All Comments on 'The Girl(slut) Next Door'

Once I got to the ether I knew you'd crossed the line.

I read that far, then read the end, and realized what you were trying for.

If you want to write a non-con it has to have either the fantasy element or the active participation of the 'victim' in creating the scenario for her 'victimization'. Even the last is crossing the line, depending on how it is written.

The reason I say this is that sexual assault (rape), even in fantasy, should never be encouraged lest a reader be pushed further towards doing so. Think of your mother, sister or daughter being assaulted and suddenly the idea of someone watching them while fantasizing about raping them doesn't seem like entertainment anymore. At least I hope to God it does not!

Solution: Have Tony find the letter while setting up a cam to spy on Sarah, thus leading him to knowing what she is into, and inspire him to action.

Set the scenario where he catches her naked out of the shower and restrain her, but do not drug her, or you cross the line.

Alternative: Have him search for and find incriminating information along the lines of his threat via phone that allows him to 'reluctantly' submit to him and allow him to set the stage.

In restraining or blackmailing her, lay out the demands that she submit - she can resist, but ultimately submit as is her nature.

1 star as written, yet the potential is there for so much more.

J

Haven't read this story. Just saw your self righteous comment "J" and had to reply. Seriously. No one is allowed to have rape fantasies? Writing noncon is encouraging readers to go rape people? Are you a complete idiot? I'm a woman. I love noncon. I've been reading it for years. I'm not about to run off and rape anyone nor am I about to run down the street naked in a dark alley hoping to be raped, because I, like other adults reading this genre, know the difference between fantasy and reality. Anyone who doesn't is unhinged and reading a rape story isn't going to change that. Good lord. Censorship of harmless stories because it gets your knickers in a knot is dangerous and pathetic. Go play in a sandpit or something please and leave the noncon section well alone.

Um. You do realise, don't you, that blackmailing someone into having sex with them IS IN FACT STILL RAPE? just checking. Sorry to burst your nonsensical bubble there.

Well developed. Obviously, you stopped to write for Literotica (dates of publishing).

Why? I would like to read more!

Great story, horrible ending. It was set up for a great ending, too.