction which can legitimately be all over the place from instigator to acceptance to murderous rage. Only the writer gets to decide on the husband's response--not you, not me, not the BTB crowd or the cuck crowd. If it shames you that a husband would not be like Haley's husband, that's your problem.

Solution? Don't read BTB stories. Just read the ones where the husband is a wimp cuckold. That will improve your blood pressure.

@ Jezzaz 1. I used secret money deposits for my heroes and spare computers in the job for gather information for weekly/two weekly deleted file.

2. I hope you do not try RAAC, against writting reconciliation stories. Deanna will never be faithful with him, only for 2-3 years provisory abstinentia after a RAAC. She will be faithful with her third husband pehaps..........at 55 years old age.

You say this is going to be a BTB story but given your track record im inclined to think its going to end with RAAC.

You are a master @ this. Keep the saga going!

Daytime soap drama that you are forcing down the throats of your readers. There's no redeeming qualities for any char especially the husband. He's weak and will take her back cum filled pussy and all. I've read stories like this before by writers better then jezzaz, they say btb but it will be a joke rec fic with him being the cuck. Please keep writing your stories but don't lie and say it is a BTB. SInce clearly you are more slanted to be of a female backer in all your stories because every story you pile on the husband and the endings are always jokes. Just end it with the husband eating creampies from deaana every night it really make most of your readers happy, keeps their dreams alive.

Contrary to some commentators, I like the story, however, having said that I think it is time to bring it to a close......I am not a BTB type of guy, believing that anyone can make a mistake-screw up if you will. However, this was not a one time slip, but an extended affair. I believe that there need to be consequences for both of them and unfortunately those consequences also impact the family, but it is what it is...she has become a cheating slut for another man and that is not acceptable. Hard to hope for reconcilation (even though I want to) when the crime is so blatant and hurtful. Please wrap it up and bring some closure...ti would be nice to know why she behaved in such a way.

Some excellent writing here, Jezzaz, from the 1st installment on.

Enjoying it 100%

Can't wait for the wrap-up, but at the same time I don't want it to actually finish.

Uh oh! Did I hurt da whittle boys' feelings? The Loving Wives category is defined as "Married extra-marital fun: swinging, sharing & more," by this website you morons.

Stupid must be contagious from reading these pathetic "I'm the great wonderful man" stories.

showed something that she is a retard, just think this fucking loser calling down someone else work.

Great read, love an inventive comeback by a wronged spouse. Rockyderek_ca

@ littlecordelera if the betrayed husband is not a creampieeating cucky, the betrayed husband EXTRAMARITAL FUN IS TO GET RID OF THE CHEATING WIFE, TO CHANGE THE CHEATING WIFE TO A BETTER NEW WOMAN (WIFE, MATE, GIRLFRIEND) AND IT MAY BE A GOOD REVENGE AGAINST THE CHEATING WIFE AND HER LOVER(s)!

A example collections from Loving Wives:

The 20 best revenge stories on LIT are the nexts according to me:

1. Vulcez �How Are You?� which is a Romantic Revenge Story Hurricane, Typhoon, Gale, Cyclone, Tornado, Earthquake, Tsunami, Avelanch, which was steered by a 17 years old smart daughter to her cheating Mom!

2. FrancisMacomber �The Six O'clock News Slot� which is a Modern Figaro Type Revenge Story with a TRUE friend who assisted his friend in the revenge and if you are the total winner usefull to be generouse to the loser!

3. Longhorn_07 �Fool Me Once� which is also a Modern Figaro Type Revenge Story with 2 allies a man and a woman who got married after the revenge. BTW do not wait fair human relation managemant if you cheat!

4. Itmgr2010 �Black & Tan Blues Ch. 04� which is a Modern Figaro Type Revenge Story with assisting friends in the revenge. Do not wait fair human relation managemant if you cheat and if you are the total winner usefull to be generouse to the loser!

5. BeerMaker �Dawn: A Cheating Slut Wife� wich is a Modern Figaro Type Revenge Story where the betrayed husband�s assistents are his NO DNA TEST PROOF CHILDREN!

6. FrancisMacomber �The Honey Trap� wich is a Modern Figaro Type Revenge Story where the assistant is an escort girl with heart!

7. OldHideki � How Does it Feel to be a Cuckold?� which is a Modern Figaro Type Revenge Story, where everything will be up side down!

