by redwitch
Beautiful first chapter. Please write something about Davis's love story. Can't wait!
It is nearly impossible to enjoy reading a story that makes it necessary to re-read a line several times to understand what the writer is trying to say. Such as:
""First of all your way to spoiled for anything to ever happen to you".
Did you intend to say:
"First of all you're way too spoiled . . . ."
It changes (or confuses) the original intent when incorrect grammar is used.
"Your" and "you're" are different words with different meanings.
"To", "too" and "two" are also very different words with different meanings.
It is sad to learn that an otherwise excellent story teller with brilliant "word pictures" loses some readers due to a lack of proper expression.
Please solicit the services of a good proofreader with a thorough knowledge of english grammar.
Sincerely,
de Jay
I am glad I stumbled upon you after hours of thrash. Sigh. My palms are tingling in anticipation of a great read!!!!!
such a brilliant portrayal of a narky 10 yr old...kudos. just had to say that before I go and read the next two chapters!
Please comeback I loved all of your stories and I know that life gets in the way but for your fans continue your story.
I'm ready for the next chapter. I loved the other stories that you wrote and I know life gets in the way I just hope you make it back soon.
wow! i hope you will finish this story. and i hope you could also write a story for Davis...
Please continue this story. I adored all the others and I know this one will be just as awesome.
Please update soon!! Your stories are amazing :D And please finish I Love You. That was a great story :)
I know ur busy but PLEASE give me a couple more chapters to tie me over until you can finish.
I don't give a fuck about ur petty mistakes your a fucking gr8 writer. I know you say ur schedule is disatrous but please i beg plead and hope to coerce you to write just alittle bit more. just a bit because waiting is absoulutely killing me!
brittany-from boston
I really like your stories and I know you're trying to find an editor and everything which is good! But maybe if you wrote all your characters names down you wouldn't get them mixed up and just plain wrong. Like the Braxton and Blake mix up in the other story or how you said their last name was Rush in this story when you originally called them Rose.. Just little mistakes but I love your story lines though and as a fan thank you for taking the time to get a editor. :) Brittany from Maryland
You seirously need to update this! It's so wonderful! I'm happy there is a story about Dante and Tempest!
Can't even imagine what a grumpy man Dante will grow up to be but I'd love to find out! Looking forward to more!
is quite a character, I take it Tempest will be the bane of his existence...enjoyed.
I am so happy your back , and i know it is going to be just as good as the other stories. I would like to ask are you going to finsh I love you?
wow!! you are back. the first chapter is promising. i can't wait to read more. write fast pleaseee...u kept us in suspense. :) i love that you are back. :)
it's nice that you did a story on dante...it'd be better if u had some editing done though, the grammatical errors lessen the quality of the story...good story nonetheless
the stones are back and i do hope everybody is involved again
I just want to let you know that I LOVE the story of Diago and Bianca and I'm so happy that you have decided to continue! I've read your stories so many times and I can't wait to do that with this one!
I'm so glad that you are finally during Dante and Tempest story. Looking forward to reading more.
I am so glad that you finally posted a new story. I can't wait to see what happened. I love love love your stories.