All Comments on 'Poison'

always faithful ........nice one.....5 stars

But those bosomy redheaded locomotives got a way of freezing an otherwise rightthinkin' man's feet straddled to the railroad tracks. My main complaint is that this one ain't over yet till SHE comes back and tries to reclaim Mike and the money in the floor safe. I'm giving you five stars for this one AND the sequel that is crying to be written. Don't lemme down Bro'.

Really kind of a rambling story. Did he finally divorce Patty?

Some of the elements remind me of things over fifty years in the past.

I really do not know why Kathleen puts up with him, but liked reading the story....

As one commenter said, the story had the feel of a story from an earlier time. That was only one of the things I liked about it. The characters, and the description of the events were believable, and very good. Especially the part where one brother thought that Patty was beautiful and the other could see right away that she was a skank. I've seen that happen too many times in real life. Plus I have a weakness for redheads. Someone below said he could see it coming a mile away. Great, but we usually know where we're going, it's how we get there that matters and the way you took us there was masterful. Great job as usual. SS06

why is the author going OUT of this way to make Mike sucha weak faggot pussy loser?

There was 1 last mistake.... which was the time any reader spent reading this vile crap. One line sums up this silly over the top waste of time

"Patty, I don't think...."

What we have here is a story of a truly stupid man without a clue.

Every other line is " that was Mike's next mistake". His stupidity is so overpowering that readers end up HOPING Patty fucks him over.

and in the end she does. I feel sorry for Kathleen...whhen she finds out what sort of fucking idiot mike is...

The character named "Patty" is a real person, the description of her is fairly accurate. So is the character Sara.

Greedy, self serving, manipulative, with the ability to tie a man into knots.

Like the title...poison.

Some of those scenarios are truth, the sad part is she got away with it, since the alternative would have put me in jail.

Stupid? Yep. But three very long months married to that woman was quite enough to create an education. The hard part is the real truth being she got away with it.

Give a female like that a check guarantee card and see how much damage she can do.

I am an old man now, all of that is just a memory. Deep down inside, well over three decades later..?

Just memories.

Like always, I hope some enjoy my work.

MGM

A bit weird, definitely unusual. But overall, a very nice piece of fiction. five-star!

I can't say that this story could not happen, but BOY what a dunce. A person like this must beat their fingers with hammers for fun.

.....sizzle sizzle sizzle....this is your brain on drugs. Directed at the characters, not the author.

1) Characters are either evil, stupid, inept, or certifiable;

2) Author cannot distinguish between a comma and a period;

3) Author cannot distinguish between "its" and "it's";

4)

Oh, fuck it. Too many things wrong.

Seriously, man, learn to write. This one almost had a chance of not blowing.

Good writing but I just could NOT get into the story because of how damn STUPID you made Mike. About 50% less stupid for him and for Kathleen and this would have been a great story. You made Kathleen too stupid for her own good also. Oh, well, I am sure a lot of my stories aren't for everyone either. You are a good writer Magmaman and I like a large percentage of your works. Keep it up.

from stupidity to nirvanaa with several hiccups along the way and then happiness. (for some) TK U MLJ LV NV

Good writing but too far fetched. Too many impossibilities for one story.

It started out like a great story. But then it went down hill in neutral. Even if it was an autobiography, Mike (or MMM) was as dumb as a sack of rocks. There are very dumb guys around ever corner, but I just don't enjoy reading about them.

Too bad this one is a waste of the reader's time. MMM is capable of much better.

Yeah, Mike was a moron. I wonder how he managed to work on cars with his head so far up his ass. Must have been hard to find the right tools. It's lucky his car is loud, it lets people know a dope is approaching and they can get out of the way. I realize people do exist like Mike and people like Patty who will take advantage of them. But, as I have stated, I'm not sure how interesting they are to read about. The first time someone stumbles into a door frame, it's a chuckle. After the tenth time, it's not. This story was definitely headed in that direction. <br><br>

And then he is saved, not through his own actions but by his vastly wiser brother. If going to war improves people this much we should make it mandatory for everyone. <br><br>

Cleaning house of Patty and her loser friends was entertaining. Was the money left by his brother? The indication was it was drug money but how did Patty find the safe to put it in when the cops didn't? She wasn't that enterprising or smart. On the other hand I'd be surprised if his brother would reward him for being a moron. Most of the money probably went into repairs and bills left from Patty. <br><br>

The ending was a bit of a fairy tale that Mike didn't deserve. I hope Kathleen doesn't regret her choice. She's a lot smarter than Mike though, so things will probably work out. Decent writing and a kickass ending rescue the story.

