All Comments on 'The Seduction of Ada Ch. 02'

The first part was much better. I hope that the third part makes up for this part. There was entirely too much teasing without action in this part. You could have written more eroticism into it on this part.

I suggest you look on another site, such as Preggoman.com or KristinArchives.com, at some stories I've written as "Dr.T", if you want an idea on how to write erotica.

don't let this go the way it appears - that would just be too heartbreaking. Anxiously awaiting chapter 3.

Top marks for writing skills. The phrase "Then in the early morning bright, the birds at the window singing a melody so pure... I would change the diaper laden with the fruits of growth. A task odiferous but filled with love." would make a Shakespeare jealous! However, I don't like the way this is going, this girl has suffered enough. It appears that she is about to be gang raped and I hope that Timmy the bartender warns David and that he can get there fast with his proven combat skills! I'll hold judgement until Ch.3 so don't keep us waiting too long. Pete.

I hardly ever comment, but to see such a creodont as this don87 what ever, think a romance is an erotic coupling. He only wants to see stories of other men impregnating his wife as happened to him in real life. Which in it’s self is sad. He is always the same, and no one pays him any mind. You have such a history of great stories it’s funny to see a want-to-be giving his drunken advise how to write a story. The story is very good.

You are killing me here. I waited 4 freaking days to read this because I knew you'd leave me hanging at the end of Ch2 and I was trying to wait until they were both out. Now I've got to wait longer for Ch3. You're lucky you are a good writer. Story was good, evenly told, I like the touch of poetry without getting carried away, and the pacing was excellent.

It would take a lot to believe that David could move on so quickly after the pain of losing his wife. Ada would take a long time too. Now that you made me care about them, I've got to wait...you bum. I don't believe for a second you're going to make us live through her being hurt again, I sense something cool coming.

The only negatives are that it's a little hard to swallow that the first guy she dances with also uses a date-rape drug on her (it's not quite that common). I'll live with it because I like the story, but I wish you had found a different way.

Excellent story, I'm anxiously looking forward to the conclusion.

She ought to be much more gun shy - this is the same game she fell for the first time - not even a new wrinkle really.