All Comments on 'Luck Ch. 11'

A long time coming and I enjoyed every bit of it. My onlu comment is that Taurus was her brother not step or half or otherwise. He was adopted and that's that. Just couldn't let that go -- sorry. I know too many adopted kids and once it done -- it's a done deal!!! No halfives. If you ever re-post or edit this story, that would be a nice change to see.

Thanks

Lakergirl

I KNEW YOU HAD IT IN YOU TO FINISH THIS STORY, ITS GREAT, NOW LETS GET I LOVE YOU AND THE OTHERS DONE, YEY

Lovely ending. I do agree with the other poster about the "stepbrother" title. Technically he isn't a stepbrother because he has no blood connection to either parent. Also, Star would have known Taurus as her brother from the moment she was born, so it wouldn't matter to her that he was adopted. He's just her big brother. Otherwise, this chapter was perfect.

O love reading your stories but don't take the story in that direction. It's just creepy and I don't know adopted kids that do that that haven't had some abuse of some kind that made them think that way. Kids are kids and if their parents treated them as their children, going off in the ditch like that would be bizzaro.

It's my business so perhaps you could just trust me on this. They can find love elsewhere and with a sibling is just ____ I'm sure you can feel me!!!!

Literary lic. is on you but I hope you reconsider. I'd hate to miss your future work. That's just over the imaginary line in the sand for me.

Thanks

Lakergirl

Loved it!!! But you don't need to go there with THAT storyline do you?

Looking forward to the next one (I think) =-0

It's so borderline. They're being raised as brother and sister. Legally, they are siblings. To me, that's still incest. I see where you are going with the connection and having a lifetime of shared memories and attraction(?) but it might be kind of strange. Hey, write what you want to write and I will at least read the first chapter to see if I like it :) Thanks for writing!

I enjoyed this from start to finish! You have a bright future ahead of you... The only thing I question is the redundancy of Star's name- Star Stark? I think if her name was Estrella (which means 'star' in Spanish), you still could have gotten the point across, that she was headed in a big direction, while keeping with the "zodiac themed" names. Good luck in the future!

Great ending to this story. I am glad that Laina allowed them to adopt her son. I have to agree with the other posts that legally they are brother and sister. Regardless of that they act like brother and sister. Thanks for a great read.

I'm sad to see your story end, but it was so good and one of my absolute favorites on the site. Did Mimi ever open up another restaurant or just a stay-at-home mom. You shouldn't do a follow up on Star and Taurus like that. You should do one story about how they fall in love with other people or I suggest you do one his friend Devlin. Just an idea. I hope you finish your other stories. Great job!

Glad Mimi and Aries got their happy ending. Lol at the prank Taurus and Star pulled on the reporters. Yeah, I think it's a good idea not to do a love story between the two of them since they're growing up as brother and sister. Looking forward to your future stories!

Please do another story for Taurus and/ or Star, I HAVE to know what happens to both of them (though I agree the sibling angle could be a bit wierd)

this is one of the few stories on Literotica where i am completely satisfied with the story. you tied up all the loose ends and gave us a glimpse to what happens after the "ever after" and love is settled into.

i would love to see devlin the lawyer meet his match. personally i see it as someone completely opposite than him. someone like a massage therapist, yoga person, someone who isn't all about the highly competitiveness of law.

great story! if you can't write something (sort-of?) incest, then i hope someone from the incest/taboo section (they are soo many) could pick-up on this story line, that is, if you'll allow it. :D

This story is so sweet and very well plotted.

You've definitely got talent, and I would really like to see some more stories from you.

So glad they wound up happy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Can't wait to read the sequels!!!!

will be finished next. Great job. Thanks for not writing a Starr/Tarus story. They are siblings and anything else would be creepy and ruin this great world you created.

yea. this stories ending was sweet and i enjoyed reading it. but do you think u could finish the story about jake&Jezebel

GORGEOUS! I LOVE IT, ALL THE WAY THRU SO MUCH LOVE & ACTION SO HOT!

great

What a lovely ending.

I loved this story from beginning to end! I couldn't stop reading if I wanted to. I loved that there was a perfect mix of drama, quality story line, and steamy, but romantic relations between the characters. There are so few good stories on this site and I'm really glad that I was fortunate to have discovered this one.

WHAT A GREAT LOVE STORY!

Having read your other two series, I knew to expect a story with characters to sink your teeth into (and bad editing) and you didn't disappoint. Bad editing aside, you write a wonderful story, I am hoping for more, especially an ending for I Love You. Keep on writing, you have a gift. I will happily volunteer to be your editor, just to read your work!

so fucking cute

cant wait for the next stories

and to tell more people about it

you brought the feeling of true love back

with a good mystery and it flows well i never got bored

… i just can stop smiling good ending as well

^^ 5 stars for sure

I agree with the commenter below about the editing, though. You/you're, then/than, definitely/defiantly, and other mistakes kept tripping me up while I was reading. It was a good enough story for me to keep reading in spite of those, though.

