Looking Back

I don't know why but I asked where John was.

"He's fast asleep after putting a load in my pussy. Just to make sure he didn't come here and interfere, I slipped him a sleeping pill like Tom asked me to do. He's out for the night. I did bring you a present from him," replied Mary.

She climbed on the bed and straddled my head with her knees on either side. Her pussy was directly over my face. I could see her cum covered shaved pussy only inches away from my mouth.

"Suck it, Helen. Suck your husband's cum from my pussy. I know you want to," replied Mary

"No, no, I can't do it," I said.

Right then the man in my pussy came and got off me.

"Oh, God, the tingling is still there," I said.

"Start sucking," said Mary, "and I'll see you get more cock and get rid of that itch," she was smiling.

I don't know why I did it but I started sucking on Mary's pussy. I felt another cock enter my pussy. It helped the tingling so I worked on Mary's pussy. I was falling into their game. I couldn't help it. I was drugged and drunk and being fucked and eating my husband's cum out of another woman's pussy. I just let myself go. I really couldn't help it.

One man climbed off and another climbed on. I had lost count on how many men had fucked me; I just needed the tingling to end. I didn't really want to be fucking these men, but I needed it. As I was tonguing Mary she had an orgasm. She got off me and started kissing me. She and another woman started sucking on my breasts. My breasts still had a slight tingle too but for some reason these women knew what to do. They were gentle yet firm in their playing with my tits. It felt good.

I don't know how long I had been lying there getting fucked. The women were gone but different men kept appearing. A black man asked me if I wanted his black cock. I told him to just fuck me. For some reason he thought he was something special. I looked at his cock and it wasn't any longer or bigger than any others I had fucked. He must be trying to live the myth about black men.

I will say it was black. I mean really black. He kept saying if I wanted it, I had to beg him for it. I just needed a cock, even a dildo would do the trick but I guess I had to humor this ass.

"Please fuck me with your big black cock," I said.

He asked me to turn over because he liked to do it from behind. I turned over and he plowed into me. All the time while fucking me, he told me how good he was. I was nearly out of it but I knew this guy loved himself. I was just another piece of white trash to him.

When he climbed off another man climbed on. I overheard him talking to Tom while pushing his cock into me.

"Damn, Tom, where did you find this one? You gave her the pills, didn't you? Damn, she's a hot one. Does her husband know she's here?" the man asked.

"He wanted a little swap, so Mary fucked him and gave him a sleeping pill. He has no idea what's going on. He thinks I was going to try to get in her pants and send her back to his room," replied Tom.

I was still on my stomach when the next man took my ass. At least he had a thin dick and he coated it first with the cum in my pussy. I knew it wasn't his first time. It was very uncomfortable and even hurt some but it did help with the tingling. When he dumped a load in my ass I did my best to turnover before someone else got the same idea of taking my ass.

I was pissed at John but I wasn't sure what I was going to do. Tom was taking me a second time and I wanted to climax and end it all so bad. Mary came over and saw me rubbing my own pussy while being fucked by her husband.

"Ready to come, Helen? Want me to help you?" asked Mary.

Through teary eyes I said, "Please, Mary, I need to cum. Please help me."

Mary reached down and while her husband was busy fucking me, she rubbed my pussy. I could feel my climax building. The drug was finally wearing off as Mary kept smiling at me and rubbing my hot spot. I screamed out and pushed my hips up hard against Tom's cock. I must have come over and over again.

When the sensations were calming down Mary leaned over and kissed me. I did kiss her back as her husband exploded in me for the second time. He thought he was the one who made me come; he was wrong. It was all the total fucking, getting rid of the tingling and finally Mary rubbing my hot spot.

I crashed within minutes. I woke up in a daze maybe an hour later. There were bodies lying all over the place. I got up slowly. Damn, did I ever hurt. I staggered into the bathroom and let all the excess cum fall out as I took a pee. I wiped myself as best I could and put on my clothes. I looked in the mirror and didn't even recognize myself. I saw the different bottles of drugs sitting there and dropped them into my purse.