8. StangStar06 �Back on the Block Ch. 01� which is a Modern Figaro Type Revenge Story with very humorouse twist at the end!

9. Papatoad �Telephone Blitz� which is succesful humorouse Modern Figaro Type Revenge Story, where the husband prevented the physical cheating and later the reconcilation is possible!

10. BigK10 �...And Stay There!� which is a Cruel Revenge Story where a friend assists other friend to avoid a marriage with a slut!

11. Harddaysknight �Not Guilty� which is the first at the most revenge story fans but according to me it is not among the first 10 best. Why, because there are dead people in the story!

12. Seurat �Homecoming Call� A Romantic Revenge Story on 1 page!

13. StangStar06 �Love is for Suckers� which is a Romantic revenge Story with LUCKY suckers! SS06 did not write them ANR so only 13th!

14. Cpete �Family Guy� which is a Romantic Revenge Story, where the exwife is burnt everyday!

15. Mitchfren �Bailing Out� which is a Modern Figaro Type and Cruel Revenge Mix Story and a British wrote!

16. Tony_Ford �Scales Of Justice� which is a Modern Figaro Type Revenge Story using the USA Constitution!

17. Sojoman �Revelation Blues Pt. 04� which is a Modern Figaro Type Revenge story and the serial cheater exwife got a serial cheater Second Chance Husband. The Author did not write Second Chance woman to the exhusband so instead of 7th the story is only 17th!

18. Likegoodwine �No Strings Attached� which is a Modern Figaro Type and Romantic Revenge Mix Story. It may be 100% true according to this North Caroline guy from the You Tube: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bIvJms3wlaY

19. Cpe te �Blood from a Turnip� whose is a bacground story from lucksmith �Let the Punishment Fit the Crime� but Cpete�s story is more revenge story than lucksmith�s story is.

20. Azpiri �Shattered Ch. 03� which is Modern Figaro Type Revenge Story with a fantastic Romantic Revenge situation at the end. Why is it among the best 20, because I like when David wins on Goliats! His weapon is IT!

It means stories about swinging and cheating, not non-erotic stories about revenge. That's called 'Non-erotic', and it's there for a reason. Unless the revenge includes some sex scenes it doesn't belong anywhere else.

And Duna, shut the fuck up, no one asked for a list of stories you like. No one /EVER/ asks you for that, no one cares what kinds of stories you like. Even the BTB, misogynist, angry little men who like to imagine beating up women like cantbuymy and Huedogg crowd don't like your comments. Seriously, shut up.

@ litlecoldera Now first story the "Dexter's Renaissance Ch. 13-14" fits 100% with the sexual majority husband extramarital fun, because the betrayed husband charecter gets rid of his cheating wife, he does an excellent revenge on his wife and he finds a better new woman!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Smooth ! Not as much impact as previous chapter. Still, very good.

One caution , having the protagonist meet the enemy is a mistake.

Come on all he needs is surprise and weighted gloves whatever. Busted ribs , arm and legs , testicles ; Crystal provides story cover. Then the divorce again Crystal

testifies in his favor, provides dates times text. Story over.

I guess ,for me, the meeting negates my suspension of belief.

Whew ! That's enough lecture.

Keep it coming Jezzaz .

AMerryMan

@ rontlinecaster I ask a little brainstorming from you! What would you do with more than 4000 sexual majority husband stories here????????????

BTW To injure others in personal feedback is your constant habit?

... I'm hoping he isn't going to drag this out like "When We Were Married".

Dont know how you are going to wrap this up satisfactorily in three pages in the next installment. Worried about that. So far, we have had very little insight into the wife-what her motivations are. As author you get to decide if we get any, but the revenge, aftermath etc seems like it will need more than three pages.

What happens to Crystal? What happens to Lawler? What happens to this family, how do they cope going forward with the destruction and anguish Deanna caused?

Good luck and cant wait until tomorrow!

patillie

It's a good read. Flash stories are great, but when you take the time to delve into the mindset of a character, their life, what episodes in the past that may have tempered his or her moral outlook, his expected or unexpected reactions to any situation, makes the read much better. When I first started writing, I missed the fine print, and wrote a few stories about loyal and faithful wives, or spouses that had stumbled but recovered.