How can a grown woman fall for a 14 year old living in a man's body? I feel sorry for Kathleen!

Some guys are exactly as dumb at that! They must be led to water and then tube fed anyway.

Of your best. Thanks for sharing looking forward to you next submission.

My god man did you not read this story before releasing it, it is horrible and makes you look pretty stupid oh well to each our own glad i'm not you.

I am seriously getting tired of reading rants by Anonymous. Its easy to be an ass when there is no accountability.

Good story with a different plot. Love (strong lust) sometimes works that way. Always like your stories.

He looked after his sibling...no matter what. Great story. No one got hurt, killed or maimed! Just had the crap scared outta them. Well Done!!

Anonymous doesn't mean afraid...it means to lazy to get an account.

I think those who claim they'd never be caught with their pants down, are either insecure individuals, who constantly spy on their spouses, or are living in fantasy land. Love is truly blind and men (some women too) are willing to overlook what they shouldn't. After all who wants to believe, much less admit, they've become a unwitting cuckold.

Catching a cheating spouse, unless they're blatant about it, is, unlike fictional stories, a difficult thing to do for the average person. Also, as so many stories have shown, not all suspicious behavior is indicative of cheating. And a private investigation service is not cheap; as an example, a two week investigation can cost upwards of $9,000.00. As far as placing bugging devices in a home...Yes, that can be easily done for a substantial cash layout, but if a spouse is cheating away from home, then it falls back to the P.I. to ferret that out.

Either way, unless a person has plenty of money to spend on having someone watched periodically, most cuckolds will remain in the dark. No matter how bitterly we complain about the unfairness of things, or how we claim we would catch a cheating spouse, the truth is, most of us are stuck in blissful ignorance and blind stupidity.

JLRemora

Really smart people are no fun when telling stories about them. It is the dumb ones, the morons, the ones who make mistakes and then compound them that can really get their teat into a wringer, and that can be a kick.

I admit that in my twenties, I was pretty stupid when it came to females. I tended to head directly towards whatever one my.."pointer" pointed at, without fail...LoL.

Just like MOST of you other men. Young women figure out very quickly that a twitch of the ass and a bit of bare tittie can get them lots of stuff.

Do we men bite? Oh yes we do. A scenario like I wrote couldn't happen? Wanna bet? Most of it did, hell, I even used Patty and Sara's real names! Well, there was no attack and flash grenades, that was just something I very much would have liked to do....:)

The only reason Patty didn't get the TV set and the beanbag chairs is because they wouldn't fit into the fucking trailor!

Now, some 30+ years later, I look back and wonder how in the hell did I ever fall for some of that crap? Easy to think that, with silver hair and wrinkles young females don't even try and tease me much any more.

In fact, THEY hold doors open for ME now, and call me "sir."

But there was one gal named Debs, I saw the signs and my pointer led the way. Got married to her. If she had wanted to get me, she could have, but sometimes a man gets lucky. I wrote a few stories about that, too.

As always, I hope some of you enjoy them.

Thanks,

MGM

Seemed realistic to me. Poison. Some readers are not happy because the guy had his head screwed up by a woman. We have all witnessed it at one time or another. I have warned several friends of a females reputation and have been warned myself. Thats all you can do. Warning them will not help if they see a lighted halo above the broads head. Two of the guys I warned married them. Yes, it turned out badly. They believed that the other person would change for them. Everyone could see the direction it was headed but them. One of them was a coke whore, but the guy could only see the halo. Unlike the character in the story he knew before hand. For some the light shines from between the womans legs. They marry the first one that they get into and think it's love. Maybe it should have a warning label.

My first love after returning to the states from 'Nam was a very hot "fuck you to tears" redhead. I wish only the best for her. I hope she's a crack whore pulling trains on skid row at a quarter a pop.

