All Comments on 'Role Play Ch. 04'

...Surrey is nowhere near "central England", but south of London. I might add that the story seems to me to be a mess; the name confusion you have the grace to apologise for doesn't help, especially after such a long gap when it becomes necessary to go back and re-read earlier episodes. Two things appear to be necessary for you to be an accomplished writer of short stories: first, do your research [Surrey is shown on any map of Great Britain], and second, edit, edit, edit; if you're not too good at that yourself, get someone to do it for you. Finally, DO KEEP WRITING. I know my comments seem negative, but they are intended with good will to be constructive and helpful rather than nasty and spiteful. Good luck. Freddy