The Joust

"I warned you, Radley," Ratafian rasped.

"And I was going to talk to him, I swear. But he relaxed me too well. It reminded me of times past when Stephen would massage me."

"Is it Sebastian your heart desire, Radley or would any warm body have sufficed?" Ratafian asked. He saw Radley's hand reach for where his sword would normally hang, the bigger man's face darkening with anger. "I will not see the boy hurt. He is an innocent and he has fallen hard for you. If you do not return those feelings..."

"I do," Radley groaned, his hand dropping to his side. "May God forgive me for the way I have behaved, but I do. He may only have been with us a few days, but it is as though he has always been with us. I love his smile, the sound of his voice. I feared to face my desires in part because I could scarce believe he would care for me and in part because if I lose this joust, I will have to take part in another or forfeit my castle. Help me, Ratafian, please."

"Oh, Radley," Ratafian sighed. "Although you have loved you have never been in love and the two are quite, quite different. Wait here. I will find and speak to Sebastian."

Ratafian had little trouble tracking Sebastian to where he stood, tears falling soundlessly, by the riverbank where they talked together.

"Come here, Sebastian," Ratafian whispered and gathered the silently weeping youth into his arms. "Stephen is no rival for your attention. He died before we last left the Holy Land. He was bright and beautiful and Radley was as captivated as others before and as others would have been again. He was not for settling down and being faithful to just one. Radley was a Knight with standing and wealth and Stephen liked that. He also wished to travel and so came with us on our last campaign. He survived the battle only to die of a fever." His kissed Sebastian's brow easing the slender form from his body to look into the tear-filled eyes.

"I warned you that Radley has been reluctant to care for anyone since. He was betrayed during our first campaign and suffered loss in the second and these weighed heavily upon him. He was taken by surprise at how quickly you breached his defences to touch his heart. Loneliness gnaws on his soul and he feared you might not care as much for him as he does for you. I should just knock your heads together," Ratafian added.

A shocked, choked, snuffle had the older man smiling softly as Sebastian rubbed away fallen tears to look into Ratafian's eyes.

"I...I love him, Ratafian," Sebastian sniffed. "Are you sure he feels the same?"

"Very sure. Now wash your face and let us return."

Sebastian obeyed the older man and allowed himself to be meekly led back to the pavilion. He could see Radley sitting outside, having donned his shift, his distraught face brightening with hope as they came into sight.

"Wait here a few minutes," Ratafian ordered as Radley surged to his feet and looked at Sebastian.

Radley did not know what to say and it seemed Sebastian was just as tongue-tied. Both looked with relief as Ratafian finally exited the pavilion, calling Ox's name.

"Yes, Ratafian?" the big man asked as he lumbered over.

"I want you to sit here. I need to stretch my legs and will walk a while around the tent. No one is to disturb Radley and Sebastian whilst they talk and resolve things between them. Now you two are to go inside and be honest with each other. And, Radley, mind what I have told you," he added, nodding at Sebastian's back as the younger man slipped inside first.

****

Inside the pavilion, Sebastian had stopped and was staring. Radley joined him in his appraisal. There were a couple of lamps on the ground by their pallet. They were not their usual practical lamps, but ones decorated with coloured glass which gave the tent an opulent glow. The brazier burned warmly, adding heat as well as light. Finally, incense was thick in the air. To Radley, the lighting and the scent of damask rose spoke of love and seduction. The Knight shook his head, smiling. Ratafian seemed to think of everything. He knew he had to let his heart speak.

"Do you find me desirable, Sebastian?" Radley asked, turning to the young man at his side. His eyes were as hard as chips of diamond, the blue as sharp as honed steel. "Is there more between us than mere attraction?"

"I do, my Lord," Sebastian replied. "I...I also find myself feeling things for you that I have never felt for another. I...I love you."

The last words were so softly spoken that Radley could scarcely believe he had heard them. The younger man's head had dropped, hiding his exquisite beauty. Radley tipped it up with his finger to gaze deep into sapphire depths.

"Ratafian, he...he explained about Stephen," Sebastian whispered, his eyes searching Radley's face and alighting with hope at what they saw; warmth, affection and another emotion that Sebastian dare not, as yet, give a name.

"By all that is Holy, Sebastian, I love you, too," Radley said hoarsely. "I beg your forgiveness for speaking another's name. Let me show you 'tis you and only you that I love."

