My Father-in-Law Ch. 3

"I might do that, take a few days off, that is." I replied. "I'm going to go take a shower and go to bed. I don't want to think. I think I got a bottle of gin, yes. I have a bottle of gin and I got some tonic water. I'm going to take a long hot shower, pour a gigantic drink, and go to bed. My mind is spinning." I said in a monotone. I gave my father-in-law a chaste kiss on the cheek and walked away to the bathroom.

I awoke at noon. Steven had already gone to work. At 1P.M. the phone rang.

"Arna." It was Steve, husband.

"I don't want to talk to you. Oh...how could you!" I shouted into the phone and hung up.

I sunk to my bed and cried. The phone rang again. I answered it.

"Arna...please don't hang up. I need to see you and talk. If after I'm done talking and you still don't want to see me anymore, I'll understand." He paused waiting for my answer.

"I don't know what you could possibly say to me. After several months of you ignoring me, I come home to our house, and find you and your sister screwing in my bedroom. Gee...how can you possibly justify that Steve? Answer me!" I screamed into the phone.

He remained silent for several moments.

"Arna...I...I can't. But I do love you. Please...meet me. Please?" He sounded insistent.

"Where?" I asked.

"At home. Susan will be here also. We both need to talk to you. As soon as you can."

"Let me get dressed. I'll be over in half an hour." I said and hung up the phone.

Steve answered the door and I saw Susan sitting in an arm chair in my front room. She couldn't look at me. Steve took the sweater I was wearing and hung it up in the front closet.

"Arna...I'm very sorry that you saw what you did. I'm ashamed." Steve said.

"Yes you both should be." I retorted.

"Arna...don't be so quick to judge us. Not until you understand the whole story." Susan said, slightly defiant.

I sat on the couch. Steve sat at the other end.

"Susie you begin." Steve said.

"All right, I will." Susan said. She took a deep breath and closed her eyes as she began to speak.

"Shortly after mommy died, Stevie was devastated. No...we all were. Our mother was a sweet, gentle and very loving mother. Daddy was a wreak, emotionally. But Stevie took it the hardest. Every night I could hear him sobbing quietly in his room. I needed comfort also. So I went into his room and we talked and tried to help each other as best as we could. About three months after mommy died, Stevie got into a car crash."

"I tried to kill myself." Steve interrupted.

"Yes. I was at the hospital every day to be with him. He was 19 and I was 21. Daddy's business was suffering. He almost lost it. Anyway, I spent a lot of time after Stevie was released from the hospital nursing Stevie back to health. I would spent the first hour each evening after he went asleep, watching over him. He is my little brother and we have always been very close. Our whole family has been close. He was bedridden for 6 whole months. During this time I had to devise some way to keep him from trying to kill himself again. The method I chose, although it may have been wrong, was to sleep with my own brother. But you must understand, he was still fragile, mentally and emotionally." Susan paused and looked at me for the first time since I arrived.

"Arna...I know it was wrong. But I...we had just lost our mother. She was only 38 years old! I didn't want to lose my brother also! God...these are two of the three people I love most! Stevie, while he was bedridden, told me flat out that he was going to succeed the next time. He meant it." Susan's voice was beginning to choke up. This wasn't easy for her.

"So," she continued, "One night, while daddy was on a business trip, I decided to put my plan into action. Stevie never went outside. He remained in his room all of the time. I went in to talk to him and at first he wasn't very responsive. He wouldn't even acknowledge that I was there. I sat next to him and held his head and just talked softly to him. I told him that I loved him and that I would do anything to help him out of his depression. I forgot to mention that it was summer and I was wearing a two piece bathing suit. I had to try to get him out of that deep depression. At first he just cried, very quietly to himself. Then his hand touched my hand. I was cradeling his head in both of my arms. Arna, he was really pitiful. I had to try to save his life. I did. Finally he responded. He told me he loved me and that was the first time we ever slept together. It wasn't the last. I guess you figured that out."

I let Susan's words sink in. No one had ever told me about Steve's depression. Probably because of the aftermath.

"I'm sorry. But that still doesn't justify you and Steve continuing that relationship." I said.

"No it doesn't. Except that it was I who was contemplating suicide after Dale divorced me. Stevie was there for me. It was me who was to blame and is to blame both times. Arna...Stevie loves you. He got that operation so that you could start that family that you both want. When you came home yesterday, I was really upset. I do not have enough money to keep my condo and I came over here bawling. Stevie tried to calm me down and find out what the matter was. After he found out, it was I who initiated the lovemaking. I guess that you two have not been too initimate lately and I caught him when he was at his weakest. You must understand, I love my family. It was a part of my mother's legacy, so to speak. I would have done the same thing if it was my father.

Unfortunately, I got pregnant. I had met Dale while I was going to college. I stayed at home to be with Stevie and daddy. I was the woman of the house. At first, I thought that Dale was the father. That is until only a few months ago. Kyle had an infection of the sinuses and Dale brought him in. Something didn't click with the doctor and tests were done. Eventually a DNA profile was done by Dale and the truth was found out. That's why I went off the deep end." Susan said. By now she was starting to cry as she spoke.

It was hard for me to listen to this and not be affected by what I was being told. I knew I had to speak up.