There Must Be a Mistake Ch. 09

"Delicious if you don't stop, I'm going to take you upstairs and teach you another lesson."

"Is this the good lesson or the bad lesson?"

"Do you really need me to answer that for you?"

"No, I think I'll stop."

"Excellent choice, sit on my lap and listen to the rest of your father's lecture."

"What happens if something pops up?"

"We will deal with it later, much later."

"Are we finished children, if so I do not have much more to go through."

Delicious settled her ass comfortably on Grey's lap, and received a nibble on her ear and a kiss on her neck in return.

Jennifer passed behind him, carrying a carafe of coffee, and smacked him on his head.

"Pay attention Dr. Thyme, but not to her; would you like more coffee?"

"No thank you, I'm good."

"From the sounds coming out of your bedroom, I would say you're a very good."

"Jennifer, stop that, it's embarrassing."

"No it's not Delicious. It's called sex; and it's wonderful isn't it dear?"

"I would bet my life on it, not my wife, my life."

"Would your father have uttered those words six weeks ago Delicious?"

"I don't think my father knew about sex six weeks ago, but you have taught him a lot very quickly."

"I got my PhD in sex very early in life. I found the love of my life little bit later."

"Here we go getting sappy again. Can we finish this little discussion and maybe Gray and I can go straighten up our room."

"Is that what they are calling it these days: Straightening up your room? When I was younger we used to call it, 'Getting something straight between us.' However, if it works for you it's fine with me."

"Jennifer, you are incorrigible."

"Yes I am, isn't it wonderful?"

"If you two don't mind, let me finish, and this sexual bantering can go on for the rest of the day, while I go to work downstairs."

"Go ahead Even; at least I will be listening to you."

"Thank you Gray, now where was I. When we go into stasis, whether we are at .9 or .999 of light speed it doesn't matter. When we get there, we get there. The computers will wake Gordon up first, and he will check our position. Once he verifies everything is okay, he will wake up the rest of us. He will probably have a party with Danielle and Brandy first, but he'll get us up soon enough."

"Dad that was awful."

Gordon came running into the room carrying a fistful of his money. "I heard you talking dad. How much money do I need to have a party with Danielle and Brandy?"

I looked at Jennifer and shook my head. "When we go out today let's see if we can find a stapler big enough to keep my mouth shut when he's around."

"Why do you need a stapler dad?"

"Sometimes son I say inappropriate things when I'm not thinking. It's not a good thing to do with a young man running around the house."

"Can I still invite them for the party?"

"We are busy this weekend, but if you give mommy their phone numbers, I'm sure we can set up a party for the following weekend for Danielle, Brandy, Rod's children, and a few of their friends. Maybe we will even invite you to your Birthday Party."

"Thanks dad, I think I'll invite you too." With that, my son disappeared in the flash.

I yelled, "We're leaving in five minutes."

His head popped out of the playroom door and I knew I was in trouble. "Is that a man's five minutes, or woman's five minutes dad?"

Gray tapped me on the shoulder and laughed as he walked away with Delicious.

"Do you remember what I told you about the rules Gordon? You are never supposed to talk about them when the women are around."

"Oh yeah dad, I forgot that part. I'm sorry. Forget I said anything."

Before I could say a word, a towel hit me in the head. "You are filling my sons head up with garbage."

I walked over to my wife, with the towel hanging over my head and asked her a question. "I can walk out the door in less than five minutes. Can you? You told me you wanted to leave the house by 10:30 AM. The time now is 10:25 AM what do you think?"

"I think you're not getting laid tonight."

"I think you are going to miss it more than I am."

"That's not fair Even, I waited a long time for you."

"I waited longer for you. I waited a lifetime for you and it was worth it. Do you want to crawl into a closet with me for a minute?"

"Guess who would open the door."

"Do you want to take a shower?"

"I could use one."

"Do you need anyone to wash your back?"

"I have an itch on my back that I have not been able to scratch."

"I have been known to be a very good itch scratcher."

"We need a babysitter."

I know exactly where to get one."

I yelled, "Delicious could you come down here for a moment."

I waited a moment and called again. "Delicious could you come down here for a moment."

