All Comments on 'Not Your Typical Night at the Movie'

I absolutely HATE stories presented in the First Person Singular perspective! It is the laziest, crudest (in the worst way possible), most dispassionate way of narrating there is. You might as well be describing how puss oozes out of an open, festering sore. Nothing at all to like; no entertainment effect or value, no impact except nausea and a definite deflation of libido.

Get an education on how to write a story; then get yourself a seriously good editor; then listen to them!

Otherwise, throw all your crayons away and just type sitcoms.