All Comments on 'Lori Ch. 02'

Interesting sequel to the first story. For someone who was so angry at being cornered into taking money for sex, Lori seems to have discovered a new found enjoyment from the concept. Where will she go from here? I've enjoyed both the stories.

Lori seems more centered this time, which is nice to see. I would be careful with the dialogue..it sounds a little stilted in some places. People are more likely to say "I'll" than "I will" unless english is their second langauge.

Other than that, the story is progressing very well and I am interested to see where you will go with it, and whether she'll ask Brian to start paying her $200 an hour after he burns through the initial $6,000.00.

I do worry that, in the begining of Chapter 1, Brian seemed very grnuine about his interest. It seems like he took some time and care cultivating their 'relationship', but in this chapter he was disinterested. If he was feigning interest before to figure out how to manipulate her, I don't expect he would stop so abruptly. He'd want to keep stringing her along, even if they both knew better, I would think. manipulative people are always looking for new ways to manipulate. I don't think Brian's gotten all that he wanted, has he?

Thanks again for writing.