I was surprised when a friend steered me to the essay In Loving Memory, by a fine writer, toomuchinmyhead, using one of my stories, Defrosting The Freezer, as the death knell of the Loving Wives category. On reflection I think it fits, the amorous adventure just happened to be with her husband. For the first time in their married lives they found themselves alone, able to indulge in and explore things not available before because of family restraints.

P'T Barnum comes to mind, with his comment about fooling people. It's the same here, except pleasing them. Some are happy with your work all of the time, some some of the time, some none of the time. But you know what? They still read them.

I often wonder about people who start complaining after the second or third chapter.

If it irritates them that bad, why do they keep reading, are they masochistic? I usually have an opinion after the first page of the first chapter of whether or not I want to invest my time in it.

Jezzaz, put your stories where you want. I'll still follow you.

I'm constantly told I'm in the wrong category. If I put it in Loving Wives it should be in Romance. If I put it in Romance, it should Have been in Erotic Coupling. If I put it in Non Erotic it should never have been there. I used to worry about it, now I just put it where I want..

Maybe little cordelera was right, maybe the site needs to redefine categories, divide them, add new sections. It might help readership.

Meanwhile, back at the site, I can't wait for the next installment. Good work.

QHML1

@ QHML1 I began my campaing for a while to divide the Loving Wives into two hubs. The readers and stories (authors) could be divided into two groups according to the behavioral of the IMAGINED husbands. The (imagined) husbands like their wives have sex with others as their husbands or the (imagined) husbands do not like their wives have sex with others. The two story types are so different, as the Star and it's planets.First I was alone, but I have recently read some comments with the dividing idea from others and I am glad you are resonated for the hub share too.

I have thoroughly enjoyed this story to date and anticipate the coming installments with pleasure. Can you tell us the number of chapters (read postings) this story will involve?

It's getting better and nearer to the climax (no pun intended - well this is "Literotica"). Really looking forward to the next chapter (s). Cheers!

Tell me. What category would YOU put this story in? You seem to have appointed yourself the categort expert. Which one?

Yes.

I don't think multiple hubs is the answer - they just need to show the story tags beside the story and you'd know if it was faithful, cheating, cuckolding, revenge etc

It's a little annoying that stories get voted down solely on being cuck stories, I wouldn't like them but I'm not the audience... But I feel bad for the authors.

on a side note: qhml1 - when do we see pt3?

@funkso

Maybe, just maybe, if the cuck stuff was posted in the fetish section where it belongs and where cuck stories seem to score well it would solve the problem for everyone. You only have to look at the LW hall of fame to see the type of stories readers want and look at how low the scores are for the cuck shit.

Now the cucky freaks will try and blame all this on one bombing but when the same story is posted on SOL, the funny thing is, the stories still get shit scores!

stars!

Look the straight guy is going to be the loser here in a divorce. No fault means fuck the innocent party. He is better off making her beg and crawl for forgiveness , only if this was her only affair . I see no way short of murder that he will ever get the kids . He even realizes that himself. After so many years and 3 kids what went wrong, is she a self centered bitch or has some mental problem. He needs more answers.to many year invested to just cut and run. She can go on screwing whoever and he will pay till the last kid turns 18..

We learn a little more about the wife in this one. Hard to believe that this is her first affair. I expected the lover to have a bunch of women on the side. He makes it sound like she came on to him. It would make sense if during the course of her work she developed a craving for sex with her customers to keep them happy and get her freak on before going home to her safe, loving husband.

Your use of Ryan getting the lover's permission to record with his Iphone and the captured conversation where Lawler laughs at his slut girlfriend and offer to throw her in with the deal will kill her when she hears it. That was brilliant! I don't know how Lawler thinks that wife wouldn't be able to find him when he moves on. She is involved in the sale of his condo she'd have access to all of his info. His wife is even on facebook. I still think he needs to crack her computer/email and find out whether there were other affairs. This one seemed to have been too easy. He just met her 6 weeks before when she was supposed to be staging his apartment. This was not a case where he had to wear her down to seduce her. The decoration in the condo from their anniversary trip was a nice touch.

