by Useli
Wonderful read!!!
Two things tho....
one: get an editor because not only do the tense of the words change so do the perspectives and it's a little confusing.
second: don't stop you are doing a great job with the story.
with some of the other comments. It is a brilliant piece of fantasy, well worked out and believable characters and a story line that makes you wish for more. But the past/ present mix up is there, though I'm reading too superficially to have a problem with that, and the spelling can do with ironing out. An editor probably would be helpfull, though some thorough proof reading by yourself might be enough.
I tend to have a similar problem with past/ present, but usually can get it straight on the first proof reading.
Good story but it's distracting not only the tense changes but also simple repeated mistakes like "eye's" . Be great if you can find an editor.
Cheers
Love your main character, good story but I hate being left hanging!
You write well for the most part, but you should really get an editor. The constant switching between the past and present tenses is annoying.
You my friend are a truly gifted and engaging author,do keep 'em chapters coming!