I liked the story and know how stupid a man can get for the "right" (meaning wrong) woman. Right there with you MMM.

I hear you, MGM.

I don't write loving/cheating spouse stories, but I do enjoy reading them --especially when I sense a modicum of reality within them.

The instructors, in some of the writing courses I took, stressed writing about what a person is familiar with. And, one's life experiences can be very heady toxic stuff, often making for a great story line.

Having been married and divorced thrice to three very conniving women, it's not hard to visualize the emotionally violent acts that are the results of catching a cheating spouse. Like you, if I ever do write a story about a cheating wife I would have to base it on my own experiences. I'm not sure I want to go down that road as getting off that road was a very painful and arduous process.

Anyway, I enjoy reading your stories, so keep them coming.

JLRemora

Your stores usually flow well and the characters interesting. This one was similar. However, I never noticed so many comma faults in your stories before. Did I just miss them? Hard to believe because they were everywhere in this one and impossible to miss. I don't think I've read many stores with as many punctuation mistakes as this one -- mostly two sentences strung together with a comma instead of a period or a semicolon.

Oops! I meant full of shit. Hell, I thought it was a great story and a helluva lot of fun. Definitely Five Stars!

Most probably gig not get quite that fucked up while being there -

Nice he had a good support system to help him out of there -

Why did he keep trying to set his wife's friends up with an immature jerk like Mike. Now I see he's an even bigger jerk.

Why would a mature smart woman like Kathleen have anything to do with a bonehead like Mike after he shit on her?

thinking with his little pecker and treating the one real good woman like shit...but then we had Rambo to sort it all out.....can never imagine that happening...would bring half the bloody army down on them as they acted like terrorists.....but I suppose it worked out as the girl he dumped came back to him...not sure why as he didn't deserve her...I suppose love conquers all....or does it????

Like Mike really exst? Surely nobody can be that brain-dead and still functional? Humanity can't have regressed that much can it?

Should have listened to his brother all along.

Why would Kathleen even want some one like Mike. This is the kind of slut bait Peter Pan who is always going to prefer trash over substance.

This story was his own fault. She was a druggie and cheat when they met, while they dated and after the marriage. He should have used her all he wanted (using double rubbers to be sure) and then said adios and forgot about her. A leopard very very rarely changes spots. He was the ultimate cause of his own pain.

Thanks for the story.

versus the plain old chocolate bar. TK U MLJ LV NV

I hate long grass!...Cutting it is a pain in the ass!....Story is Good but not Great!

I Think Judges are corrupt!... Also 99% of the time You find out He's been screwing the Sad Sacks Missus!.....So He Screws Her..Judge Screws You.... Her Lawyers Screw Her!.. Then Screw you!...The Bank Manager Screwed Her!...Then Screwed You

FUCK MAN YOU ARE SCREWED!.......Here's The Kicker If you get sent to jail Big Bubba will Screw You!.............Anyway that's my Comment 5 ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ WOOF!

I really liked your story. I have known women like Patty and Sara. Fortunately not for long.

... he’ll drop Kathleen again, is my guess. Now, if, of his own free will and not brother’s goading, he falls in love with Kathleen, ESPECIALLY if she is pregnant, he will be safe from Patty’s machinations.

Not a story that reached out to me in any way. 3-stars.

I understand the type of guy who hangs in there too long, but I root for them when they finally turn away.

NOT GOOD - NOT BAD - AVERAGE. Straightforward plot. It was pretty obvious the shooting up had been arranged by his brother and the ending was also obvious. But different, in a good way, from much of what appears in this category. I think in real life there’s many men who’ve been taken for a ride by that type of women. All men, at some time, have been lead by their penis by an attractive woman and I’m no exception.

Really good story.. Mike wasn't dumb

Many of us have been him

Can you spell DUMBASS? That little 31 year old going on 17 prick isn't good enough to lick Kathleen's shoes.

It's a story about a pathetic 31 year old man child that we are some how supposed to root for. Fuck no.

And Sunny, most men are no where near this asshole and they never were.

You gave us no reason to care about anyone in the story. Just one big “meh”. Poorly written.

is this a repeat?

What the heck crap did I just read, pity there is no minus to rate this.

kirei8 has said all that's needed

ok start, now it just needs an ending.