The quietly spoken words were all it had taken to set ablaze the tinder of Radley's need. He pulled Sebastian close, caressing the auburn curls and wrapping an arm around the slim waist allowing himself the luxury of touching what he had desired. Their lips finally met and Radley felt himself consumed by the heat of his need, its fire burning through his body as he possessed the young man's sweet mouth. The feeling of rightness he felt holding Sebastian amazed the older man. This was something he had not experienced before. He tightened his grip and licked at the full lips, requesting they part. He rumbled approvingly, deep in his chest, as his tongue pushed into Sebastian's mouth. He explored and tasted every nuance growling as Sebastian's tongue slid tentatively to caress his own. The hesitancy reminded him of Ratafian's warning.

"Sebastian?" Radley whispered, their lips still touching. "Am I your first?"

"Yes, my Lord," Sebastian said softly. "I am chaste."

The older man felt heat rush through him at the innocent confession. It was one thing for Ratafian to have warned him, another to hear it said with such honesty from the young man he held. Trust shone from Sebastian's lapis lazuli orbs and Radley wanted to merit that trust. He could feel his lance throb, already hard from the single kiss, but banked down his desire. He had to think of Sebastian, of the enormous gift that was in his arms. The younger man may offer himself willingly but he was an innocent, a virgin in every sense.

By contrast, Radley was an experienced and skilled lover but in truth, as he thought back, Ratafian was right once again. He had never been in love. Not even with Stephen. This was so much more, so different from anything else. Here it was about giving rather than taking. He had to take his time, patience and care at the forefront of his mind, because this young man was special. Radley ran his knuckles down the soft skin of Sebastian's cheek and traced the outline of his lush lips with a gentle fingertip. He smiled and replaced his finger with his mouth, pressing a soft kiss to the alluring lips.

The Knight could scarcely believe that this was happening. That he was here with an earth-bound angel in his arms who loved him. He gave in to the temptation of the sinfully succulent lips once more, taking them in a kiss that left both men breathless. Radley trailed his fingers through the curls at Sebastian's neck. The young man's breathing growing apace as Radley nuzzled closer and he could see the pulse at the exposed throat fluttering as Sebastian's heart raced.

"You do not fear me, do you?" he asked softly, his eyes searching the beautiful visage.

"Never, my Lord, though I am nervous. I wish to please you and know naught of lovemaking."

"Just having you here, in my arms, pleases me," Radley murmured. Even this was beyond what he could ever have wished for. He slid his hand up the loose shift Sebastian wore to stroke a hand down the satiny skin of Sebastian's back. He licked at an ear, enjoying the shiver that ran through the supple body. He pressed soft kisses to a cheek, then down Sebastian's throat before moving back up to the other ear. Sebastian breathed a moan and Radley took his lips once more, allowing the kiss to deepen in intensity until their tongues were wrapped together in an intricate embrace. Radley carefully lowered Sebastian fully onto their pallet. The young man's mouth was reddened and kiss-swollen and Radley bent down to taste more of the honeyed sweetness.

"Oh, my Lord," Sebastian murmured. He was beyond words, almost beyond thinking and could not express the feelings the intimacy invoked. He watched as Radley removed his shift and then sat up at the gentle insistence and allowed his own to be removed before settling once more at Radley's side.

Sebastian's chest was hairless and as smooth as silk, his alabaster skin shimmering in the light from the lamps. Radley trailed his hand lightly across Sebastian's collarbones. He kissed and licked a teasing path to first one hard nipple and then the other. He heard a startled gasp and looked up to see Sebastian staring at him with wide eyes.

"Feel good, angel?" Radley asked, leaning down to lick to each juicy nubbin once again.

"Yes, my Lord," Sebastian moaned.

As Radley lapped at Sebastian's nipples, he could see the young man's member straining against the flimsy fabric of his hose. He suckled more insistently at the proud peaks, smiling victoriously as he watched the still-hidden manhood twitch in concert with each movement of his tongue.

Sebastian tentatively touched Radley's skin. It was one thing to have rubbed oil into Radley's back, but another entirely to be free to touch more intimately. There were white marks, scars from Radley's battles and Sebastian's heart ached in empathy for what the older man must have endured. He looked up as he trailed his fingertips through the thick hair of Radley's chest.

