Queen of Pain

"This is not good. This is something dark. We must protect ourselves if we are going to meet this woman or whatever she is. In the morning I will go to someone who can help us."

Pulling the blanket back over her, she told Alex that it was best they get some sleep. They would need their strength.

~ ~ ~

Lena found a woman, a Boszorkány or witch, to offer them a protection spell. She gave them some stones from the area that would help to guide them. Using an infusion of incense and oils she anointed them and cleansed them. Taking Alex's face in her hands she looked hard into her dark eyes.

"You think with your head at all time . . . but within you I see passion of gypsy . . . deep feel for love . . . and much sorrow. This time . . . you must seek what you want with your heart . . . but be warned . . . things will not be what you think . . . the dark one can give you what you desire but everything comes at a price."

They climbed the mountain path in silence. Lena led the way, finding hidden traces of long forgotten symbols and cairns. Alex's desire to study the symbols began to wane as they took to a more treacherous pathway. Both women supported one another as they climbed over the rocky terrain before heading into a deeper, darker section of the forest. Alex was at the point of exhaustion when Lena cried out that they had arrived.

Alex pushed her way through the brush and before her, stood a temple ruin hidden by the forest growth. It was large and made of stone and carved wood. Lena was already at the top of the stairway that led to a large wooden door. On the door was carved a likeness of the amulet.

Lena waited for Alex to meet her and pulled a flashlight out of her knapsack. It took both of them to push the door open enough to step inside.

They were met with the smell of rich earth and spices, not the usually dust and decay that Alex was used to when opening a crypt or other ancient find. Following the light of Lena's flashlight, they carefully crept along a hallway. It seemed to be impossibly long. Alex was unable to make out the carvings that adorned the walls. Something skittered in front of them - probably a rat, thought Alex.

They found themselves before a large door, secured by a sword. Lifting the heavy sword, they pushed the door open. Inside was a larger chamber, the heart of the temple. Torches were lit against the walls and the brightness of the room made them cover their eyes.

When her eyes adjusted to the light, Alex could see statues of people in various stages of torment. Murals on the walls depicted scenes of men and women writhing in pain. Some were physically being tortured, some were mentally tortured by unseen demons and others were afflicted with wounds of the heart. At the far end of the room, was the altar curiously adorned with fresh flowers and fruit. Swaths of beautifully rich fabric draped from the ceilings, hanging down, curtaining a throne of highly polished stone and covered in animal skins.

Alex watched as Lena approached the altar and took a box from her knapsack. Lena knelt in front of the throne, holding the box above her bowed head. The fabrics began to move and from behind them, appeared the Queen of Pain, dressed in a crimson robe, the amulet brightly displayed at her neck.

Alex moved slowly towards the altar, and watched as the Queen opened the box and took the scroll out. She nodded to Lena and motioned for her to rise up on her feet.

Lena obeyed and then proceeded to undress. Alex could see the rectangular patch of skin missing from Lena's back. It was the length of the scroll. The woman unrolled the scroll and replaced the skin on Lena's back. She then placed her hands on Lena's head.

"You have served me well. You may go now. What you asked for has been promised."

Lena bowed low and kissed the woman's hand. Tearfully she turned to Alex as she began to put on her clothes.

"It was nothing against you, Alex. My family has been afflicted with an illness for many years and she was my only chance to stop it before it went any further. I am sorry for my deception, but I could not see my family suffer any longer."

She stopped and stood next to Alex, placing her hand on her friends arm and tried to speak. She could find no words that would make sense. Lena knew Alex felt deceived and would not understand her desperation. Giving her arm a squeeze she left the temple as quietly and as quickly as she could.

Alex stood silently, trying to make sense of what was happening. She watched as the Queen made herself comfortable on her throne.

"Do not be upset with her, Alexandra. She only paid the price for what she asked of me. The decision was not easy for her, for she has great respect for you."

"So now you have me here and you can sit there smugly having what you desire. What happens to me now?"

"Are you afraid of me now, Alexandra? You seemed so pleased with me when you first discovered me. I was going to be the find of the century - the discovery that would have given you the admiration and respect among your peers that you so desired. I gave you all the clues and all the means necessary to find me and now you stand here afraid of me?"

"What are you talking about?"

"Did you ever wonder why you never saw your benefactor? Did you ever wonder why so much information became so easy for you to acquire when no one had ever heard of me before in your community?"

The woman stepped down from her throne and went over to the altar. She selected some grapes and put one in her mouth.

"You must be hungry after your long trip. Have something to eat."

Alex moved closer to the altar, keeping a distance between her and the woman.

"Why me?"

The woman picked up a large carafe and poured two glasses of wine and handed one to Alex across the altar. Alex reluctantly took it.

"Don't worry, it's not poisonous, I promise." She took a sip herself, to prove her point. "As to your question . . . because you are my heir."

"Your heir? What do you mean by that?"

The Queen sat down on a large cushion near her throne and patted the one next to her for Alex to sit on.

"Come Alexandra, sit near me. Eat and drink with me and I will answer all your questions. It's going to be a long night."

Alex grudgingly moved next to the Queen, still keeping a distance from her. She took a sip of the wine, finding it sweet and calming.

"I am not here to harm you, Alexandra. My title may seem to indicate otherwise, but I assure you - I am not one to bring about pain, but to relieve it."

She took a piece of bread, spread a white substance onto it and handed it to Alex.

"Try this, its ewe's cheese. It is particularly good when drinking tokaji. "

Alex took the bread from the Queen, sniffing it first and then tasting it. It was spicy and creamy and delicious. She found that she was hungrier than she had thought and accepted another piece from the Queen.

"I love the cuisine of Hungary - such a blending of flavours, don't you think? This was always my favourite temple. Lena's family worshipped me for many years until the sickness invaded them. Her great, great, great grandfather would bring me his homemade palinka - a delightful aperitif."

"How is it that you can eat if you're . . .?"

"Dead?" she laughed, "I'm only dead inside, for I have no soul. I lack the capacity of having emotional ties to nourish my spirit. I can only nourish my body, though it is not really necessary."

"Tell me how it is that I am your heir."

The Queen licked her fingers and took another sip of her wine.

"You and I are alike, Alexandra. I too, desire knowledge. When my mother was murdered by the Villagers, I thought I had no more family. I knew nothing of my father, except that he was a soldier for the King and was killed in some remote battle. I was to find out many years later, when I became what I am now, that my mother had a sister. She lived with her family in a remote village on the other side of the mountains. I learnt she had a large family and as the years passed I kept track of them until finally, I found you. You are the last in line of our family."

"So you set up this elaborate ruse to find me?"

"If I had come to you the way I am now, would you have accepted it? I have watched you, followed your works, and studied you. You need proof - something tangible, something you can research and find answers to yourself. You were always seeking."

Alex looked around the temple room. She saw the depictions of pain in the statues and murals. Centuries of human anguish surrounded her. She needed more wine.

"It's beautiful, is it not? A glorious dedication to me and what I have achieved."

"Beautiful? How can you say that?! Look at these people and the suffering they endured. It's horrifying!"

The woman poured them both another glass of wine and smiled at Alex.

"You are looking, but not seeing. This . . ." she waved her hand around the room, "This is what I have taken from them and placed upon myself. I was the one that tolerated the torture. I was the one that felt the blade of the sword, the burning at the stake, the anguish of losing a loved one through death, the humiliation of rape. I have felt every bit of what they would have felt."

She rose from her seat and placed her hand over a candle on the altar. Alex watched as the flesh started to blister, and bleed as skin burnt away.

"Stop it!" Alex screamed as she ran to the woman and pushed the candle away.

"I cannot feel it, Alexandra because it is mine. I can only feel the pain of others."

Alex looked to see that the Queen's hand was just as it was, healed and intact. Holding the woman's hand in hers she could feel it was cold.

Now..." said the Queen of Pain in a slow, commanding voice. "I have shared with you my story." Indulge me with your own..."

Alex obliged.

~ ~ ~

"Go ahead and ask me . . . ask me what your Sam felt, as she lay dying on the mountain." The woman gripped Alex's wrist and held her fast.

Alex tried to pull away, but the Queen spun her around and held her arm behind her back. She felt a cold breath against her ear as the Queen spoke.

"You told me to take care of her and I did. I told her to give it to me, give me all her pain and I would release her of this mortal plane. Do you know what I felt from her Alexandra?"

"No . . ."

"I didn't feel the pain from her body. I felt the pain from her heart."

"Please don't . . ."

"Her last thoughts were of you. I felt her loss, knowing she could never hold you again. I felt her grief, knowing she was leaving you. I saw all her memories of you and the tenderness and the guilt. I felt the bittersweet reluctance of her inability to say goodbye to you. Of all the pains I have endured, the most wrenching torturous pain is the pain of human love that is torn from the soul. Unrequited love is insufferable. Even to me."

"I loved her."

"You never said the words."

The Queen released Alex and returned to her throne. Alex stood weeping from the pain in her heart, and the pain from her wrist.

"You never give of yourself, Alexandra. You refuse to give freely, trying to spare yourself the hurt. You zealously take it into yourself and guard it away. You have the capacity, but not the will. I would give all of this up, to feel that for one day."

"You made your choice not to feel."

"Yes I did," the Queen said, standing up. "I made that choice freely when I was no more than a child. I saw no other way for me to exist. Zosia the gypsy beggar was dead, as far as society was concerned. For almost two thousand years I have wandered this orb taking on something I could never have of my own . . . until now."

"The pain I have numbs me. It deadens me. I wish you could . . . "

"I can take it all away."

"And I can make you feel."

Alex took a step forward, and reached out with both her hands, towards her.

"See, Alexandra, we're the perfect two pieces to your puzzle. Put us together, and pain becomes both bearable, and beautiful."

The Queen took a step forward, her eyes piercing into Alex's. Standing right in front of each other, they were inches away from touching. In a hypnotic, yet gentle voice, the Queen said, "Look at me. I can be Sam for you. Isn't that what you want? She went too suddenly. You've said so yourself. How many times have you wished for one more chance with her? I've heard your plea. I have felt your anguish and despair. She was the only one you ever allowed to control you. You miss that, don't you? You long for that release - to give it all up – your responsibilities, emotions, thoughts . . . to put it all in a safe place, and be allowed to feel only pleasure once again."

"I can't. There's too much pain."

"The pain you breathe . . . the pain you feel every time your heart beats and you know hers doesn't. I can take it all away. "

Alex shivered from deep inside as she felt the words stroke her soul with icy fingers.

"Just one more time . . . Just like she used to . . ."

Their kiss was like striking a match. Warm desire stirred slowly in her being, as cold lips caressed hers. It seemed like hours later, when their mouths parted. Alex was floating in a sphere of lust and desire.

"Remember how she used to watch you? I want to watch you now. I want you on the throne, where you belong, naked. I want to see you touching yourself. I want to see you replace pain, with pleasure."

Alex looked down at her shirt that had been unbuttoned while they were kissing. She discarded her trousers unceremoniously, and walked towards the throne, wearing only her white shirt. Her long hair trailed behind her, over her shoulders, and down her back. She sat down, facing the Queen.

"Open your legs. Spread them wide open, with your knees apart. Just like that . . . just like that. "

Alex obeyed.

"Close your eyes, Alexandra, and feel."

Again, Alex did as she was told.

"I want you to remember the time she put her hand over yours while you fucked yourself for her. You were standing in front of a mirror, watching yourselves."

Alex remembered Sam's lips next to her ear. It gave her little shivers. She remembered Sam's hand on her breast, and the sounds she had made.

"She told you to take your hand away, because she wanted to feel how wet you were."

Alex's hand moved sensually down her body. Going deliciously slowly, she trailed her fingers over her skin and eventually started rubbing between her thighs.

"And then her fingers joined yours, inside of you."

Alex mirrored her words, feeling a kaleidoscope of warmth and desire wrap around her, like a safe blanket.

"Remember when she pushed you against the wall, and moulded her body to yours? Remember how she kissed you? The heat . . . she could feel your wetness through your clothes. Remember how your body reacted as she stroked you slowly, through fabric? The urgency with which she removed your clothes . . . her fingers entering you forcefully as she bit her way down your body, while she fucked you furiously? Remember how you throbbed against her fingers? "

The Queen watched Alex's fingers play through wetness, with a wicked, half smile and enjoyed the sounds of pleasure coming from her mouth.