Jennifer was doing everything except undressing next to me, when I finally yelled, "Delicious come down here."

I heard her door open and she screamed, "DAD WE'RE BUSY!"

"I thought you were straightening out your room?"

"We are, sort of."

Jennifer said, "Now I really need a shower, a really cold shower. I'm going to kill you very slowly. You did this to me. You better make it up to me tonight."

To paraphrase the saying: The best laid plans... The only problem was neither my wife nor I was getting laid. Come to think of it, neither was my daughter, nor Gray. All four of us struck out. This turned out to be one hell of a morning.

"Gordon, I am going downstairs to do some work on Sequoia. Do you..."

My son was at my side before the last vowel of Sequoia was out my mouth.

He sat in the number one position which was now permanently his. The chair was set at his height, and I no longer told him what to do during his time on the machine. As far as he was concerned it was playtime. I just made sure everything he put into the machine was saved so Gray and I could decipher it later. Geniuses came in all sizes and shapes. This one was my son. I had to remind Rod to make that soon, and permanent.

******

We did go shopping that day, but we didn't leave until after lunch, and didn't get back until after dinner. Unlike my daughter, when we went furniture-shopping Gordon did not touch anything, he surveyed. He walked down the aisle casually, without stopping, and said, "No. No. No. We will take this one mom."

Jennifer was horrified. "How can you say that Gordon; you didn't open a drawer, you didn't sit on the bed. You didn't do anything."

"I like the style of the furniture and the color mommy. You are going to buy me a different mattress. Why would I want to sit on that mattress? Can I have this bedroom set please?"

I didn't say a word. I'm not sure I breathe. Gordon was looking straight at his mother and I was not going to let her out of this one by butting in.

"Are you sure honey?"

"Gordon let his shoulders slip down, and sighed, "Alright mom, if you're not happy with this one, you can pick one out for me. I don't want to see you to cry."

I could feel it in my bones. She was waiting for me to say something, anything to help her along. I wasn't going to do it. This one was for her. Big black eyes, staring up into bigger black eyes. Mommy's heart finally melted.

"You can have it Gordon."

Our son did a victory dance in the area his furniture was in. Now he opened the drawer's and tested the headboard and slid under the bed. Now he felt entitled to do the things a young boy would do with something he owned.

Meanwhile, his mother stood in the aisle being consoled by his father. She had given her son away to the Military for the next 20 years. Her four-year-old child had picked out his own bedroom set. How could any mother allow that to happen?

That was only the beginning of our afternoon. We picked up his suits and he looked wonderful in them. The owner brought in some extra slacks and shirts for him just in case we wanted more.

Jennifer said he didn't need any more dress clothes.

I thanked the owner and told him to box everything up that he purchased for us.

Jennifer turned a beautiful color rose before we left the store.

I could only guess what her blood pressure was. I had a feeling that I was in deep shit.

We went to another young man's store to buy casual clothes for him. Jennifer started looking in one area, while Gordon and I looked in another. Gordon could not believe the first shirt she put against his chest.

He said mournfully, "Mom, don't do it please."

"Honey it's a gorgeous shirt."

"Mom, please don't."

"Oh God, I forgot, its plaid, I'll put it back."

It turned out that my wife had a fetish for stripes and plaids for her son. Many of her clothes had stripes on them, which made her look taller. However, when it came to her son, her hands automatically went towards those styles. It reached the point that Gordon hid every time he saw his mother was an armload of clothes.

Unfortunately, for him, she knew where all his hiding places were. I could not see him. He was not visible on the floor underneath it, and his hands were not holding on to the top. If I didn't know where he was I could never have found him.

Jennifer handed me the heap of clothes she was carrying, and walked directly to the round he was hiding in. She looked down through the center of it.

"Young man when was the last time you were able to hide from me in a store?"

"I was two and half mommy."

"Does September 30 mean anything to you?"

"Yes mommy, it's my birthday. I become five years old."

"Would you like to live that long?"

"Yes mommy, I'll come out."

He crawled out from underneath the slacks, and looked up at his mother.

"How much trouble am I in mommy?"