"You are so masculine," he whispered. "So magnificent."

"What is wrong?" Radley asked, pulling Sebastian to him, as the touches seemed to falter. His skin seemed more alive under the small fingers and he felt bereft as they lifted from his body.

"You look how a man should, whereas I am, just me," Sebastian murmured.

"Look at me, Sebastian," Radley instructed softly and the young man obeyed. "You are beautiful. Do you know what I thought when I first saw you? I thought you were an angel fallen to Earth. There is nothing I would change of you." Radley's reward for the honest, heart-felt words was a smile that seemed to light up their tent.

He kissed the full mouth and stroked the smooth chest. As his hands moved lower and brushed across the soft belly Sebastian began to sigh and moan. Despite the layer still between them, Radley could swear he felt the heat of Sebastian's organ. He slowly pulled his mouth away, peppering tiny kisses to Sebastian's cheeks and neck before dipping lower to cover satin-soft skin with butterfly touches. Sebastian was writhing rhythmically, breathing breathy moans. The Knight placed his hand at the waistband of Sebastian's hose. He slid his hand inside, stroking Sebastian's lightly-furred groin, before lowering the material to free the tumescent organ within. The slender shaft arched towards Radley's hand and the older man obeyed its silent command, encircling it firmly. Sebastian responded with a cry and a thrust and Radley knew the innocent young man would not last.

He kissed Sebastian again and began to stroke the hard rod firmly, swirling his thumb in the liquid-diamond droplets weeping freely from the tip. It did not take long. It was but mere seconds before the combination of Sebastian's inexperience and arousal and Radley's skill made the young man spurt. His cries of completion were muted by Radley's lips and tongue. The older man soothed the pulsating flesh through its completion before carefully licking Sebastian clean. He pulled the hose back up, coving Sebastian's nudity.

As the younger man lay boneless, barely aware of what was taking place, Radley straddled the slender form He roughly shoved his own hose down enough to free his rampant member. He wrapped Sebastian's hand around it, encircling his own around both, and pumped vigorously. There was no finesse, just the need for quick release. He spurted over the youthful chest, groaning through clenched teeth as his body jerked to send droplets of his release to glint like gems against the young man's skin. He rubbed his cream into the recumbent body before aiding a somnambulant Sebastian into his shift.

Hastily donning his own, he strode to the tent flaps and peered through. Ox still sat unmoving outside. Ratafian appeared as if he had been circling their pavilion. Which, knowing Ratafian, was likely to be what the thin man had been doing. Radley nodded to his self-appointed guardians and they slowly made their way inside. The incense was still heavy in the air, masking any other scent. As Radley moved to rejoin the slumbering Sebastian, Ratafian tended the brazier and Ox lay down on the pallet he shared with the thin man.

"You and the little angel are good for each other," Ox said as he settled.

Ratafian and Radley exchanged glances. It was rare for the big man to make such proclamations. They smiled at each other. Things were going from good to better.

****

Sebastian sat on the pallet he had become so accustomed to sharing with Radley. He missed the Knight's warmth and solidity and felt bereft without the older man to lie with. It amazed him to think just how quickly Radley had become essential in his life. He sighed quietly, but not quietly enough.

"Not able to sleep, Sebastian?" Ratafian's voice floated over. "It will be a bit of a squeeze, but you can share with us, if Ox promises not to roll over and crush us." The older man hoped to lighten the younger man's mood. It had not gone unnoticed how melancholy Sebastian had been without Radley to tend.

"I would not hurt the little angel," Ox huffed. "He can sleep with us."

"I am sorry if I disturbed you," Sebastian murmured. "I just cannot settle."

Ratafian smiled as he watched Sebastian crawl over to the other pallet but he looked so forlorn that Ratafian's heart ached. The older man raised the cover he shared with Ox and settled Sebastian to lie with the younger man's back against his own chest. He slipped an arm around the trim waist and felt Sebastian relax back against him.

"He is not in danger in Sir Allard's castle," Ratafian assured. "Several Knights have been invited there to a banquet for those still remaining in the joust, nothing more. Allard will want to show off his wealth to the others."

"I cannot explain it," Sebastian sighed. "I just have an unsettled feeling. I saw Edmund with a couple of the others that made up the party. I did not like the look on his face," he added with a shudder.

