All Comments on 'Sierra's Identity Change'

... Looking forward to seeing how she protects that identity moving forward!

We now know about her past. Now time to see the future. Great start.

There are a lot of pornstars whose the marriage out of the porn industry were failure they becam divorced some lost the children custody in the divorce and there are who hid themselves from the World. The last group is the interesting what sort of mother is an hidden expornstar?

A blackmailing story.............the clishe is the fan of Sierra oblidges Pamela to cheat on her husband.

1. Her marriage goes to divorce

2. She becomes cheater and the husband is clueless.

3. She saves her marriage from the predator (with hel or without help of her husband) and her past and she will be mother for two.

The first 1. and 2. were written in more stories, but 3. direction the most interesting and I think YOU COULD WRITE THAT DIRCTION!

But just Ok. A little on the short side for a chapter.

aren't real people. Everybody knows Pornstars don't have real feelings or emotions. Also it helps that porn stars have no respect for themselves or anybody else. Yes, pornstars are just mass produced images on DVD covers, magazine spreads, or sextoy merchandising...and nothing more.

For her to think she could be anything else, is like the replicants from 'Blade Runner' thinking that they were actually alive.

OK,OK,OK.......enough sarcasm.

Like Duna hinted at. If you are going to make this a series, what will the point? What is the message? Did you really need her to be a pornstar for your plot to work? Is your story going to be about a cheating slut? Blackmail? Revenge? Whatever you choose, the fact that you make her an ex pornstar has ALREADY hurt this stories credibility. You are going to have to work very hard to make any of these characters sympathetic. My guess is that the preacher hubby KNOWS of her past and won't be surprised, but he will still get hurt by her cheating. Starting a series where the chapters are so short ISN'T a good sign. If you want these people to be anything other than cardboard cutout stereo-types, then you will need longer chapters filled with character development. Like Duna said, you can recycle old plotlines if you want to, even make use of cliche's, but you NEED to make the characters stand out. You need to work on dialogue. That is the only way to make someone else's idea your own.

Sorry, but your intro doesn't hint at great things to come.

But it is never too late to try harder.

Good Luck!

GOOD START= WE DON'T NEED ALL THE GLORY DETAILS OF HER PAST LIFE. BEFORE YOU GET TO ANY DRAMA WITH HER PRESENT LIFE MAYBE A LITTLE MORE BACKGROUND OF WHAT THAT LIFE IS FOR HER. PLEASE DON'T BE TEMPTED TO MAKE THIS AN BTB STORY. IT WOULD BE NICE TO HAVE AN STORY THAT SHOWS THAT PEOPLE CAN MAKE MISTAKES IN THE PAST AND LEAVE THEM IN THE PAST

We see all the signs of the cliche. Ex-pornstar, alternate identity, unknowing friends, fan that lusts after her and will obviously figure out who she is. From the wording it looks like her husband didn't know her eye color but it could be that he doesn't know her past. I guess we find out in the future. Blackmail and cheating is the obvious direction just about every story goes. The best ones, however, take you down a different path. Something unexpected. She is, after all, married to a pastor in a small town. Maybe forgiveness of her past so that she isn't always afraid of what people might find out? I doubt it but you never know. We all know the Loving Wives category is generally about just about anything other than a truly loving and honest wife and that the couples that work it out are a rarity at best. It could be interesting to see where it goes, or it could be just another cliche...

It's not just that would a cliché, it's that it would be an inane cliché. If she really was the porn star this seems to indicate, if one person can find out about this, others can find out about this. It makes no sense to pay off (whether with sex or money) someone to keep silent about something that’s not all that secretive. What, she’s going pay off person after person after person?

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If that’s where this is going, I have to agree with the “don’t bother” crowd. Stories like this are innately stupid.

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P.S. Would it have killed you to use a chapter number in the title to warn this wasn't a complete story? Do you care that little about your own story?

3* for now...even if this is an introduction to the story...I know that the past always follows us...So what will happen? She has enough experience of life to know how to escape from blackmail...The problem is: Does she love her husband? Or are only confortable with him? Let's wait for the twist the writer will give to his story...

Set up for a good story.

Put in the effort to make this a good story: this is but a drop in the bucket.

You definitely have the start of something interesting. Looking forward to the next part.

Romantic1 has a story "Discovery01-04" where an ex pornstar becomes emploee at a pharmaceutical company (In North Caroline) and she married a good guy. They have 2 daughters, who go to college. Time after time the ex pornstar wife begins to send from her secret bank safe the porn cassets from 23 years to her husband to turbo their sex life after the daughters left the family house. The husband discovers her wife of 23 years was a pornstar not a top sexstar but a sexactor.

It is a funny thing a minister with secret ex porn star wife and to show an low IQ ex pornstar, who could not refuse a preacher, because she jeopardizes his future, but she have 500000$ so her future is not in danger........

Only true reason to hid herself from the World for an exponstar (with 500000$ bank deposite) is to produce BABIES! In this story the expornstar has not any babies or she is not pregnant. (or is not she fertile from Chlamydia against the non stop medical STD tests in the pornidustry?)

BTW Jenna Jameson becomes deep chatolic after her retirement, but her all marriages went wrong and she lost the children custody to her twin sons too.

Ciccolina divorced but she got the children custody.

I am curiouse this story does not became a tiresome cuckold story with church background.

The last paragraph revealed too much about the continuation. Blackmail yada yada been done to death. Surprise us.

a 3 score, but as we all know, the end is the hardest part. Love to see how you contnue this.

Here is the way these things go:

She get blackmailed into doing porn or hooking for this guy and his friends. Without that there is no conflict.

She does it and husband finds out and they go through hell to break her out of this OR

Husband doesn't find out immediately and we go through chapter after chapter of her trying to hide everything in whatever way the author devises.

There is not much else on can do. If you REALLY want to do something different, have the PASTOR HUSBAND be an ex-pornstar as well! Now that would be something really different with a lot of new territory to cover! :)

Regards

C

Some comments think you are telegraphing too much. Looking forward to whether that is the case or you are going to head fake us. Keep writing.

Great start I think, very interesting beginning and so many possibilities. Looking forward to the next chapter! Well Done!

This author has two other stories listed, which HAVEN'T BEEN FINISHED. So I wouldn't suggest you get to interested in this story.

You may think you know what's going to happen next, but surprises await. Not your typical Literotic, wham, bam thank you mam' ending :)

Very good story. She probably will find out she made the right decision. hopefully, her husband and later, her children don't find out...

Looks like she's missing her old porn life. I'll see what happens.