All Comments on 'The Weekend Pt. 05'

Good chapter! I'm interested to see how the story ends.

I never got The Weekend out of my head. I’m glad you’re bringing it to a conclusion. Brian sure is an interesting recurring character for you. You can’t seem to get rid of him yet. A lot of loose strings to tie off here. I’m looking forward to seeing where you take them. Good to see your new submission. Thank you.

You can see the terrible pain coming but can’t turn away.

Glad you are finishing this, hope life becomes easier for you. The writing as usual is excellent, even if the subject is painful.

The synopsis was a good idea when there are time gaps in a story. No apologies are necessary. Working, living and having time for writing isn't easy. 5*

I gave you a five star rating for the Brian beatdown alone. Looking forward to the conclusion.

With all due respect, it's been almost eight months since the last chapter, with one more chapter yet to go.

I MAY go back and reread Chs 1-4 after ch 6 posts, but I think you may have lost me.

Thanks for the continued tale.

I hope you dig into all their questions and insecurities and answer them.

You do excellent work in describing the wounding of each other and the questions that arise from the wounding. Please answer them all.

Lee's wounding of Regina still smacks of more accidental and altruistic intent where Regina's were viciously intentional.

Big clocks aren't a real threat unless a gal is a size queen.

My Mrs.had a first husband that was more than "rather large" and she didn't enjoy the sex that much.

I had her making animal noises and having seizure level orgasms the first week we were dating.

Nearly 30 years later, my smaller equipment hasn't seemed to be anything less than her all time favorite toy.

Always enjoy your work.

Time pieces are apparently important for sexual satisfaction!

Phone typing...

I never thought I’d see another chapter of this story. Hell, I thought Javmor had left us for good. (And who could blame him?) I’d call this a Christmas miracle, but it’s a few days too late.

Gina made the comment “when did my life become a soap opera?” It’s funny, because that’s exactly what I was thinking about this story. There is so much emotional angst in every chapter, it feels exhausting.

I was really, really, hoping you would write a story of redemption for Brian. He has been a classic mustache-twirling villain for so long, it would have been insanely entertaining to see you turn his character around and become one of the “good guys.” Like Jamie Lannister on Game of Thrones, who went from a purely evil man who pushed a little boy out a window in Episode One to the sympathetic character we root for today. Alas, you went in the opposite direction and turned Brian into King Joffrey.

I see the next chapter as nothing more than tying a pretty ribbon around this saga. Lee and Gina seem destined to be reconciled. If Brian returns it will only be to set up the final confrontation where he winds up dead (in a way that doesn’t land Lee or Gina in jail.) If this were a blackrandi story, Jennifer would move in with Lee and Gina and become a polyamorous arrangement, but since it isn’t, I can only assume Jennifer and her son remain a part of Lee’s life, and they part on friendly terms.

I thank you for returning to the writer’s chair, Javmor. I’m still waiting for my muse to seduce me into returning. Happy New Year to you.

I do not like waiting months for a follow up and your synopsis was the absolute least you owe your readers.

Now that we got that unpleasantness out of the way.

Your stories rarely just scratch the surface. It is a selling point of your stories. We get both sides.

That being said, don't like the wife much. I can empathize with her SOME. Husband is stuck in a vice.

I am interested in seeing how you finish this up. Tomorrow. Or maybe the day after the day after. Next week is really pushing it. Don't be that writer.

Great chapter. Love the direction you took. Looking forward to the conclusion. And by conclusion I mean wife gets pregnant from their after jail sex.....come on, they both screwed up, let's give them an HEA.

He hasn't lost his touch for showing the raw emotional pain a couple can go through over betrayals. It is somewhat hypnotic to vicariously experience that pain through the character's perspectives, allowing you to insulate yourself from the full impact. This chapter brings a breakthrough of sorts in their marital relationship and gives Lee a bittersweet moment of revenge that will have its own repercussions.

Love, pain, violence and drama. What's not to like?

First, thanks for finally bringing the STORY to a conclusion. I was very vocal in my criticism of the incomplete original work. But this chapter more than made up for it. 5*s for sure!

The fact that Gina and Lee are now communicating is a good first step for them.

