All Comments on 'Subway Girl Ch. 06'

I'm enjoying your story and looking forward to reading more chapters. You write very well. Thank you.

Why do you submit additional chapters only once a week? I have to go back and re-read the end of the previous chapter to remember what happened. Only once a week is too long a wait.

Looking forward to the next submission, though - even if I have to wait a week.

Thanks for writing this. I'm enjoying it.

I found this story unexpectedly and read all 5 chapters at once. I love how the story develop and today I came to find again cos remb some comment said you submitted on every Saturday. I love your story. Thank u!

Keep up the good work. This is a very good and sweet story.

And your protagonist 's journey doesn't happen overnight. You can detect the change in attitude, but he still doesn't take a hot shower for granted. Love your story, keep up the good work.

Can you be more specific in descibing the content of each chapter?

Your posted descriptions does not help me taking any interest in the story at all!

It also let me feel that you do not have ideas in the preliminary outline of the story.

I want to thank everyone who has read this far and especially those that take the time to vote or comment. The encouragement has been very heart warming, almost a virtual hug.

"Anonymous," sorry the pace of my posting frustrates you, that is not my intention. Please feel free to read my updated bio for an explanation.

DB

You continue to bring the characters into the light and still cast shadows over them. Alicia being sick, before her hands were scratched, she is obsessive over her grades, while Ray is opening up, becoming a human being after a year of near homelessness, living with drug addicts, finding meals in a trash can, now sprucing up the apartment, showing a sense of humor, eating at a restaurant. It is wonderful how this story is developing. While it seems straight forward, boy meets girl etc., etc. I sense some storms on the horizon. You write with a preset plan in mind, you know where you are going but we do not. I love it. I look forward to Saturday mornings and my time with Ray and Alicia. This is a story I do not want to miss and am eager to see each new chapter. - Kevin

Thank you for sharing your stories with us. I love reading Subway Girl about Ray and Alicia. You are really talented. Keep up the good work lady! Thank you again for taking the time to post your stories on this site. Alaska84

Hi DonnaBeck,

I have thoroughly enjoyed the plot buildup of this story and the subtle nuances to Ray rediscovering himself and his zest for life, to the hints of a darker side to Alicia that may suggest depressive symptoms or a history of self-harm and severe pressure to be "perfect." The novelist in me is drawn to the old fashioned boy meets girl love story with unique twists, whereas the therapist in me is curious to put the puzzle pieces together to better understand Alicia's neuroses (all respect intended.....I truly love her character). Please continue to grace us with your talented mind and pen.

~ Miss Marilou Weathersby

Please keep writing this story.

You have great characterizations and paint a great mental image of people and places.

Thank you for sharing this story.

I am really getting into this! Love the hints about Alicia - keeping us interested without giving too much away.

Another hint: when you're done typing up your story, hit Control+F and type in 'here' - check every instance and decide whether it should be 'here' or 'her' - it's easy enough to make the mistake while typing, but also easy to check and fix, to avoid readers tripping over those sentences.

Check out the value of th Cannabis crop.

With just enough underlying tension and special moments to keep us hooked.

I have to confess that I came to your trilogy via Runner Girl, which I read first before I knew there was a sequence to the stories. So I already had an introduction to the characters; thus, this is like a flashback. There's a certain advantage to that, even though some of the suspense of how this story will [likely] end is taken away.

I really enjoy your writing style and how you mold your story lines.

Quick how do eat a New York pizza? On a plate with a fork, at least your Gov. knows how....Whats his name?

You hit a nerve, glad the Mets knocked off the Bums from Brokeland!

juxtaposing an accountant studying to become a CPA with a day labourer is beyond creative. You show us NYC from multiple viewpoints simultaneously. While we still know almost nothing about the title character we are involved in a personal development course with Raymond. William has him in a college prep reading course, his apartment is undergoing a transformation as well. Yet he still stays humble as is indicated by his appreciation of a hot shower, the comments regarding the benches in the winter, and his sensitivity to her study schedule and his work mates humanity.

I'm guessing, since she is in a study group Wednesday evenings, that will leave an opening for him to join the library readers group?

this is fun to read.

thanks

And I'm really enjoying the ride...

Hope your well and maybe add some more good stories.

Red

still going!

It is really nice that we get to know them at the pace they get to know each other.

What a charming rapport blooms like summer blossoms. Nice to get regular employment, eh?