"Radley is a match and more for Edmund," Ratafian said, sending a silent prayer he was right. Things had been going well in the joust and the older man would not put it past Edmund to try some deviousness to put Radley off in some way. "All will be well in the morning. Sleep, little angel." He pressed a kiss to Sebastian's temple, but his own sleep was a long time coming.

****

When morning came, things went from bad to worse. Ratafian stared at Radley as the Knight made his way towards their pavilion. It was clear to the thin man that Radley suffered from surfeit of drink. The other man's expression was bleary and Ratafian was grateful Radley did not have a joust that day. Then his sharp eyes narrowed at the sight of the ribbon, the violet ribbon that the Lady Charissa was so fond of, that was attached high on the shoulder of Radley's doublet. He made a move forward and cursed silently as Sebastian took the same moment to appear from the pavilion. He heard the shocked gasp and stifled sob and glanced back to see the younger man running for all he was worth. Ox stood too far away to be of help in stopping Sebastian's flight but, in truth, until Ratafian had spoken to Radley it was perhaps better to let the young man go. Ratafian was certain the auburn-haired beauty had run to his home. His flight was towards the town, not the river.

He strode forward to impel Radley into the pavilion with greater speed as unobtrusively as possible. It was fortunate they had set their tent away from the main field and that neither the other Knights nor any of their servants were near. Growling angrily he shoved Radley inside, spinning the groaning man to face him.

"Sorry, Ratafian," Radley muttered thickly. "I had no intent to drink much and I am certain I did not. I think it might have been spiked in some way."

"Then you do not remember agreeing to wear the Lady Charissa's favour?" Ratafian snapped.

"Of course not," Radley said. He then gasped as Ratafian drew some of the ribbon from where it was secured up high on his shoulder. "I do not know how it got there," he said frantically. "There was talk of who was likely to wear it. I seem to remember Edmund's name, but I would not. You know I would not." His eyes cast desperately around. "Sebastian?" he whispered hoarsely.

"He saw it," Ratafian said flatly. "And ran. This is the second time you have had him in tears, Radley. As you value our friendship do not do so a third." He pulled the offensive adornment from its perch.

"I berated my brother for being a fool and letting himself fall into debt. I have done much worse," Radley said. "I have to go to him."

"Go to the river and clean yourself up first. Do not go as Radley the Knight but as just Radley the man. Tell Miriam that I would not have sent you if I did not trust you and that I implore her to give you a chance alone with Sebastian. I feel sorry for Charissa. She is as much the victim of this as you are. She has inherited none of her mother's delicacy of features or build; she is like her all-too-solid father. Little wonder none wish her favour. That was probably Allard's alternative reason for the banquet. If he had sired a pretty, little thing, one of the Knights would be wearing her ribbon by now. Money cannot always buy happiness."

"You will take care of the ribbon?" Radley asked.

Ratafian saw the anguish in his friend's eyes and knew Radley was hurting as much as Sebastian. He needed them to get together as quickly as possible to mend near-broken hearts.

"I will. Now hurry."

****

"My Lady Charissa, a word with you if I may, aside from the crowd?" Ratafian asked in his softest of voices. He had kept a watchful eye for the Lady; certain she would come looking for the Knight wearing her favour. He was surprised she had not come directly to Radley. She was dressed in her favourite violet, a heavy silk dress with gold brocade at the décolletage and the hem. Violet ribbon in satin accented a solid waist, making it seem even thicker. The dress was far too fussy for one who lacked delicacy of build.

"You are one of Sir Radley's men," Charissa nodded. "Very well." She walked a few feet away from her ladies-in-waiting and turned to face the thin man. "Why do we have need of distance from my attendants?" she asked.

"This is yours is it not, milady?" Ratafian asked, allowing but a quick glimpse at the ribbon he held. Her stifled gasp was answer enough. "I do not believe that Sir Radley came to ask you personally to wear your favour. Perhaps it was suggested by Sir Edmund?" he added.

"Sir Edmund did indeed ask for my ribbon. He said that by today one of the Knights would be wearing it. They were contesting between themselves for my favour. I was swept up by his manners and passed it over without knowing for certainty who would wear it. I had it whispered to me that Sir Radley was the Knight to seek out. I know I am not pretty, but I did not think Sir Radley would insult me so openly."