Roving Dreams

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Will Adrian forever be lost in the recesses of his mind?
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Author's Note: This short story was first written for the 2010 Gay Authors Summer Anthology, first published in July 2010.

The trees blurred by as Adrian Jackson sped down the mountain highway on his way home from visiting his sister and her family. A weekend away from Randall was just too long. Randy had planned on joining him, but his own family's unexpected arrival had derailed their plans. Adrian's thoughts drifted to the man who'd been his partner for the last five years. Randy's blonde hair and bright blue eyes contrasted with his own mousy brown hair and chocolate eyes. Even Adrian had to admit that they were stunning together. Randy was only slightly taller than Adrian's own five foot ten frame but they both had the same toned physique, and worked at staying slim by running every morning. Adrian's thoughts were so focused on Randy that he failed to see the deer grazing along the side of the road until a young fawn stepped directly in the path of his car.

Adrian swore as he jerked the wheel and slammed the brake pedal to the floor with his foot. He heard the distinct screech of his tires as the car skidded before dropping over the edge of an embankment. Adrian felt as though he was suspended in mid air before his car slammed into the trunk of a large pine. Sounds seemed to be muted, but he vaguely heard the snapping of branches as his car plummeted to the ground. His vision began to blur and his last thought was of Randy before his world became black.

***

Adrian took in the scene in front of him. The last thing he remembered was swerving to miss the fawn, and he couldn't figure out how he came to be at a lake surrounded by mountains. A slight breeze tousled his hair and created ripples across the surface of the water. Climbing to his feet, Adrian picked up a smooth rock and with a fling of his arm, set the pebble skipping across the surface of the water.

"It's beautiful here, isn't it," said a familiar voice from behind him. Adrian whirled around and found himself face to face with Randy.

"How did I get here?" Adrian asked quietly, bothered by the fact that he couldn't remember anything after the accident.

"How you got here really isn't important," Randy answered as he reached out to clasp Adrian's hand before sitting down and pulling Adrian down next to him. "What's important is how you're going to get back," Randy said mysteriously.

"Get back where?" Adrian asked. His mind was full of confusion as he tried to figure out exactly what was going on.

"Get back home, to me, where you belong," Randy answered as he stroked the back of Adrian's hand with his thumb and looked out over the water.

"I'm with you now," Adrian argued. "What do you mean get back home to you?"

"Do you remember when we first met?" Randy asked, changing the subject as a slight smile curved his lips.

Before Adrian could answer, a movie seemed to materialize in front of him. He instantly recognized the restaurant where he had first met Randy. They had actually been set up by a mutual friend on a blind date. Adrian had been apprehensive about being set up with someone he had never met, but their friend had finally convinced him to meet Randy at the restaurant.

"I almost didn't show up," Adrian remembered. "I was never a big fan of blind dates." Adrian risked a glance at Randy only to find his attention completely focused on the scene playing out in front of them.

Adrian turned his attention back to their first meeting and just watched as he was shown to the table where Randy sat. As he watched, he remembered how Randy had quickly stood up before holding out his hand. He smiled slightly as he watched himself take Randy's hand and could still remember the warmth that had spread over his palm upon contact with Randy's skin.

The sat in silence as they watched themselves go through the process of getting to know each other. They had both asked a lot of questions that night and had found out that they had a lot in common. They enjoyed the same type of music and movies. They were both into working out, and how both of their families had been supportive when they had come out to them. He couldn't tear his eyes away from the scene playing out in front of him. Their dinner was done and they just sat and talked before finally getting up and leaving the restaurant. Randy had walked him to his car and despite having been a first date and never having known each other before, Randy had taken the initiative and had leaned over and pressed his lips lightly against Adrian's. Adrian could remember being afraid at first of someone coming upon them and saying something, but Randy's lips had quickly chased the thoughts from his head.