And I pretty much knew that the scumbag side of Brian was gonna come out again. It was masterful how you set up his beat down. First you got the real Brian to show up again making your readers hate him even more. And then the ass kicking that Lee gave him was even more satisfying because of the setup. Brilliant! I just hope Lee doesn't go to jail. I actually felt my fists slamming into Brian as Lee was pounding on him. Only a really good writer could have that effect on his readers. Awesome,

Bravo and thank you.

I went to your page and started looking at the other four chapters. Then I remembered that you had always stated with what had happened in the previous chapters. I went ahead and reread four because I was sure that I had read that Lee had only cheated the one time.

I was glad that Lee finally had his confrontation with Brian.

Last I still feel that Jennifer lied about Lee being the father.

I look forward to number six.

"All she could do is stand there and watch both of the men in her life disappear"

In unguarded moments, she still considers Brian one of the men in her life, after all that. Must have been one hell of a dick.

I know you're probably not going to, but please let these two divorce and move on. Jennifer is pissed, but she'll get over it. His son needs him and there's nothing but a shell and a lifetime of denial there for him with Regina anymore.

But these people are unlikable psychopaths. There isn't a lick of sense between any of them. Send them each to a different part of the planet and be done with it.

I'm afraid that there's nothing Lit can do. because they have no way of knowing when someone submits a Ch 1, when Ch 2 will be posted, and/or how many chapters there will be and when THEY'LL be posted.

I DO agree with your basic point. Using myself as an example, I've started writing a follow-up to one of my stories. I have completed part one of what I see as a three part story. Unfortunately, parts two and three are little more than outlines, so the first pat is in limbo until I finish. At this point I don't know if it will be one long story, one story with internal chapters, or three separate chapters, but if so, they will be submitted very close together.

Good writing, strong characters and plot, believeable dialogue, plausible actions with realistic consequences, everything I look for in a story.

Great job. And special appreciation for the chapter recaps!

5*

This has been going on for far too long. Either they divorce or stay married together, the insecurities will always bite their ass. They need to move on already. Divorce is the only answer for this. If they can move on from this after divorce, then good for them.

In a perfect story (although not for Jennifer), Jennifer somehow dies (car accident, etc) leaving the child that has been a big missing in Gina and Lee's marriage available for their adopting.

This couple is like a tragedy. So much there for them to be together, yet so much damage and memories to be together. Sometimes as much love as there might be you need to go your seperate ways. Sometimes too much happens to move forward together anymore.

While I'm always about the kids, Lee ending up with Jennifer is a mistake. There is no love there, on either side so far. Who knows maybe there could be eventually.

Even with the 5 month absense Gina doesn't end up with Brian and Lee doesn't end up with Jennifer. That is telling I believe.

The other angle may be that Jennifer was slightly portrayed as the wild child in the way her father saw her. Is that an opening where in the next chapter she starts regretting having the child and agrees to let Lee have him and he brings the child back to Regina, and all three become a family?

Lee and Regina have the love where Lee and Jennifer do not. Lee and Jennifer have a baby, which is a huge missing for Lee and Regina. Lee minus Jennifer plus child plus Regina seems to be a formula that works. It's the elegant solution, be it a bit Hollywood.

Lots of possibilities.

You Sir, have a talent, a gift, an deep understanding of human behavior... whatever you want to call it, you writing has more than just the words on a page that tell a story; You write of the human condition. And not just of one sex either, you can write the deepest inner thoughts of man and woman so well, even a simple minded old fool like me can see the things from my own life in a different way; see the wrongdoings I made of things. I don’t know how you can pack so much meaning into your words when others who write similar things can’t. Again Sir, you are truly talented.

Like another commenter stated, this story definitely has a soap opera feel to it. The author is excellent at showing and describing the emotions the characters have and are experiencing internally and with each other. However, as in a soap opera, when it appears as if one plot line is being addressed, another plot line is opened up.

It will be interesting to see if the author allows Lee to go to jail. I can't see Brian not going for prosecuting him to the fullest. Lee's beatdown of Brian, as many have cheered for and think he deserved, went way beyond protecting Regina (which may be questionable to begin with) and into the criminal realm. Another wrench thrown into the works to be resolved.