I quietly open the door and staggered up to the elevator and to my room. I glanced at the clock and saw it was after four. I must have been fucked over and over for more than three hours. I saw John asleep on the bed. He wasn't even under the covers. His limp cock was out of his briefs.

I was sore as can be. My legs ached from being apart for so long and my pussy was swollen and even a little bruised. I had to take a shower. I was in it for a half hour, trying to wash off the filth I felt. My pussy hurt so much and my breasts ached. I slipped on my nightgown and went to the other bed and stayed away from John. I know I didn't want to confront him then. I took one of the sleeping pills I found in Tom's room. I fell asleep and didn't get up till noon.

Chapter 5 - After the Party

I woke up and the room was quiet. John must have stepped out. I was rather glad to be alone. I needed time to think. My legs and private areas still hurt. I was honestly hoping that it was all a dream or should I say nightmare. I was wondering exactly what John knew and how involved he was in this escapade.

I was sure that he had sex with Mary, but did he know anything about what happened with me? If he set it up I would divorce him in a minute. He knew how I felt about swinging. I knew we had to talk when he came back to the room.

I was sitting there having a cup of coffee when there was a knock at the door. Maybe John forgot his key. I opened it and there was Mary. I was pissed but how much could I take out on her? She chose this lifestyle.

"Helen, may I come in? I need to talk to you."

I let her in; I needed answers and I was sure she had some of them. She came in and sat down. She looked cute standing there and I knew I probably looked like hell; at least I felt that way.

I spoke first as I poured Mary a cup of coffee. "Mary, I want to know why all this happened. John knew how I felt about swinging. Did he set it up?"

"I'm so sorry, Helen. Tom told me that John was interested in swapping but I didn't know to what extent. I'm pissed at Tom for lying to me. He told me that you were interested in trying it so of course I'm into it and went along. I had no idea till I came back to the room that he had drugged you and was using you. It was too late to do anything about it then."

"So John did set it up? You did have sex with him, didn't you?" I asked.

"John wanted to involve you with possible swapping but told Tom that if you said no, to forget about it. Yes, I fucked John. Tom told me to give him some sleeping pills which I did. I'm so sorry. No one should have been forced. It's something a person should choose to do. As far as you and I are concerned, I really did want you. You knew that when we were in the room changing earlier."

"Mary, I've never told anyone this other than my girlfriends in college but I liked woman on woman sex and did it in college. It was experimenting and I did enjoy it then. Now I'm a married woman and a soon to be grandmother. I'm happy with a normal marriage and a normal relationship. To me, this was all wrong. If Tom wouldn't have drugged me I would have never consented to any of it.

"What does John know about last night. Does he know that I was drugged and used?" I asked.

"Tom told me that he wasn't going to say anything to John. He was going to leave it up to you to tell him whatever you want. To be honest with you, I wouldn't totally trust Tom. He's my husband but I'm beginning not to trust him myself. I don't like what he did to you. I want you to know that. If you ever want to talk or see me, here is my number." She handed me a piece of paper. "Again, I'm so sorry. Please forgive me," asked Mary.

She got up and left. I wasn't sure what to think. I actually liked Mary; I believe she just made some bad choices in life. She was just a pawn in Tom's game of chess. I wished her the best and told her I didn't hold any grudges against her. Now I had to decide what I would say to John. I decided to find out what he knew first and what he would admit to.

By the time John came back to the room I was cleaned up and dressed. He told me he went and had lunch but didn't figure I wanted to be bothered. I was sleeping like a baby. I told him Mary gave me a sleeping pill and said it would help with the hangover. Of course I lied to see John's reaction.

"What happened to you last night, John? I waited and waited for you to show up. When I came back to the room you had your pants off and were asleep on the bed." I knew he had to say something. This just might be interesting.

"Helen, I have something to tell you. Please don't hate me but I had sex with Mary last night."

"You what?" I yelled. "Why, John? I was waiting for you and you were busy fucking another woman?" I said. I was putting it on kind of strong.

"It just happened. I came to change my clothes and Mary knocked on the door. I was drunk and it just happened. I'm sorry. Mary actually approached me. I didn't know it but Tom and Mary do some swinging. Did Tom try anything with you?" asked John.

