Rob's Fortune

One night at a charity event Monica Kois was talking to Ellen and me and out of nowhere she said:

"When are you going to put a ring on her finger Rob?"

Ellen laughed and said, "He's afraid to ask me. He thinks that he is too old for me."

"Is he?" Monica asked.

"Not in the least."

"Better move on it Rob before she gets away."

As Monica moved away Ellen said, "We have spent a lot of time together at these events. Maybe for appearances sake we should get me a ring to wear when we attend one."

"Where did that "He thinks he's too old for me" come from?"

"I had to say something and that was the first thing that came to mind. Just in case you are wondering you aren't you know."

"I'm not?"

"Like I told Monica; not in the least."

The next day was a Saturday and I took Ellen to a jewelry store and told her to pick out a ring. She chose a small inexpensive engagement ring and I told her no.

If we are going to do this we need to act serious about it. Pick out something that is at least a half carat."

"Are you sure?"

"I can't have anyone thinking I'm cheap when it comes to my lady."

Ellen picked out a half carat solitaire in a platinum setting and it was the right size for her finger so we left the shop with her wearing it. We stopped for lunch and when we had finished eating and were having an after meal cup of coffee Ellen asked:

"Can I get a little personal here?"

"I suppose so."

"Why are we doing what we are doing? I don't understand our relationship at all. You seem to be the perfect catch for some lucky girl. Why do you need me? Why isn't this ring on the finger of a real fiancée? At first I was thinking that you were gay or one of those guys with erectile dysfunction and I was being used as camouflage, but I have seen your erections at times when you have looked at me and I've felt them when we have danced. Just what is going on here Rob?"

I looked at her for several seconds while I tried to think of a reasonable lie, but then decided to hell with it and I told her the truth.

"I find myself in a position where I need a woman to fill the role that you are filling. And I am the kind of guy who needs feminine companionship, but I don't trust women any more."

I told her everything from Marcy to Cheri and then said, "I just can't let it happen to me again so I decided that the best thing for me to do is what we are doing now."

"Then the next question is why haven't you taken it farther. I told you when you first brought up the idea that I occasionally provided extra services. Why haven't you taken advantage of that?"

I explained my thinking to her and she looked at me like I had two heads. "I know you have urges Rob, I've seen the tented pants and I can not believe a healthy male like you settles for nothing but manual stimulation."

"I don't" I said and then I told her about my weekly visits to Tasha.

"And you plan to live the rest of your life this way?"

I shrugged and called for the check. She was silent on the drive home and after we got there she took off in her car to do some shopping. When she got back she fixed dinner and we made dinner conversation and then she went off to her rooms to work on a term paper that was due in the coming week. I watched a couple of hours of television and then I called it a night.

I woke up thinking I was having a wet dream, but found that Ellen was in my bed with my cock in her mouth. A little bit groggily I mumbled:

"What are you doing here?"

She took her mouth off of me and said, "Saving you fifteen hundred dollars."

"But I don't wa..."

"Hush up. You have no say in the matter" and she went back to sucking me. When she was satisfied that she had me where she wanted me she moved up and lowered herself down on me and after that nature took over. I came and I think she did and then she got me hard again and the second time I'm sure that she had an orgasm and after I had mine we fell asleep snuggled up against each other.

I was alone in the bed when I woke up in the morning. I got up, showered and headed for the kitchen to make coffee. When I walked into the kitchen I found Ellen there fixing breakfast – naked! She stopped what she was doing, walked over to me and kissed me.

"I don't normally cook in the nude. This is just my way of letting you know that last night was not a spur of the moment not to be repeated incident. If you are stupid enough to say no I will respect your wishes otherwise get used to me being your bed buddy."

"Why? Why did you do it and why do you want to keep on doing it?"