As soon as the kiss ended, the picture in the air disintegrated before his eyes until Adrian found himself gazing once again at the lake. The breeze had died down and the lake's surface was smooth and glassy. Neither man said anything as they sat and took in the peaceful scenery around them. Even as they watched, a doe and a fawn appeared from the trees, and Adrian wondered for a moment if it was the same fawn that he had swerved to avoid hitting. The deer didn't seem to be aware of them as they meandered their way down to the water, stopping a mere ten feet from them at the water's edge and lowering their heads to drink.

Turning to glance at Randy, Adrian noticed tears building in his eyes. He reached up and wiped the lone tear that escaped away before leaning towards his partner to press a gentle kiss to his lips. He was surprised when Randy pulled away before their lips could touch and looked at him questioningly.

"You need to wake up first Adrian, you need to come back to me, only then can we be together again," Randy whispered to him before climbing to his feet and turning away from Adrian.

Adrian scurried to his feet as Randy started to walk away. He took a step towards Randy only to watch as he simply faded away. His mind a mass of confusion, Adrian turned back to the lake to find the deer had disappeared as well. Not sure what was going on, Adrian started walking around the shoreline of the lake.

***

Adrian heard the sounds of waves crashing against the shoreline and found himself staring out into the vast ocean. His hands in his pockets he wondered how he had gotten there, the last he remembered was walking around a lake in the mountains. He watched as the waves rolled in from the distance only to break and crash against the sandy beach. Turning his head, he saw Randy walking towards him, the rest of the beach deserted. Without a word, Randy walked up to him and took his hand to lead him further down the beach before stopping and sitting in the sand. Randy didn't talk to him until they were sitting side by side, gazing out at the sea of water.

"Do you remember when we pledged our love for each other and promised to be together forever?" Randy asked him quietly as he studied the ocean.

"As if I could ever forget," Adrian whispered back with a smile. Just like in the mountains, a movie of that day materialized in the sky over the water and Adrian got to watch as the scene played itself out. He watched as the two of them were lying together on Randy's couch. The TV was on, and Randy's arms were around him. His back was nestled against Randy's chest and he seemed to be engrossed in the movie they were watching. He had never known before, but Randy wasn't watching the movie, instead, he was gazing down at Adrian, and even now, the love in his eyes was plain to see.

Adrian watched in fascination as Randy dipped his head and pressed a light kiss to his neck, causing Adrian to turn in his arms so they were face to face.

'I love you' Randy had whispered before claiming Adrian's lips with his own. Adrian could remember the feel of his heart pounding in his chest at the mere thought that the man in his arms was his. He watched as he returned Randy's kiss, their lips seeking a connection that couldn't be broken.

'I love you too' Adrian had whispered when they had finally pulled apart. Adrian watched as he gazed up at Randy, both of them smiling, hands caressing each other as they both lost themselves in the wonder of being together.

'Stay with me forever' Randy had whispered in the silent room as though he was afraid of breaking whatever kind of trance they were in.

'Yes' had been the only word Adrian could get out before Randy's lips had claimed his again.

The scene from the past disappeared and Adrian found himself once again staring at the ocean. The only sound was of the water lapping against the sand of the beach and the seagulls overhead. He watched as a pod of dolphins started jumping about a hundred yard from shore, and slightly past them, a couple of humpback whales broke the surface, shooting water out of their blowholes.

"What's going on?" Adrian asked Randy, breaking the silence. "What are we doing here?"

"I don't know all the answers," Randy answered. "It's time for you to wake up Adrian. You need to wake up in order to come back to me, to everything we have together."

"How do I wake up?" Adrian asked.

"You have to want it," Randy answered before leaning over and pressing a fleeting, barely there, kiss on Adrian's lips. "Come back to me," Randy whispered before climbing to his feet, Adrian's hand still clasped in his.

