Talkin' In Your Sleep

"I'm sorry Dave," she said. "I missed having breakfast with you. But I was too embarrassed after what I said to face you." It was funny. She was already red with embarrassment from what she had just admitted. It only served to make her more beautiful.

I was so used to Tammy's unabashed, in your face manner that it was really refreshing. Tammy would never hold anything back. If we were having lunch with another couple, even if it was her own parents, she would just let her feelings fly. I remember, her shocking her gardening buddies a few times when she would just suddenly declare, "Excuse me ladies, my husband wants some pussy." They would be embarrassed or just burst out laughing, while Tammy just grabbed my hand and dragged me into the house.

Samantha was far too shy and reserved for something like that.

We ate our breakfast and as if to change the subject, she started talking about my least favorite topic. "Bob misses you," she said quietly. "We've been pretty much fighting nonstop since you..."

"Since I what?" I asked.

"You know, since you turned me down," she said shyly. "But I don't blame you. I'm not very sexy." I burst out laughing, spitting little bits of bacon all over the place. One of the bits of bacon landed on Samantha's face near her mouth. Several more landed on her blouse.

"What's so funny?" she asked. Then her tongue snaked out and licked the bacon near her mouth inside of it. She reached a finger out, and picked up one of the bacons bits and ate it too. If I could have done anything at that moment, it would have been to lean over and suck the rest of those bacon bits off of her breasts.

"God, I wish I was Bob," I said. That brought both a smile and that shy reddening of her face again. But at least this time she didn't just bolt.

Monday evening found me ensconced in my garage. I used my tuner to dial up a more aggressive profile. It would kill my gas mileage, but it would make the car faster, and give me better acceleration. The real thing I wanted was that it would also make the car louder. I was sure that when Tammy and Bob heard the car pull up, he'd run into the shed to hide. There was only one door to the shed and I'd beat his ass there.

Tammy looked into the garage a couple of times and tried to ask me what I was doing to the car, but I didn't answer her.

On Tuesday morning, I kissed Tammy goodbye before I went to work. Her eyes snapped open and she thrust her tongue down my throat. "Stay home with me," she said.

"I can't Sweetheart," I said. "We're so far behind schedule that I can't afford to miss any time."

"Sometimes, I wish you owned your own business like..." she began. Then she covered her mouth, realizing what she'd just done.

I just turned and left. At my breakfast date with Samantha, she was smiling like I had never seen. Her mood was lighter and more upbeat. Every time our eyes met she smiled. I felt as if she was dying to tell me something.

"Dave, can I ask you a favor?" she said.

"Of course," I said.

"Okay," she said excitedly. "Bob is going to try to talk to you this upcoming weekend. I think he's going to try to bring up the swapping thing again. He's been screaming at me and telling me not to blow it again. So the favor is ... could you just say yes?"

I was shocked. "I'm sorry Dave," she said. "I just thought..." She suddenly got up and I grabbed her hand to keep her from leaving.

"Sammie, you're not reading this right," I said. "I would love to be with you."

She was still squirming and trying to run away. "Then ... Why?" she asked. "You don't think that I'm a worthy trade for your sexy wife, right?"

"No, Sammie," I said. "I just think you're worth too much to trade you like a piece of furniture. I think that a woman like you should be loved and worshipped. I also think that when you marry someone, you keep your marriage vows. If I was married to you..." Her face was so red that I thought she would explode. She snatched her hand away from me and ran out of the restaurant.

When I got home Tuesday night, Tammy was just coming out of the house to go and work in the garden. She ran over to me in shock as she saw me getting out of a taxi cab.

"Are you okay, Davie?" she asked. "Where's the Mustang?"

"It's at the dealer," I said. "I'm having them check it out."

"Why didn't you call me? I could have come and picked you up," she said.

"I thought you'd be too busy trying to get me back together with Bob," I spat. I went into the house then, leaving her standing there. I had to be very careful. My timing had to be just right. I took my time changing clothes, and then lit the grill. Tammy saw me cooking and came over to see what I was doing. She could see the deck from the garden. She was using the spiked pick that I had made for her. I had forgotten about it. When she saw the two steaks and the salads I'd made she smiled and hugged me.