Personally I don't see Lee and Regina staying married. Lee's main complaint with Regina is that she seemed to have one foot out the door of their marriage and was basically auditioning Brian and looking at him as Lee's replacement. She was totally concerned only about herself and that hasn't changed. She hasn't mellowed, although she has done some reflection on what her role has been in all this drama. I don't get the impression that she has really changed.

The child isn't his obviously but some reverend. They are both named malcolm. Not sure why he just assumed it was his. I think she did to much damage to the relationship AND to her husband for them to reconcile.

Sorry; but he is. Whether planned or a moment of weakness, he cheated on his wife.

He expected forgiveness and her undying devotion; but she cheats and it’s game over. That’s not a marriage, that’s a dictatorship.

She should move on with her life and find s man who loves her for her, who appreciates who she is and what she has, and Lee isn’t it because in the end, he is a dad to a child he fathered when he had his opportunity to cheat. And yes, I don’t believe it was a moment of weakness, it was an excuse to cheat.

I think you are a very talented writer even if this isn't one of your best. I think the problem with the story is that you created two selfish characters who can't communicate. I don't know how you are going to be able to finish of this story with one more chapter. You missed covering a few important points. How does Lee know that the baby is his? He only had sex with her once and he knows nothing about what she was doing with others. Why is Jennifer, who has no help, resisting his help? She came to him (Gina) when she was pregnant. Has Gina gotten any counseling? She seems to be able to see that she is the source of trouble for both of "her men." Why was there no discussion between her and Lee when she found him delivering food and diapers to Jennifer about what he was doing? Lee didn't promise the baby to take care of him, he made a vow to himself to do it.

The last time Lee and Gina talked, she didn't deny that she loved Brian even though she told Brian that the next time she saw him. Now five months have gone past and there is no indication that anything has changed. How could two people who claim to love each other not make any effort in that time to communicate? After Gina tells Lee that she hasn't been romantic with Brian, Lee sees Brian get aggressive against her in the parking lot. Rather than come to her aid when Gina was being assaulted, Lee beats up Brian after he challenges his manhood and brags about fucking Gina. Hard to believe that the patient Lee would commit aggravated assault against an unconscious man. Lee would be in serious trouble, it would have been better for a simple kick in the balls or a bloody nose. Lee is in serious trouble.

I don't see much growth in the characters. Lee and Jennifer just have the baby together. She was all over him before the pregnancy but now she isn't interested in him. Having her give the baby to Gina and Lee would be the simple solution but there is nothing to show that they should be together. I think that is the problem you are having writing this story.

I hope you have a Happy New Year and write lots of great stories. Your fan,

reasonable man

Its was great day one, really good day two, but by now we just want it to be over. And that's not right.

You are trying to gild the cheeseburger, and it ain't nothing but a cheeseburger. Way too long to resolve the reality of their marriage, which you keep trying to obscure to keep the drama and the story flowing. Why? She is fucked up because of a miscarriage and the fear that her sterility has doomed her marriage. So she dooms her marriage by fucking another man during a weekend practicing for a honeymoon. As payback for her husband doing to another woman what he cannot do to her, father a child.

We knew all of this several chapters back. Yeah, beating down Brian was Schweet, but it was cheap theater. It added greatly to our satisfaction, but nothing to the plot.

It's time to move the plot onto some other component of the story, or end it and the marriage. You already told us that Regina is still focused entirely on her own feelings, her sense of loss, her envy: "She would gladly let him fuck that whore's brains out if it meant he wasn't up there doing something even worse; like spending time with that goddamned kid." So Regina thinks the man she wanted to be the father of her children would, should, abandon his son? Regina is unqualified to be any man's wife not because she is a whore and a slut. She is incapable of being a wife because she cannot subsume her desires and appetites for the betterment of her marriage. Regina wanted to be the martyr, Regina wanted to be the dying swan, Regina wanted to be the femme fatale for the workplace Lothario. Regina's life is first, last, and always about what Regina wants, and fuck everybody else.