Wifey will be in shock when the nice husband blows up her affair and exposes her. She is going to cry and beg for forgiveness. It's too bad that she will get half of everything and the kids if he divorces her. He seems to be too nice a guy to keep her as his personal fuck toy, maid and nanny but that's what I'd do. I'd tell her that she had to stay home and take care of my house and kids while I got even. I'd make sure to have her tested and to use protection before using her as a sex slave. She might even enjoy the submission. Looking forward to your next chapter. I expect that you will own all of the top stories this week. Congrats!

Like the story and how it is building but not sure why when Ryan has the goods he comes off like a wimp. Instead of telling his wife he's not in the mood for sex he either pretends t be sick or drunk. And why doesn't he let her know the watch is for running not cycling and doesn't she know what he does. Seems he comes off too weak in these situations. Put a little doubt in his wife. Even if stopped cheating now the damage is already done.

Can't wait for the next installment 5*

I can see both trains on the same track heading for each other. Know it's going to happen and for the life of me I can't turn away. Writing is wonderful as been noted and thank you so much for sharing.

Every once in a while a story is so well written that it leaves you impatient for the next chapter.Some end well, others don't. So far, so good. Remember, in the best stories the hero always wins and evildoers are destroyed. The husband keeps getting stronger and I am looking forward to the next installment. Thanks for the entertainment. Five 5's.

When you close this story I hope you come back with her version so we can see what went wrong in her life to do this to her family.Is she a full time cheater, Long for the large cock, Tired of her sex life at home, or to see if she longs for what Crystal is doing?? THIS IS THE BEST STORY IN THE LAST YEAR BAR NONE. Keep it up, and Thanks for a great read.

Men cheat because we want to fuck every girl we see, women cheat because they need more than what they are getting...so what's her reason? Happy home life, busy with kids, an attentive and successful husband...and ZERO remorse or guilt? So wither she isn't cheating and they are both being set up or she is a sociopath.

And hubby? We are expected to believe he is the CEO of a midsize company but he can't even get the balls to confront his wife?

A shame because your sorry has such promise.

Mate. You have taken the story cleverly to a couple of new places yet again. The encounter with the Bull was brilliant. it also left some interesting threads hanging as others have pointed out. The 4 poster bed & the fact the wife was so quick to hop in the sack with the Bull plus the conversations where he is trying to get Deanna to say "I love you" even tho he doesn't give a shit are pure gold. I know some ppl are keen for you to wrap up - as I am too - BUT I think it would really add to the story to take another divergence (and possibly piss some readers off) and give us a bit of where Deanna's mind is at & why she has done this. The conversations she had with the Bull started to give us a hint. Maybe she is a sub and still does NEED her loving hubby at home, yet now it looks like that is a forlorn hope?? Also, what is the go with his family? Does she know? Is there a happy ending? The general direction at the moment says no - Ryan is just going to end up staying depressed & miserable even if his revenge comes off. Ken

I don't necessarily agree that a divorce would destroy him. The guy, after all, is not homeless or jobless or family-less. He has 3 kids, two biological and one-adopted he considered to be most loved and treasured.

Only a decent, moral, ethical person AND A GOOD PARENT would talk about his kids like that.

In other words, he WILL STILL have his family, minus the idiotic woman/wife.

It's been said, both implicitly and explicitly, in life and in fiction, that the best revenge is a life lived well. The guy is a father and an accomplished hard working man; he WILL have good women wanting to be his life-partner. His job is merely to choose someone different from his wife.

The AUTHOR, now, he has a big task ahead of him (or had it, when he first wrote the story, assuming it's finished and is merely being posted one slow chapter at a time here). As HDK noted, no matter how he tells the story, from here on to the end, many married men and women will not satisfied. The wife is just too heinous in her conducts, but, not unlike all other cheaters, she PRETENDS to be very loving; and perhaps she has been, TOWARDS the kids.... so, again, no matter how the AUTHOR skin this cat, from here on, it's NOT gonna make all people happy...

So, in THAT FRONT, the author has written a very good, gripping story.... worthy of many responses and posts, to the left, to the right, to the center, and from above and below... in analysis....

The only way that the author could ruin this ---- and MANY writers do it, for some fetish Lit reason or another ---- is to make the guy do an about face and say, more or less: "Well, I can't live without the slut, so I decided not to do anything about it."

Other than that... if the story follows the current trajectory, the bitch is gonna suffer quite a bit. And THAT's what most of us expect the story to go.... although, again, expectations and realities are often times different from what we expect....

Bullshit.

