by OzEliot
I loved the twist at the end...did not see it coming!
I am normally put off by more than three pages but you really have talent. Five stars
For your time reading, your kind comments, and your generous votes, thank you very much. Writers work in a vacuum unless someone offers their thoughts in these ways.
I actually came up with the ending first, it was the idea that inspired the rest of the story. The rest followed and fortunately, hopefully others agree, made a story about envy a little more R-rated.
I like to overwrite, as some people might agree. The story is the broad strokes on the canvas, all of the rest is the detail. Those things that don't seem to directly matter to the story are sometimes the foundation, the background elements, that can really bring an imagined world to life. The stories may not be for everyone, but I like to stretch the concept of what's "necessary" to telling the tale.
I found the start a little confusing but I am glad I stuck with it. I am afraid I did see the twist coming quite early but it was well executed.