"I love you so much Davie," she gushed. "Can we talk this all out?" I nodded and as the sun went down we sat at the small table to eat.

"I don't love Bob," she said. "I've always thought of him as an asshole. I put up with him because he was your best friend. It just seems like ever since the two of you stopped talking, you've been angry all the time. You're not happy Dave, so I'm not happy. And then with all of the pressure you're under for work ... I just wanted you happy again."

"I loved you more than anything Tammy," I said. "So when Bob started talking about ... swapping ... it just pissed me off. You belong to me. No one else."

She laughed then. "Of course I do, silly. Bob wasn't talking about forever. He just meant for an hour or two. Lots of our friends have done it. It's just a way to spice things up and keep them fresh. I thought you'd have loved the chance to sleep with old stuck up Samantha."

"Why don't you like her?" I asked.

"We've lived here for four years," she said. "She never comes over unless she's with Bob and even then she doesn't say much. Whenever she did, it was usually about you, and how nice you are. She's far prettier than I am, so I got my back up because I didn't want her anywhere near you. She's too pretty. But after a while I noticed that you didn't really look at her so I didn't feel threatened anymore. I realized then that you love me and no woman, no matter how pretty would ever change that. Of course I really don't know about that anymore..."

"Why not?" I asked.

"Because you haven't done your husbandly duties in ten days nine hours and ... forty three minutes," she smirked.

I smiled. "No time like the present," I saithrower eyes lit up and she smiled and nodded.

"What about the garden?" I asked.

"Fuck the garden, Davie," she gushed. "Fuck me!" She quickly grabbed the garden pick off of the deck and threw it into the shed. I remembered when I'd smacked the shit out of myself with it when it had been a rake. I needed to talk to her about putting her tools away, but at that moment I wasn't thinking. We never made it into the house.

Tammy pulled her shorts down and turned off the outside lights. She lay back on one of our lounge chairs and beckoned me over to her as she pulled her shirt over her head.

I stripped my own shorts off as well and just rammed my dick straight into her. There was no foreplay asked for and none was given. I just tried my hardest to punish her. We weren't making love at all. We were just fucking. It was like watching two animals rutting during mating season. And whore that she was, Tammy loved it. Her screams were probably heard all over the neighborhood. At one point I had to put my hand over her mouth to shut her up.

"Ohhh! Davie, fuck me," she screamed. "Yeah, yeah yessssss, baby, yessss!" I picked her up, and carried her into the house and continued my assault on her.

I was like a crack fiend. I knew that what I was doing was wrong, but it couldn't stop. Every time I thought I was spent, she sucked me back to life and urged me on. I was exhausted and so was she, but we continued. When my dick would no longer respond, I switched to my fingers. Finally, Tammy grabbed my hand. "Davie, no more," she begged. "You do know that we can do this some more tomorrow, right? I mean we are married. We don't have to explain anything to anyone. My parents aren't going to jump out of the closet and tell you not to fuck me. I belong to you, remember? Besides, this is all your fault. If you hadn't put a cap on our conjugal activities, we wouldn't be so backed up."

Then she yawned, grabbed my arm, looped a leg over my hip, and snuggled her face into my shoulder. Within moments she was asleep and buzzing lightly.

She'd been wrong on a couple of her points. First, we wouldn't ever do this again if my plan worked. By this time the next night, I'd be alone. And for all intents and purposes our marriage would be over.

The following morning, I felt like a used dishrag. I was wrung out and limp; in more ways than one. It was like a hangover. I felt awful, but I had so many pleasant memories of what it took to get me to feel that way.

And Tammy, she was snoring loudly enough that most bulldozers would be jealous. I kissed her lightly and headed off.

At breakfast, Samantha had a look on her face that I had never seen before. I didn't get one smile out of her. Whatever was on her mind was serious.

I loved watching her eat. She took such tiny delicate bites. And she seemingly savored the flavor of each item on her plate.

Finally when she was done, she looked up at me. "You liked watching me eat," she said. I couldn't tell if it was a statement or a question.

"Good," she said. "I figured out what's going on with you."

I smiled. I couldn't wait to see what she had to say. For some reason she was being really serious. i was sure she knew what I had planned to do to Bob.