Here it was, time to say something. I decide to lie to John. I would be able to tell if he knew anything. "I went back to Tom and Mary's room. I was drunk and Tom began coming on to me. He was grabbing my ass and trying to kiss me. I think he gave me some kind of drug and I passed out. The next thing I knew Mary was there helping me up. My clothes were disheveled but I still had them on. If it wasn't for Mary, I'd have probably been raped by your friend.

"Mary gave me that pill to help me sleep and I came back to the room and took a shower and went to sleep. I feel like shit, I have a headache and my legs are killing me. I don't know what to do about our marriage. I told you there are always consequences for our actions."

"I'm sorry, Helen, it just happened. I promise to never do it again," replied John. "The next time I see Tom I'll tell him I want nothing to do with him. You have to believe me."

I did believe John told me all he knew. He told me about Mary and I lied about what happened to me. I felt bad but I hated what happened. If John is telling the truth then it is all over. I'll just keep my dark dirty secret for now.

We packed our things and headed for the airport. I didn't see anyone that I recognized from the party, thank God. I told John we would have to give it some time. I wasn't sure what I was going to do but I needed time. We hardly talked all the way home.

The first thing Monday I went to the doctors and got checked out. I was hoping that I didn't catch any diseases. My doctor told me it looked like I was raped and wanted to know if I wanted to report it.

I told her there was nothing to report. I was really embarrassed but I needed to get checked out. She told me that I was a little bruised and should refrain from sex for a couple of weeks. As far as STD's go she ran some tests and said I was clean for now but time would tell. She told me I needed to check back again in six months. If nothing showed up then that my chances were good that I was okay.

I stayed away from John. I told him I wanted nothing to do with him right then. I didn't tell him about the doctor or he would have asked why I needed the doctor. John was acting pretty decent. I guess Tom didn't tell him anything after all. I asked him if Tom had been in lately and he told me he was but that he was out at the time and didn't get a chance to tell him off.

About two months went by and things were pretty much back to normal. I decided to have sex with John. I had to realize that I had lied to him and it did bother me but what good would it have done to tell him the truth.

One night I asked John if he wanted to make love. I was in a really good mood. We were now grandparents. Angie our daughter had her baby. We had a grandson. John smiled and asked if he should take his Viagra tablet. I told him yes and I went in and pulled out one of the pills that I took from Tom's room. Mary had told me that Tom had given me two pills that awful night. I wanted to keep up with John so I took a half of a pill. I figured it would be enough to give me a tingle but not too much.

I was right and it felt good. John was happy that he was having sex and I was getting my tingle scratched. I climaxed twice that night. It seemed as though life was getting back to normal. Then one day John seemed to have changed.

We were making love and he was back to his old self, asking me about my past and asking me questions. "Do you want a black man?" "Ever been with a woman?" "I bet you'd love a gang bang."

I don't know what had gotten into him but I didn't like it. I told him to stop talking to me like that but I could feel him getting harder every time he asked me a question. It began to really bother me.

The next day I got a call at work; it was Mary. I hadn't talked to her since Atlantic City.

"Helen, I had to call you. There is something you should know. I just found out last night that Tom made a video of you the night you were in our room in Atlantic City. I'm so sorry; I really didn't know. I think he was in Ohio the other day and he might have given a copy to John."

"Oh, my God! That's why John has been acting funny lately - he knows. Mary, how can you live with such a bastard? I'll have to face John and probably end up in a divorce. I have to tell him exactly what happened, that I had no control over what was going on."

"Helen," said Mary, "I'm leaving Tom too. I can't live with a man that would do that to other people. I like sex and it was fine as long as it was in the open, but him doing this to you was wrong. I moved out this morning and saw a lawyer. I'm getting away from Tom; I can't live with a lying man anymore. I'm so sorry, Helen. Please believe me that I had nothing to do with it. I never saw the tape. I overheard Tom telling one of his friends on the phone."