"I will let you know after you finish trying on the clothes I gave to your father."

He looked at the armload of clothes I was holding and thought he would be here until the store closed.

I said to him, "Come on son let's try these clothes on."

Jennifer said, "I do that with him."

"I have to learn how to do it, don't I?"

I didn't know if she realized I was up to something or not, but she said, "Okay, go ahead."

We took the largest dressing room they had, and I separated the clothes by type, and maker. If she had five shirts from the same company, I held them up to make sure they were all the same size. I never believe the tags that are inside them. I did the same thing with the Jeans, corduroys, and everything else she gave me. When I was finished, I tried one of each item on Gordon. If one fit, they all fit. If one did not fit, they all did not fit. It took us all of 10 minutes to go through 35 items.

"I like your way of trying on clothes dad. It's much easier then mommy's way."

"It's another rule that you are not allowed to tell a woman about Gordon. If they find out we are all in trouble."

"How many rules are there dad?"

"There is not an exact number Gordon. Women keep changing the ground rules on us. Every time they change the rules we have to compensate for them by making new rules for them. It's a never ending battle between the sexes."

"Is it always a problem, or is it fun too?"

"Sometimes it's an awful lot of fun Gordon, more fun than you can possibly imagine at your age."

"I will be five soon, will I understand then?"

"No, you will have to be much older before you understand."

"Are you going to get me my cell phone?"

"I am going to give it to you before we leave the mall."

"That's cool dad, thank you."

I had Jennifer and Gordon go into the Chinese restaurant ahead of me to order dinner. I stopped at a kiosk and picked up Gordon's cell phone. It was the tiniest thing I had ever seen, but it was perfect for a four-year-old with tiny fingers. It measured 3" x 3". It could make and receive calls and text messages. It was a cute little phone. It was also expensive. I bought it for him anyhow, and had it set up with my cell phone carrier. By the time I entered the restaurant my food was on the table, getting cold, but that didn't matter when I saw the light in my son's eyes explode with delight, when I showed him HIS cell phone

"Wow dad, it looks like a spy telephone."

I humored my son by telling him it was a spy telephone, and it was the newest thing on the market. He was thrilled.

Jennifer said to me, "You do know I am not going to have any control over my son if you keep doing this."

I said to her that it would never happen.

"Look at me Gordon. All these wonderful things I buy for you is because I love you, and you are a wonderful boy. There is only one thing you have to do for me in return. You must continue to love and respect your mother as you do today. I love your mother very much. I will not allow you or anyone else to hurt her. If you want me to continue to buy you all these wonderful things, all you have to do for me is this one big thing. I don't think it will be very hard for you to do, because you already love your mother."

"I will always love my mommy dad. She was there when I was born."

"Yes Gordon I know. You were there also."

"I was going to say that."

"You already said that several times before. Now hug your mother before she starts crying."

He kissed and hugged his mother, and then he asked me, "Why do women always cry?"

"It's the way God made them. When they are very happy, or very sad, they cry. Right now I think your mother is very happy."

"Why is she happier now than she was this afternoon?"

"Your mother knows after we finish eating, and you stop questioning me about everything, and anything under the sun, we can go home."

"Can I make a phone call when we are in the car?"

"This was your last question, and this is my final answer. Yes you can."

"Thanks dad."

*******

Gordon sat in his safety seat, talking on his new cell phone with Brandy. The woman in the passenger seat was not happy with me. She looked at the amount of clothing in the rear of the Q7, and every time she turned a page in her magazine I thought she was going to rip it out of its binding.

"Was that my arm or my leg you were tearing out?"

"If I was your daughter I would say I am not talking to you. However, I am your wife, and I can do much worse than that."

"I will make it up to you by being extremely inventive tonight while we are in bed. I will ask you to forgive me my transgressions; all you have to do is tell me what they were."

"You are taking my little boy away from me. I have never had a man in my life, and he has never had a man in his. He has latched on to you as he would to his biological father from the day he was born. I can't say I'm not happy about it, because I always wanted you two to get along. I just never thought it would happen this fast."