"You really confused me for a while," she said. "Yesterday especially. But I understand you now. I thought about it all day. You have a problem, Dave. It's the same one I have. You like me. You like me a lot. But you're torn between Tammy and me. I know that you're married to her, Dave, but there is something going on between her and Bob. They talk far too often. But I know Bob. He'll get sick of begging you for a chance with her and find someone else. So you have a decision to make. Do you care about me as much as I think? Or do you want to see Bob trade me off to someone else? Do you really want to see Bob give me to someone who won't care about me the way I think you do?"

"Okay," I said. "You win. If Bob asks me to do the swapping thing, I'll say yes." I was lying through my teeth but only because I really needed to let her know that I did care about her. It wasn't love. At least I didn't think so. Maybe it was weakness. Maybe I just wasn't ready to be alone and I needed to keep her on my side. At any rate, it was a harmless lie.

There was also the fact that, Samantha was even more in the dark than I was. She didn't realize that Bob was already fucking Tammy. I wondered what she would do when all of the shit hit the fan.

Another problem was that the sex with Tammy the night before was really on my mind. It just seemed like a crime to get rid of a woman who fucked like that. Maybe the answer would be to just punish her. Tammy was clearly afraid of losing me to Samantha. Maybe there was a way to punish both Tammy and Bob. What if I started telling Tammy about how great sex with Samantha was. I could also start telling her how we should probably make the swap permanent. And in the meantime, to get back at Bob, I could get Samantha pregnant.

I was so busy thinking about alternate plans that when I got to work and got swamped because of several problems with the concrete on the second floor, I forgot all about the confrontation with the cheaters. As a matter of fact when Kirk called to tell me that there was nothing wrong with my car and that he'd drop it off at my house, my secretary took the message.

I was inspecting the repairs that had been done to the arch over the main entrance and was very happy with it. I had just told the guys who worked on it that I wished they could do concrete, when the call came. I looked at my cell phone and saw that the call was from Tammy. I don't know why but I answered it.

"Dave, you have to come home now," she said. Her voice had kind of a manic quality to it. I could tell that she had been crying and I remembered what was probably going on.

"I can't come home in the middle of the day," I spat. "I have a hundred things to do."

"Dave, Honey, it's an emergency," she said. "I really need you."

"What kind of emergency?" I asked.

"Honey, it's Bob. He..." I hung up the phone angrily. I wished that I had gone ahead with my plan and confronted her and Bob. I was angry all over again. 'Fuck her and Bob,' I thought.

Bob could have her. All of those stupid old sayings went through my mind. 'You can't turn a hoe into a housewife,' was one saying. 'And once a cheater, always a cheater' was another. The more I thought about it, the more it made sense for Bob to have Tammy and me to have Samantha.

And just as I thought about Samantha, my phone rang again. I answered it, thinking it was Tammy. I was surprised when Samantha's voice came out of the earpiece. "Dave, I really need you," she said. "You have to come home, NOW!"

"What the hell is going on?" I asked. "Why does everyone want me to come home?"

"It's Bob," she began.

"Fuck Bob!" I yelled.

"Your whore of a wife did," she spat. "She fucked him and then she killed him. Your wife killed my husband. I want that whore in jail," she yelled.

I got one of the guys on the crew to drive me home. When I got there, it was a mad house. There were at least five police cars, including one on my lawn. I walked up to the cops and demanded that they get that car off of my grass.

One of the cops looked at me and asked me who I was. I showed him my ID and told him again to get the car off of my lawn. He gestured for one of the other cops who apologized and moved the car. I noticed that two officers were talking to a distraught Tammy and another group of officers was talking to an equally distraught Samantha.

As one they noticed me and then both of them tried to run to me. They got to me at the same time and started fighting each other. The police pulled them apart.

"Can someone tell me what the hell is going on?" I screamed. Just then two burly paramedics pulled a stretcher past us. I looked at the body on the stretcher it was Bob. There was no sheet over him. But for some reason they had a rake on top of him.

"He's alive," I said. The two women's reactions were different.

Tammy seemed to be relieved; Samantha not so much.

An hour later we were all in the hospital's waiting room trying to find out Bob's condition. A police detective wanted to know exactly what had happened.