We are tired of Regina. Give us something new and interesting about this plot, or give it an ending. Lee should either marry Jennifer, or somehow get Jennifer to allow Lee and Regina to adopt Malcom. Or if you are really perverse you could have Lee divorce Regina, hook up with Jennifer, only to find out later that he is not really Malcom's father. But that would be too easy.

Good luck with however you turn this worm. Thanks for your time and talent.

Finally! Lee and Gina begin to talk. But best of all, Brian gets his predator ass kicked again. If he lives, maybe he will leave married women alone. He really showed his true colors, so maybe Regina can see him clearly now. There is an obvious spark remaining between her and Lee, that needs to flame. I am a BTB guy first, but I want these two damaged people to reconcile somehow. Jenny and Malcom have to fit in here somewhere, but it can work out. Joe wants Brian's reputation rehabbed, but after seeing his true colors in two Javmor stories, I don't see that happening. He's that guy we all know, and love it when he fails. Really looking forward to the finale. Should be great.

I'm a fan of your stories, and am glad you finally had someone work Brian over. Also hoping you keep Lee and Regina together although some folks will go nuts on here if you do. anyway, enjoying the story and many thanks for posting it.

Thanks

...and there is a child whose needy innocence is most powerful

Brilliant, yet hurtful and everything in between. Drama galore. If this author is not in your favorites, they should be. Always a pleasure to see another story posted. Idiots who low score this writer because of the way the characters are portrayed are the worse. Such detailed stories come from this author, why not a higher score? Morons. Just a hint for any reader passing by on commenting. If ANY writer here makes you angry, well then good. The writer created a piece of art that irritates you. Think for just a moment. The author made you loss contact with reality and sucked you into the story. The readers emotions (IMHO) were affected. Hence, a lower score. That's the genius of the story great teller. No matter what I read, I would never judge a story by the emotions the reader brought out of me at the time of reading. Did the writer make me angry at the outcome? Brilliant! The writer created an imaginary world I fell into and got lost in. That is genius. Please consider this when handing out stars. So many terrific stories here are shot down for nonsense. Anyway, thanks for your story javmor79. Always a pleasure to see you post another story here. *****

5 starrs

This has gone on too long. How long before we see a finish.. so what happens to the baby as he goes to jail. A beating like this requires punishment and we do not what damaged he did. And two cheaters with life problems should move on. She wants nothing to do with his son . As she continues with her own demons. SO finish the dame story. Thank you

He did very well with the scum, sounded like a good sound thrashing!

So why:

A/ Let her bail him? He could have done it himself!

B/ Why get in a car with her?

He was winning and flushed it all away!

In this series the characters construction and crafting are wonderful but for me, as woman Gina is a paranoiac bitch. Living with her is just like living with a poisonous serpent. Lee made a huge mistake but she planned a devious vengeance. Blind love is suicide. I would never stay with a partner with her personality. She must learn and use this knowledge in her next relationship. The trust is dead. Brian was just the available pawn, could be anyone.

Don't let Javmor put them back together.

I see two kind of comments. The ones who praise your story as the best you wrote (it's not! For me is Man on the cave), and the ones who say that this story is too long, repetitive, soap opera like with very immature characters. I'm afraid I go with the second ones. The writing is great as usual, but this is no suprise because we know you have the skills. Plotwise however you drag the resolution of the story as a soap opera without adding any information- To me it's turning boring watching the characters make the sane mistakes over and over again, like immature teenagers instead of responsible adults. Having sex with his wife? Really? After what he saw in the parking lot? Is there an once of trust in him to go to bed with her? Very dissapointing to be honest.

I said it before, I dont care what happens to any of your characters, they're both equally idiotic to me. Maybe you should put them together just to prevent them ruinning other people's lives. Please put them out of theiir rmisery in the next (and hopefully last) chapter.

This story still holds all of the tension and emotion and it is portrayed incredibly well. I can honestly see it is not easy to write. While I’d like to see it more often I fully get how life gets in the way. finding time to put this much energy into words can be tough

is that you are really lacking inspiration. I had to go back to check i was not reading again some previous chapter. It was time to wrap up things and you are still making things worst and going round in circles. Your worst story so far.