Adrian did his best to hold onto Randy as Randy started walking away, but no matter how hard he held on, Randy's hand slowly slipped out of his. Adrian watched in despair as Randy started walking away down the beach before fading away. Not knowing what else to do, Adrian followed the path his lover and partner had taken.

***

Adrian found himself staring out at a vast barren landscape covered in nothing but sand. He glanced around him and once again found he was alone. There were no trees dotting the horizon, as far as he could see there was nothing but sand. As he watched, Randy materialized in front of him and started walking towards him. Adrian was expecting Randy to take his hand again and was surprised when Randy stopped just out of arms reach.

"It's pretty barren out here, isn't it?" Randy questioned as he glanced around him. "There's nothing here, no water, no food, just sand and sun. Nobody around for hundreds of miles."

"How did we get here?" Adrian questioned as he took a step towards Randy and reached for him, shocked when Randy took a step back and stayed out of reach.

"How we got here isn't important," Randy repeated the words from the lake in the mountain. "What is important is what this represents."

"What does this represent?" Adrian asked as he took another look around him. When he turned his full attention back to Randy he hated the look of despair in Randy's eyes.

"This is my existence if you don't wake up," Randy answered sadly. "The beauty in the world can only truly exist if there's someone to share it with. Without you by my side, my heart will be as empty as this desert. I need you by my side Adrian, just like we always planned."

"I'll always be by your side," Adrian answered as he reached for Randy. His hands sliced through Randy as though his lover was nothing more than a ghost. Randy was quickly fading away in front of his eyes.

"Please Adrian, wake up and return to me," Randy whispered before disappearing.

"I don't know how!" Adrian yelled out in despair as the wind started blowing in great gusts. The sand began to whirl around him like a tornado. The winds picked up and the sand made it impossible to see as he struggled to free himself from the sand holding him in its center. "Tell me how!" Adrian yelled.

"You just have to want it," Randy's voice came to him on the wind. "Just want it enough and love me enough to open your eyes."

Adrian felt the bite of the sand as it swirled in torrents around him. Despite his confusion on what was happening, he knew that he needed to escape from the sand and wind before he became lost forever. Focusing his thoughts on what Randy had told him, Adrian closed his eyes and used all of his energy to picture himself hand in hand with his partner. The wind seemed to dissipate and the sting of sand against his skin disappeared as the picture in his mind began to take shape and become stronger. Adrian sensed an extra strength filling his mind and realized that wherever Randy was, he was lending him his own strength. Adrian fused the extra strength with his own as he willed himself to do as Randy had told him and wake up.

***

Adrian slowly became aware of a hand clasping his own and forced himself to open his eyes. His eye lids fluttered slowly before finally allowing him to open his eyes completely. He found himself staring up at a puzzle of white ceiling tiles and slowly turned his head until he found himself gazing into the relieved eyes of his lover. He tried to say Randy's name but couldn't seem to find his voice. Instead he was forced to simply look at Randy. His heart broke as the red-rimmed eyes looked back at him, tears flowing down Randy's face as Randy lifted his hand to his lips and kissed it. Adrian could do nothing but watched as Randy forced himself to his feet to lean over him.

He felt the hot tears as they fell from Randy's eyes to land upon his face as Randy delicately pressed his lips to his before whispering, "Welcome back to me my love."


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Renee_StevensRenee_Stevensalmost 12 years agoAuthor
Thank You!

Thank you for the comments on this story! This one was one that I was very unsure about when I first wrote it, but in the end, I think it turned out pretty good! I have many more stories that can be found on my website, the link can be found in my profile! Thank you again!

wingedchaoswingedchaosalmost 12 years ago
So sweet and touching!

Such a romantic thought and expressed with a dram of experience! so good... thank you!

cliffgirl08cliffgirl08about 12 years ago
Wow!

Achingly beautiful and sweet.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 12 years ago
Lovely!

A sweet, sweet story! More like that please!

le8mebeele8mebeeabout 12 years ago
whoa...

real deep...

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