Tammy seemed not to want to talk about it in front of me. The detective pushed her to answer.

She started crying but no one was moved. "About, three weeks ago, Bob suggested that we try swinging," she began. "My husband absolutely refused. Bob kept trying to convince me that it would be good for all of us. He had all of these reasons. And I guess that Bob had noticed that I can't stand Samantha. He played on my weakness. He told me that it would spice things up in my marriage. But he also told me that it would show Davie once and for all that Samantha might have been prettier than me, but she sucked in bed. I know they were weak excuses and shit, for the past seven years I've been totally faithful to Dave. I guess I just wanted to try someone else just once. At any rate I gave in and we did it. It was okay. Bob has a really big dick. The biggest I've ever had. But it wasn't really good sex.

I felt bad about it. I had never cheated on Davie before and I decided that I never would again. Bob decided that he wanted to continue it, though. He seemed to be fascinated with my body. He kept calling me his hot little slut and a bunch of other stupid nicknames. I told him that I was Dave's little slut, not his. He told me that if I didn't keep fucking him whenever he wanted, that he'd have to tell Dave. He told me that the only way out of it would be to get Dave to go along with it. He had this whole idea in his mind about the four of us starting a swingers group.

So he made little miss stuck up over there, throw herself at my husband. I was really afraid at first, but all it did was to show me that Dave loves me and he wouldn't be fooled by just a pretty face. But I began to see that Bob was right. I was stuck in the middle of a big fucking mess. Dave told me years ago that if I ever cheated on him, we were done. So the only way to save my marriage would be for Dave to go along with it. But he just didn't seem to want Samantha. And every time I suggested it, Dave got angry at me.

Anyway today, Bob came over for his weekly screw and this time he brought another guy with him. As much as I didn't want to do anything with him; the idea of a threesome had me pretty turned on. But as soon as we got undressed, I heard it. It was that low rumbling growl that Dave's Mustang makes. It pulled up in the driveway and I thought that Dave was home. We all panicked. I pushed Bob and the other guy out the back door. I told them to hide in the shed."

That was when Tammy started crying.

"They ran into the shed but as soon as Bob went inside...he stepped on the...and it...and he..." she broke up crying then.

"I ... I ... called 911. He had just fallen and he was jerking like he was having a seizure. The other guy ran away. I ... I didn't know what to do. I was going to pull the thing out of his forehead, but the 911 operator told me not to. I just stood there naked waiting for them. It took them only five minutes to get there but it seemed like forever. Samantha came home and saw all of the police cars and she came into the yard with a bunch of our neighbors. I didn't know what to say to her. She started screaming that I had killed him. I called Dave then."

She looked at me and I glared back at her. "Dave, you have to forgive me. I love you. It was an accident."

"Maybe what happened to Bob was an accident," I said. "But you knew how I felt about cheating." I looked at the officers. "Can I leave?"

They looked at each other and discussed the fact that not only did I not know that Bob and Tammy had been carrying on, but that I hadn't been home when the incident happened.

"Yes Mr. Pike you're free to go. We need to question your wife further. She might need a lawyer. So maybe you should..."

"You heard her," I snapped. "She cheated on me. We're done. She can call her parents. I'm done with her."

"Nooo!" she screamed as I walked out of the room.

I knew. I literally had known that Tammy had cheated on me with Bob. But having it all out in the open had only pissed me off more. I guess deep down inside I'd hoped that there was more to it. I wanted to think that there was some special or redeeming reason for it. But it was just the same old bullshit. Out marriage hadn't needed any spice until Bob came along. And as far as the rest of it. I'd been married to her for the same amount of time and I hadn't cheated.

In a way, I had to look at it as if I was partially responsible for what had happened to Bob. Perhaps it had been the perfect shitstorm of events, but it had been an accident, hadn't it?

On the other hand no one had forced Bob to come over to my house and fuck my wife, so he deserved what he got. And no one had forced Tammy into it either, so she deserved what she got.

I went home. I made myself something to eat and pushed it around a plate for an hour or so. Then I started doing what I always do when I need to think. I washed the Mustang.

I'd been at it for an hour or two when the car pulled up. My father in law got out and slowly walked over towards me.