"Several reasons. One is that I am a healthy female with a pretty good sex drive and between school and what I am doing with you I haven't had time to find a boyfriend and I'm horny as hell. Another is that I've wanted to get your pants off of you since our first date but one of my ironclad rules when I escorted was that I would never make the first move. I would always wait on the client to sound me out. You have no idea how hard it was for me to stick to that rule as far as you were concerned. I kept waiting for you to say something, but you never did. When you proposed this live I thing I thought for sure that we would end up in your bed the first night I was here, but it didn't happen and yesterday I found out why. So I decided that if you weren't going to make the move then it was going to be up to me. Last night I took the bull by the horns and here we are."

As she had been talking she untied my robe and took my cock in her hands and it stiffened as she stroked it.

"Don't panic baby, I'm not looking for anything out of it but sexual satisfaction."

She went to her knees in front of me and her mouth took over from her hands. After a minute or two she stood up, sat on the kitchen table and spread her legs.

"Start my day off right lover. Feed me your sausage and then I'll feed you pancakes and we will see where the day goes from there."

We never got dressed that Sunday as we followed each other around the house and made up for lost time. That night Ellen moved out of her bedroom into mine.

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Over the next six months Ellen and I lived pretty much as man and wife. At events people noticed the engagement ring and the "when is the wedding?" questions started. Ellen would say that it wouldn't be until after she graduated with her degree and the thought that she would actually be getting that degree filled me with dread. Once she had it in hand I would lose her.

The one thing I had never done was lie to myself so I had to face the facts. I loved her. I loved her and I didn't want to lose her, but at the same time I was afraid to commit myself. I still had my mistrust of women (although something inside me was screaming "Ellen is different, Ellen is different") and then there was the fact that Ellen had never treated our relationship as anything other than a business arrangement with a 'friends with benefits' facet. But my fear of losing her was stronger than the sum of all of my other fears and so I took the plunge.

It was at a benefit for The Salvation Army and Ellen and I were talking with Horace Briscoe when Gail Briscoe walked up to join us. "Have you set a date yet?" she asked. Before Ellen could give her stock reply I said:

"She graduates next May so we are planning a June wedding. I'm not sure yet whether it will be the first week or second so keep both open. I figure to mail out the invitations the first week in May."

Ellen looked at me stunned as Horace and Gail said they wouldn't miss it for the world and then turned and walked over to talk to Stan Witman.

Ellen looked at me with an expression that I couldn't read and then she said:

"I seemed to have missed something here. I seem to have forgotten the conversation where we set a wedding date. Something else I missed too. Was I asleep when you asked me to marry you?"

"You must have been. You have the engagement ring on and I couldn't have put it on you unless you said yes."

"Are you serious about this?"

"Yes I am."

"Why the one-eighty? I remember you telling me that you didn't trust women and you would never put yourself in a position to be hurt again."

"That was before you. It dawned on me that if I didn't make a move you were going to graduate, take your new degree and move on with your life. I don't believe I could stand going home to the house if you were not there. I couldn't come up with the guts to ask you straight out so I ambushed you tonight."

"You don't think that maybe you should have talked with me before telling Horace and Gail what you told them? What if I would have said "Oh no we aren't."

"Why would you do that? You are the one who has been telling everybody that we would set a date as soon you had your degree. Well graduation is in sight."

"You are side stepping the issue Rob. What if I don't want to marry you?"

"Then I guess you won't."

"What made you think I would marry you?"

"You seemed happy living with me and sharing a bed with me so why wouldn't I think you might marry me?"

"What we have been doing is not the same as being married."

"Sure it is. We do everything together. We do things for each other. We damned sure fit the bill as far as sexual intimacy is concerned. We snuggle, we cuddle and we do everything that married couples do. Christ Ellen, we even go grocery shopping together so don't tell me that what we have been doing isn't the same as being married. I like what we have been doing and I want to keep on doing it. That means I have to marry you before you can get away."

"This isn't the place to be having this conversation Rob. We will talk about it when we get home."