"What would you like me to do? If I turn my affection for him off, he will think he did something wrong. I don't want you to be hurt. I don't want Gordon to be hurt. I don't care about me, I will survive, but you are my life, and he is my son. What do you want me to do?"

"Is there any way I can get involved in the spaceship project?"

"We have already decided that you were going to drive it."

"How do you drive a spaceship?"

"Very carefully."

"That's not funny Even."

"How else would you describe flying something off the ground that weighs 6,000,000 pounds, at 100 miles an hour, and two minutes later is flying at 16,000 miles an hour?"

"Hair-raising, mind-boggling, death-defying, are those good enough for you?"

"I can think of a few more, but those will do just fine. The computer will do most of the flying, but you will be the pilot in command. From now on when we go downstairs, you come with us; no more girly shopping."

"That's not fair Even. A woman has a right to shop. It's written in the Constitution. It's in the First Amendment. "Life, Liberty, and the Pursuit of Happiness. If I can't shop I can't be happy."

"I will work to see if I can give you a few hours off on Saturday mornings."

"You had better see I get all day Saturday off."

"I'll think about it."

She reached down, retrieved her magazine, and began reading.

Jennifer's flowing skirt had risen slightly above her knee so I decided to tease her.

I slipped my hand under the skirts' fabric, made a very quick move to her pussy, and began rubbing my fingers into her slot.

She held my wrist in a death grip, and her panties became wet instantly. She said to me, "If you don't finish me I will cut off this hand."

"Babe we have company in the back seat."

"I don't give a fuck. You started this, make me cum."

"Is this a bad time to remind you that you owe the cookie jar $10?"

"Is this a bad time to say if you don't complete what you started you are going to need an oral surgeon?"

"Open your window a few inches; we need a little noise in the car."

"Do you always think of everything?"

"No, but he (Gordon) does."

I slipped my fingers behind the flimsy fabric of her panties, and touched the smooth clean flesh surrounding her vagina. I let my thumb slide down the center, and played over the hooded warrior, until the nerve center popped out from underneath it. It is such fun to play with so many reactive nerves at one time, and watch your partner become disabled at the same moment. There is no other section of the female body that has the same control over it then the tiny clitoris. I centered my play on this tiny piece of flesh. My wife's hips started fighting her safety belt, trying to get my finger to touch her harder, and in another area to satisfy her. She was grunting in annoyance with me.

My eyes stayed on the road instead of on her. I was using the braille method of sexual stimulation, and while you are driving it is the best way to stay alive.

I took a quick look at Jen and she had lost 4 inches in height. She would have lost a lot more, but that was all her safety belt would allow her to go. Her knees were spread as wide as the car would permit her, and her skirt was up around her waist. Thankfully, Gordon's seat was behind her, and not behind me.

My wife said to me, "Faster dammit."

Who was I to argue with a beautiful woman, my wife, my love, my life?

Her hips arched as high off the seat as she could. She was sweating profusely. She was right there when it happened. Another few seconds and it would have been over.

"How do you turn this phone off dad?"

My wife grabbed my wrist so I would not leave her in dire need. I also had to answer my sons question without any undue delay.

I said to Gordon and a slightly louder voice than normal, "Hit the red button that says End."

"Oh, thanks dad, I see it."

As I said this, I shoved three fingers into my wife's vagina. I was rewarded with a handful of fluids, and a moan that lasted forever.

She collapsed her thighs against my hand and said, with a sheepish grin, "Thanks dad."

I rewarded her by continuing to move my fingers in and out of her vagina until her hips started moving again.

"No, not again, he will hear me this time."

I held the steering wheel with my knees, and opened my window. The roar of the traffic passing us drowned out our conversation. I pumped and pumped my fingers into her and her hips responded as best they could. I moved my thumb into position above her clit and began pressing down on it.

"Fuck," was the only word she said as she approached her second climax. I felt her abs tighten, her legs stiffen, and her left hand was getting ready to shatter my Ulna.

She brought her right hand to her mouth and bit it as she screamed in ecstasy. Her body became part at the seams as she rested against back of the seat without saying another word.

When we arrived home I let Gordon out of the car. He ran to the front door and Gray let him in. He came out to help me with my packages, and saw Jennifer sleeping.