It's easy to get over a cheating slut who has betrayed someone like that. Alone? There are plenty of women out there to choose from.

You seem to take great pleasure in stealing the thunder from another talented author. Why?

cant believe these idiots that do not like a series story. If you dont like them then dont start a story that has in its title "Part 1". and plus you have historically put these things out at least every other day, so no one has to wait around for them.

I miss a day and now I can read both chapters one after the other. I can't wait to see what happens. Excellent!!!

what is in store for the stupid bitch. I would like to see Ryan hook up with some one by the end of story though....

HDK is right. Here's what he said: "no revenge after a betrayal like this will feel good to us insecure husbands that are reading the story. No matter what happens, the guy is going to be miserable, alone, and unhappy, even if he does not get a divorce. He will be alone. No matter how her life goes, his life is destroyed and no revenge can change that."

That's a true statement.

Sure, he can find another wife. He's a highly-paid CEO and even though he's aging, balding and overweight, lots of women will line up. After all, he's a meal ticket. Good women who look just fine and are intelligent, charming, good cooks and housekeepers, and who will work hard to keep him well-sexed will put him high in their list of eligible men.

So what?

Will he grow old with the wife of his youth? Will he enjoy the triumphs of their children with the woman who gave them birth? Will the myriad little shared experiences be there with any new woman no matter how suitable?

No. None of that is possible. It's gone--forever. His wife destroyed it all. Like virginity, fidelity cannot be regrown.

This is a tragedy.

Does that mean he should stay? Of course not. You're not listening. The damage is done. It can never be undone. Everybody loses.

Yes. Life goes on. Yes, if he wants, finding another woman will be easy for him. None of that changes the fact that his marriage and family are wrecked; never to be fixed, forever and ever.

HDK is a grown-up. Being an adult means awareness of consequences. He knows pain when he sees it.

Thanks for sharing.

Reading the comments are almost as much fun as reading the story. People are really into the Ryan-Deanna debacle. HDK has it; Ryan is destroyed no matter what the outcome. Some anon made a fool of himself dissing HDK on this. Sierra-Whiskey got it; this is really heartrending gut wrenching stuff.

To coin this pathetic writers mind excrement as superb is a travesty of perception !

Easy 1 star.

see above comment for confirmation

“I would never be free of Deanna. She would always be there, as their mother, always reminding me of what she'd done.”

I never understood absentee fathers in divorces until this statement. I never thought that in order to be present in their kids’ lives they also had to deal with the ex-wife, and how painful that could be. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not excusing them, I just understand them better.

great writers voice. Five stars.

if there is one critical thing I could say, it is the unrealistic convenience of this predators confession of the affair, he offers up details that it is hard to believe anyone offering up to a stranger. This is very minor and does not detract from the quality of the tale. It is just that you have effectively poked some fun at Literotica-like qualities, and yet this seems like one.

The way you have this guy working through his own emotions, his internal musings, is brilliant. It comes across as authentic.

going upstream at the same speed as the current going down. Lots of talk about going somewhere but still haven't moved in relation to the starting position.

He should at least have manned up and TOLD her the gift was useless, that the iPhone did MORE, better!

“Either way, it meant I was not hanging out with her.” – If Deanna usually did it, wouldn’t that have also kept them apart?

“that I'd bought Deanna while we were on a trip to Vermont for our fourth wedding anniversary” – Maybe not an anniversary gift per se, but still a gift bought on an anniversary trip, a little too personal to be loaning out to ANYONE, certainly NOT a lover!

Nuf.

and then its batter up and play ball. TK U MLJ LV NV

At first in chapter 1 I was really pissed off reading the first page because a lot that just seemed like useless info. Reading this chapter now realizing that was all really good info especially when he's realizes his wife loves him like he loves Paul. Genius.

Deanna is certainly a piece of work. Giving away anniversary gifts? Giving this other guy she wouldn't consider giving her husband. And then lying about it.

Two thoughts: if she didn't want to stay married why not end first; and why not talk to your husband about issues before it gets to a tipping point.

I still really like Ryan's conversation with Crystal addressing this and shooting down all of her excuses.

Sounds like she has been a selfish bitch for a long time.

Still hoping for no RAAC, or no "cheater becomes the victim, and husband is the bad guy twist."

I take back what I said. The author has really brought this around from the initial glib and irritating oratory of part one.