All Comments on 'Mollie Buys a Brothel'

Awesome concept. I would be very interested to see where this story goes!!!

Great background for a longer series of stories. I actually own 3 businesses and I like the realism in the business end of your characters. Please read my business related story about "Gobbles Blowjob Bar Franchise" http://www.literotica.com/s/gobbles-blowjob-bar-franchise - claud137

Imaginative, intelligent.

The dialog is not terrible, and dialog is hard to write.

The character development could be better. i know space is short. But people are complex, nuanced, and from reading other stories, I get the feeling this is one of the things literotica writers find most difficult to portray.

I'm not a great writer, so I'm not sure i can help you too much there. But i am a skilled reader.

But i do notice that exposition is a terrible way to develop character, and you seem to know that, too.

For instance, I really liked the section where Mollie makes her counter offer for the brothel. And in this story, I think your neutral observer/narrator Nick Carraway type perspective works very well

So good luck to you. I think this is a smarter, more interesting effort than most others.