With some work, it could be even published. I've seen worse books on the market. Although some things, like him going on even when she said "no", that first time, could turn some people off.

'Worse books on the market' - gee thanks, Anonymous

Grammar errors aside, actually, they are mostly spelling errors, you tell a good story. Rushy at the end but a great look at the future - A book that could be shopped around even outside the Romance genre and into the more lucrative mystery/suspense for wider appeal.

Overall, nice job, grab a friend or an editor and you'll go places!

Airdrie

Glad to see that it all worked out for everyones good; despite the homophones being off. Good story :>)

Or honey in this case. Lovely touch. It had me laughing. Execellent story loved it from beinging to end.

I love how you ended this story, red. It was a light and happy ending to a delightful tale. The prank Star and Taurus pulled on the press was hilarious and charming!! Even if it was a little cruel to the tabloids, the sure as hell deserved it XD

you find it or make it or accept it as fate. TK U MLJ LV NV

Honey-

Thank you for wrapping this tale up so very nicely. For all the drama at the beginning the ending was very well and neatly tied up. All that deserved their just due got it and righteously.

Probably the best story I've read!

You have a real talent for story telling.

I love love love love LOVE this story!! From chapter 1 I was drawn in! Thank you for the amazing read, and the heart warming story. I honestly didn't see a happy ending, but somehow, you managed. Its pieces like this that give me hope on my dream to be a writer. Thank you! You are just fucking amazing!!

You should do a sequel about the kids and how their life is going to be when their older

Does luck have any thing to do with finding true love? I hope not but I will tell you this was a wonderful story.

amazing story

The story was good...but the ending was so sappy sweet it gave me a tooth ache.

best story ever

I read your story in two days and this was the best yet!!! Kept me on my toes. And usually I can figure a story out before the end and I get bored; this was not one! Great, great plot! Beautiful imagery, wonderful sex and erotic parts! Loved it!!!

One of the best stories on the site and it had an ending so rare

I loved reading all of your stories.

F-ING FLAWLESS!

I couldn't drop this damn story and went through all 11 chapters in one sitting. Now it's 3 am and i have to get up in 4 hours to go to work. Great story but just - just - evil!

The concept was interesting, but you are very naive about this sort of mystery writing. Aries left town with nothing but some pocket money and a credit card. How could he have access to an almost endless supply of money without using a credit card or contacting his bank, which would have given away the fact that he was alive. One of the first things cops do in a case like this is to trace the activity of bank accounts. He would have had to use his real name to buy the restaurant, get insurance on it, and pay the taxes. He would have also had to register himself and all employees with the IRS. Those, and a few hundred other things just can't be done without proper identification.

Samples of his DNA would have been readily available to compare with the murder victim. That would have proven the murder victim wasn't Aries - easy, and one of the first things that would have been checked to confirm the identity.

Besides all the technical goofs, your use of the English language is deplorable. You don't know the difference between," then/than, me/I, he/him, she/her" nor any of the other pronouns. You also don't know the difference between "their, there, and they're". ("Their" is the possessive form of "they." "There" is anywhere other than "here." And "they're" is a contraction of "they are.") You desperately need a good editor, who would correct a bunch of grammar blunders, and make you rewrite the parts that don't make any sense due to mistakes in the details, omissions, or ignorance. Cops aren't usually the brightest bulbs in the lamps, but they aren't nearly as ignorant as you are about police work.

I enjoyed it for a while, but the sheer ignorance of the characters (author) finally just got to be too much. Oh, yeah, that's another thing you don't know - the difference between "to and too". You seem to have good story ideas - well, at least this one - you just mess up the details. I finally got annoyed enough I had to quit reading at about Ch. 4.

Guess I'll just have to find another author - and you need to find a good editor!

(By the way, I post as Anonymous because I dislike providing any unnecessary personal information on ANY site - even my name.)

could offer an opinion - nah, I just didn't stop reading! I liked it..good job. Scotty

Is it "to" or "too", "their" or "they're", "exude" or "exhume", etc., etc. ??? A proofreader or editor might know!

What the hell, it was a good story...FIVE STARS!

would be a complete and utter lie. That was hands down the best series I've found in this website so far. You are extremely talented as a writer, but seriously dude, get an editor. Confusing "you're" with "your"? Those are rookie mistakes.

the story is wonderful, the sex hot!.....it got me visiting many emotions

thanks for writing this.