The ride home was silent as Ellen stared out the passenger side window. When we got to the house she went into the living room and sat down on the couch. As soon as I sat down Ellen said:

"I don't want to get married Rob." She paused and then said, "No, that's not right. I don't want to get married now. I've been looking forward to getting my degree so that I could have a life. So I could have a real job and live a normal life and not a life centered around men. To wake up in the morning and not have to wonder if I am going to have to go to some cocktail party or other with some slug of a man who might have passed the agency's screening, but who had bad breath or body odor. To be able to go home from work knowing that I could just flake out and not have to dress up and make myself pretty for a man that I had never seen before and would probably never see again.

"What I have been looking forward to Rob is a man free existence. I am not anti men Rob; I just need a break from them. For the last four years my life has revolved around men. Two, three or five different men every week. Dates I could not say no to because I needed the money. I need "me" time Rob. I want some time to myself; some time where I don't have to devote time to anyone but me."

I sat there and listened to her and I understood what she was saying, but understanding it did not ease the pain I was starting to feel. Another woman I wanted who did not want me. It didn't help any that I had done it to myself. I had sworn that I would never let another woman get her claws deep enough into me that it would hurt. That is why I went the escort route in the first place. It was my own damned fault.

Ellen could read my face and she quickly said:

"It isn't your fault Rob. I'm just not ready. I'm tickled to death that you want me enough to want to marry me. I'm just not ready."

There wasn't anything I could say to that so I just shrugged, stood up and left the room. I undressed and because of all the cigarette smoke that had been in the room at the event I decided to take a shower before turning in. I was washing my hair when the curtain slid open and Ellen got into the shower with me,

"Nothing has changed Bobby" she said as she took the soap and wash cloth and started to wash my cock. The result was predictable and I took her from behind as she leaned against the wall.

After, lying in the bed staring up at the ceiling, I thought about her comment. Of course things had changed. She would be leaving. In a way it would be even worse than it had been with Marcy, Annie and Cheri. With those three it had happened quickly – boom boom and it was over except for the pain – but with Ellen I had seven months to wait for the end. Seven months for it to eat at me and then God only knew how long to get over it after she was gone. I wasn't strong enough. I couldn't do it. I could not suffer through the next seven months.

The next morning when we sat down to breakfast I asked her if she had any idea where she would like to live when she struck out on her own.

"I hadn't given it much thought. I've still got a while before it happens. Why?"

"I thought we could use this weekend to look at apartments."

She looked at me for several seconds and then said, "It doesn't need to be this way Bobby."

"Yes it does Ellen. It will be all over when you graduate and I can't, just can not, suffer through seven months knowing what is coming. Better to make the break now so I can start trying to get by it. My deal with you remains unchanged, but instead of you living here you will be in your own apartment. I'll take care of the first years rent and utilities and nothing else will change."

She put her fork down and said, "Fine! If that's the way you want it."

She stood up, scraped her plate off into the garbage disposal, put it in the dishwasher and walked out of the room without another word.

x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x

Ellen stayed in her room that evening and Saturday at breakfast she handed me a list of apartments she wanted to look at. She said that the fourth one we looked at would work for her so she did the paperwork. She signed a one year lease and I wrote a check for the first year and security deposit. I don't believe we said more than seventy-five words to each other from the time she sat down at the breakfast table until she signed the lease agreement and the ride home was silent. Once we were back home I handed her a credit card and said:

"You are going to need furniture, pots and pans, curtains and whatever. Get what you think you will need."

"What kind of limit do I have?"

"Get whatever you want or think you will need. Unless you buy gold plated furniture you can't max out that card."

She looked at me with an unreadable expression on her face and then turned and left the room. I heard her leave the house about a half hour later. She wasn't back by the time I went to bed and in the morning I woke up alone. I knew she was home because I heard the shower running in the bathroom at the end of the hall. I was in the kitchen making coffee when I heard the garage door open and then close so I knew she had gone out again.