"And then she wanted to taste you. You both slid down the wall and kissed slow, long kisses. Her hands were all over you as you licked her fingers. Remember how good it felt? Remember how you wanted more? Remember the ecstasy when finally you felt her mouth on you? Her tongue lapping at you, tasting?"

Orgasm surged through Alex's body powerfully, leaving her panting, and gasping for air, as her body slowly started relaxing.

"You had amazing sexual energy. You fed off each other. "

Alex opened her mouth to speak, but the Queen motioned for her to be silent.

"That's one sure way of delaying pain for a few moments. Pleasure."

The Queen walked to the throne, and held her hand out towards Alex. Alex took it, their fingers entwined, as the Queen pulled her up gently, and placed a soft kiss on her hand.

"Altar." The Queen whispered. They walked hand in hand towards the altar. Alex watched as the Queen cleared a space in the middle. She came towards Alex, placing her hands on her shoulders, and walked her backwards towards the cleared space.

"Tell me what you want." The Queen whispered.

"Does it matter what I want? You're going to do to me what you want to anyway."

The situation was spiralling slowly out of control, which was exactly what they both wanted.

The Queen kissed her shoulders, and made her sit on the edge of the altar. Standing between her legs, she pushed Alex down onto her back.

"I want to worship you."

Alex was delirious with want. The Queen knelt between her legs, and kissed the skin of her parted thighs with icy lips.

"But first . . . I need you helpless."

The moment Alex felt the leather ties scrape around her ankles, as the Queen pulled them tightly together; she let out a groan, and arched her back fiercely. The Queen knotted the leather forcefully, recalling the ancient ritual of hair braiding and tying, while her fingers worked fast. She moved to the other side of the altar, pulled the woman's arms above her head, and tied her wrists together in the same manner.

The Queen sat down on the side, looking at the vulnerable goddess on her altar. Holding eye contact with her, she lit a few candles. She leaned over, and licked Alex's lips slowly and seductively. Her tongue was cold against her warm lips. Alex's breath caught in her throat as The Queen trailed slow kisses and licks down her body. The contrast between hot skin, and her icy mouth, was heavenly torture.

The Queen reached for a candle, and dripped hot wax over Alex's breasts and stomach with slow, deliberate movements. Alex let out a groan, and mumbled incoherently. She held the candle just above her sex, while she hovered inches away. Alex felt her icy breath flow over her sex. She shivered.

"Please . . . "

"You are not to find release, until I allow it." The Queen whispered.

Alex closed her eyes and let the sensations spill over her in waves.

The Queen turned her first onto her side, and then onto her front. She straddled her back, and removed the amulet from her own neck. She ran the flat edge of the amulet down Alex's arms and across her shoulders. Alex had a difficult time lying still as she moved the stone around the sides of her breast and down over her hips. She traced light patterns up her lower back, and over her arms.

"I choose to give you pleasure and I choose not to take away your pain."

Eventually, she put it around Alex's neck, the amulet resting just below the back of her neck. The Queen took a candle, and held it over the amulet. Almost immediately, Alex felt the burn of a thousand fires as the stone heated up and surged into her skin. She cried out, first to the Queen, and then to the Goddess, as pain overtook her completely.

"Feel pain to feel pleasure . . ." the Queen mumbled. Enjoy it while you can. Soon you won't be able to feel your own pain ever again."

She put the candle down, took a knife into her one hand and leaned over towards Alex's ear. Alex was whimpering softly.

"I can take it all away."

The Queen kissed down her neck, and over her shoulders, as she slowly began to peel the amulet off Alex's skin with the tip of the knife. Through the blistered skin, mixed with candle wax, she could see that the amulet had burnt a perfect pattern onto her skin.

"And now, you're my perfect Queen of Pain." She whispered.

~ ~ ~

The reporter pushed his way past the police barricade and approached the dark haired woman.

"Dr. Crane. Can you tell me what was inside the building? It's been said you had a find in there of major proportions."