Found chapter 5 about 2 weeks ago. But didn’t read it then. I assumed it would be the end of the story.I wanted to savor it. I really liked the prior chapters.

So I delayed reading this until today. Cold wet and windy outside. Fire blazing in the woodstove. A perfect time to enjoy this continuation.

And enjoy it I did. I love the ass kicking he gave the prick Brian. Definitely worth 3 days in jail.

No idea where this will end but I can't wait to read the last chapter.

A lot to like. The author does not shy from difficulty, but embraces it. The characters are both flawed and troubled, yet good and decent. The story follows a logical arc, but not easily--stuff gets in the way; just as it does for most of us!

Really?

Great writing. I wish there was more.

it wasn't so much a glass jaw as it was a glass back of the head. 4.5 speed? Impressive.

Your writing skills and understanding of the human condition are a class above most here, even some of the better writers. Keep up the good work.

Unlike most LW stories, this one has two highly flawed people at its core...just like real life.

READING FOR THE SECOND TIME,GREAT STORY EQUAL TO ANY OF YOUR OTHERS, CANT UNDERSTAND WHY SOME PEOPLE GET SO ANNOYED BY A FEW MISPELLID WORDS, JUST 5⭐️.

It isn't just misspelled words it's what they cause, an interruption in the flow of the story. It's the misspelled word or when the author paints the scene of the party's standing in a parking lot and arguing and Brian said to her "No matter what you do or who you crush while doing it, you're the victim! It's a wonder your husband hasn't left you sooner!" "His words caused her to ache. She felt she was getting physically attacked. She had no comeback for him, no response. All she could do was [sit] there and feel the impact of each syllable". From part 4 page 3.

When did she sit down, did they put a chair in the parking lot for her, was there a park near by that had benches to sit on? I know it's only one word instead of sit it should be stand but it breaks the flow of the story. It's small it's petty but it's one of those things that take away just a little from a great story. Drop the S from she and it makes a gender change to a he. Small I grant you, but again it breaks the flow of the story. And there are times that a word is left from a sentence that has been edited and you know that the author just forgot to eras it. But it breaks the flow. Small things can add up and reduce the story from 5 stars to 4 stars. Wish it weren't so but you can't vote 4.5 stars or 4.75 stars.

@JustOneMansOpinion,

If you are going to be petty when giving public feedback to an author who puts forth the effort to post truly well written stories on a free website, it probably would be best not to embarrass yourself by making far more severe errors within your comment. Unfortunately, your understanding of the purpose and proper use of punctuation in the written English language is poor. I count at least four run-on sentences, as well as at least one sentence fragment, in your comment.

Sadly, your writing exhibits additional problems. Please allow me to draw your attention to two:

First, you use the word "party's" (possessive) when the correct form of that noun in your sentence would be "parties" (plural).

Second, you use the noun "eras" (multiple time periods of special significance) when your sentence calls for the use of the verb "erase" (to remove or abrade away).

It is all too easy to forget that glass houses are so terribly fragile. Perhaps we should all seek to live in a world without stones.

I really liked the fact that he kicked that asshole ass to the hospital. Yea he's a man and no wimp

Good story, but serious plot error - Brian accepted their breakup in the last chapter. What happened here ignored that.

Regina is still a vile whore who intentionally, unlike her husband, set out to devastate him for a whole goddamned weekend with a fucking coworker who just added her as another notch.

I really don't like her. It's hard to when she makes you want to puke

Will you pull the rug gout from under these two? The odds are good.

Never, ever, use the term, his lips curled up; his mouth curled up. Those terms destroy all further interest in reading your dreck.

Oh, and, "a tear slipped down his cheek", what a wimpy description after a fight!

I’m reading what I feel is the most complete story told by an excellent wordsmith that I’ve ever read on this site. I see no flaws that gave me pause. I’m reading this series after it’s been completed so my perspective is fresh and amazed at the quality of the story and the characters. Thank you for sharing this talent.

6/5 2 thumbs up... off to PT. 06

This story is playing out like a Cagivagurl story! Wash, rinse, repeat. Wash, rinse, repeat