I was becoming a wreck. I thanked Mary for telling me. She didn't have to do that. As I mentioned earlier, she just made some bad choices. Now I had to confront John. I wish I would have told him what his friend Tom did to me that night. Maybe it would have made a difference but I have my doubts.

I left work early and went home and began searching for the video. The only place we had a VCR was in the den at the house. I felt like a sneak going through John's personal stuff. I knew he kept a box of porno in the top of the closet in the den. It was his closet and I hardly ever went into it. In fact he kept it locked ever since the kids were little.

I went in the desk drawer and took out the key and opened the closet door. I took down the box and looked through it. Right on the side was a tape with nothing written on it. I popped it into the VCR and there I was being royally felt up. I could hear myself pleading with Tom to stop and he was laughing. It was the beginning of the video.

It brought back the horrible things that happened to me that night. I put it back into the closet and called John and told him I would be going over to Angie's afer work to see her and the baby. I told him I would be home late.

I did go to Angie's but I went early. I told her I wasn't feeling good so I left work early. Seeing my grandson and holding him was wonderful. This was suppose to be what families were about; not swapping and fucking every person you meet. I waited till I knew John would be home and headed to the house. I walked into the spare room and there was John watching the video of me being raped and was masturbating to the picture of me on the screen. He didn't hear me walk in.

"You mother fucking son-of-a-bitch," I yelled out.

John jumped holding his cock in his hand when he heard me. "You sure told Tom off, didn't you? I came home because I thought I needed to tell you about that night and how your good friend Tom took me, drugged me and then shared me with his friends. Since you've been watching the tape, I guess you know all that. You are one hopeless wimp cocksucker," I said.

He tried to recover by telling me I let it happen and didn't tell him about it. I reminded him that I kept it from him to save our marriage. If he remembered correctly, Tom didn't tell him about it and had him drugged while they used me. "What would you have done if I had told you? Pull out your cock and start jacking off while I told you how I was being used? You're one pathetic son of a bitch," I screamed at him.

I looked over his shoulder and saw myself crying on the tape. "Sure looks like I was enjoying myself, doesn't it?" At least with the smeared make-up and wig, no one would know it was me except for the people who were there and they really didn't know me either.

John tried to talk and explain but nothing was coming out right. He knew I was right and our marriage would be over. I told him he could sleep in the spare room and jack off to the remainder of the video. He might want to take a couple of his Viagra since it will last a few hours. Tomorrow I would call off work and find somewhere to live. He could have the house and most everything in it. I didn't want anything that he and his filthy hands had touched.

I went into our bedroom and cried. I had to let it all out. I had held it back for too long. I finally cried myself to sleep. When I awoke the next morning John had left for work. I called off and packed some of my personal things.

I called Angie and told her that her dad and I were getting a divorce. I tried to explain that he wanted his freedom to live his life and I gave it to him. She knew that we were on rocky ground for the last few years. I guess I was the only one that didn't see it coming.

Angie set up a room for me at her house. Her husband, Bill, was a real sweet man and treated Angie with respect. They were both there for me while I was trying to get things in order. Thank God for them and my grandson. I spent most of my free time with him.

We lived in a fifty-fifty divorce state if it is irreconcilable differences. John got everything and an appraiser went though and estimated the total value. John had to give me fifty percent of the value of our house and belongings. Our savings were divided equally also. We each had our own vehicle and decent jobs.

Mary called me and said she would testify for me if needed. I told John if he wanted to fight the divorce or the distribution of assets that Mary was in my corner. Our divorce went through in record time.

I found myself a nice apartment on the same block that Angie and Bill lived. It was a perfect place for me with two bedrooms. I was finally going on with my life. My son came and visited me when he was home from college. He stayed at the house with his dad since his stuff was already there.

About a month after the divorce I got another call from Mary. She said she needed to get away and asked if I would mind if she visited me. I invited her to stay for awhile and we became good friends. Her divorce was final and she told me she had enough of that life. She saw how it ruined marriages and didn't want any part of it anymore.

Mary didn't do as well as I did in her divorce. I guess even though Tom made good money he had a tendency to squander it all. Mary had told me at least she left the marriage without any debts even though she didn't have anything but her clothes.