I called a couple of guys I knew and then drove over to the country club and played eighteen holes and then had a long lunch with them. When I got home I found my credit card on the kitchen table and on top of it was the engagement ring I'd bought for Ellen. She didn't come home that night and she wasn't there when I got home from work the next day. When she didn't come home Monday night I checked her room and found that everything of hers was gone. I called her cell and when she answered I said:

"Hi. Where have you been?"

"You wanted me out so I got out. What nights will you need me this week?"

Every one of them is what I wanted to say, but I didn't. "I don't have anything going for this week."

"I'm not going to have a phone put in so when you need me call my cell."

I said okay, bye and hung up the phone. I'd gotten what I wanted. She was out of the house and I wouldn't have to suffer being around her for the next seven month. And it was killing me.

x-x-x-x-x-x-x

The rest of the week went by and I was starting to get used to waking up and Ellen not being there. Not used to her not being there, but used to mornings alone.

Monday I showed up early for my class and I was having pie and coffee in the cafeteria and I saw Ellen and some guy walk in together, go through the line and when Ellen got to the cashier I saw her notice me, but after she paid she went to a table on the other side of the room and sat down with the guy she walked in with. I finished my coffee and headed off to class.

Tuesday afternoon I got a call from Stu Miller asking me to a cocktail party on Friday evening and I told him I would be there. I reached for the phone to call Ellen, but at the last second I decided not to. I called Premier and found that Mellisa was available and I arranged to meet her.

Several people at the party seemed surprised to see me with Mellisa and not Ellen. Horace and Gail were there and I could see that it was all Gail could do to keep from coming over and asking me where Ellen was. Probably a good thing since I had no idea of what I could say to her.

x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x

I tried to find things to do to keep me busy over the weekend, but whatever I did and wherever I went in the house I saw something that reminded me of Ellen. Well, I had gone through it with the others and I had somehow managed to survive and I would eventually put this behind me too.

Monday when I went to class I made sure to avoid the cafeteria and avoid any chance of seeing Ellen. At work I had some important projects that I was able to bury myself in and that helped me keep my mind off of Ellen. Wednesday I needed an escort so I called Premier again. My date that evening was a very attractive brunette. Traci was everything you could ask for in a date and she hung on my arm and acted like a woman determined to fight off any other female who might have designs on her man. Horace wasn't at the affair, but Gail was and I could see that curiosity was eating her alive.

By Thursday I felt the need and I called Tasha to see if she was available. She was and I took her to dinner and a show and during the evening she asked me where I had been spending my time since she hadn't seen me in a while. I'd always been able to talk to Tasha – that was one of the reasons I had tried to set her up as my mistress – and so I told her about Ellen and how she came about and how things had ended up. Tasha was sympathetic and then she told me that she would take my mind off Ellen at least for a little while.

But she didn't.

The sex was satisfying, but it did not take my mind off of Ellen. It didn't matter what Tasha did – and none of it was bad – I would think "That's not the way Ellen did it" or "Ellen would have...."

When I was dressing to leave Tasha said, "I like seeing you Rob and I am in no hurry to chase you away, but if your feelings for this girl are s strong as you say you need to do something about it. You need to find some way to stay in touch and be a friend. You need to show her that you care, but are still willing to respect her wishes. I can see her side of it Rob. I can see where she feels the need to take a break from men. I've thought of it a time or two myself. It sounds as if she cares for you, but isn't ready to settle down. Give her some space Rob. Stay in touch, be a friend, but give her some space. I'm not sure that I have this right; it is just something that I heard somewhere, but I goes something like "If you love something set it free. If it comes back to you it has always been yours. If it doesn't, it was never yours to begin with."

x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x

Friday night there was a meeting of the Arts Council and I wondered how it would go because Gail was also on the council. Sure enough when the meeting broke up Gail grabbed onto me and asked me to have coffee with her. I couldn't be impolite so I said okay. I knew it was coming so when she asked where Ellen had been lately I had a story ready. I shrugged and said: