by spyce
It is a nice intro. You might wanna grab hold of a volunteer editor for some technicalities here and there. (Proper punctuation around dialogue and such things.) Or just read up on it somewhere.
Any chance you can pop a pm, or anonymous feedback, my way when the next chapter is up? I'm curious what will happen next.
I'd give you four stars because of the technical issues, but gonna give you five because you caught my interest in spite of that.