All Comments on 'Michael Returns to College Pt. 02'

This is a very well written, thoughtful story, deserving of far more attention than it seems to have gotten. I especially liked the "Ethics of Mind Control" concept, which reminded me a little of Asimov's three Laws of Robotics. Power used with responsibility is one of my favorite themes, and this story demonstrates the concept extremely well.

It's possible that this story would have gotten more attention if the MC element had been dropped and it were placed in the Romance section of Lit. But in doing so, it wouldn't have been the same story, so I'm glad you did it this way. I haven't read the rest of your stories yet, but if they're all as good as this, you've gained a fan.

I am an English Professor and your work was very welldone. The reading of the story made me feel like I was a part of the story line. In actual fact I found the story to be very moving and touch my heart with the profound love displayed by your submission. Congradulations on a well produced product.

What a beautiful insight in the characters, they are real people. Very well written and I hope this is not the end of the story. Keep up the good work.

enjoyable story, just one thing I noticed that interupted my reading. Too many exclamation marks, they were almost always unessasery and left me wondering part way throught the story what their purpose was. Anyway, its not a big problem, and Like i said I realy enjoyed the story. Keep it up!

Yeah, that's how I feel. I'm humbled by the variety and thoughtfulnesss of the comments.

As for the exclamation points . . . this was one of my earlier works, and I got kinda caught up in the comic book mode where everything has an exclimation point. Sorry. My works since them are somewhat more subdued (although I still LOVE to use the elipses, as you can see).

The 'ethics of mind control' concept probably originated with Asimov's "Three laws of robotics", but I was (and still am) frequently disturbed by the 'mind control' stories on the internet where the person with 'the power' rides rough-shod over his victim, with no concern for her or the damage and havoc he's probably causing. I also have a recollection that there was some other source for the 'ethics' . . . probably another story . . . but I can't remember.

And, yes, a moral of these stories might be, 'with great power comes even greater responsibility'. (Responsibility and committment seem to be lost virtues in the 21st century.)

By the way, I had planned on a part 3 of this story, but inadvertantly the leading lady of 'Part 3' became the 'Virgin Bride'.

There are two or three more 'Michael' stories floating around the net . . . if you are interested.

In any case, thanks, everyone, for your comments and thoughts.

Barnabus

barnabus329@hotmail.com

I loved the approach. It was sex with feeling.

This is one of the most well-told stories I've read in some time.

I can relate to Michael & his philosophy. The woman who is now my wife, once told me that one of the things she liked best about me was that I was "gentle with her soul" unlike anyone else had been before.

That goes hand-in-hand with being a gentleman.

Something increasingly lacking in many people over the past 50+ years.

Thank you for writing this.

I agree with the gentle men above on how many like this kind of love, only thing i saw a bit off was you changed the view of it from first person to third person views of the story other wise excellent story

I'd read this story before but couldn't remember until I reached the bottom of the first page. I couldn't stop and had to read the whole thing again!

I like the philosophy he had regarding his powers, very noble. Even without powers if the world would treat each other with the same respect, it would be such a great place to live.

This is a story that could continue on for many chapters and many more experiences. Not trying to ruin a good thing, but the possibility of Joeve not being able to handle the "mind tricks" and running from him sending him into a dark period where he uses his abilities with a decadent flourish and then rebounding back with another "true" love, lots of potential there. Maybe I've just been reading too much of the darker stuff, I don't know.

It's a great story and like I said, I enjoyed it just as much the second time!

It begs for several more chapters.

Snore...

It was fun, for a moment, to be reminded of my own youthful fascination with the mechanics of a bra strap. Otherwise, it was a nice middle of the story. The beginning was presented in such a way that I felt the author saying "yeah, yeah; that's why, now here's the stroker part." The ending never happened, we were left at the door of the hospital without hearing her reaction to the big reveal after hearing her reactions to everything else in the story.

Oh well; maybe there will someday be a rewrite and extension of the story. I look forward to that.

some good moments but generally unfocused, unsatisfying and inconclusive ...even the title has little to do with the story