There Must Be a Mistake Ch. 09

He looked at me warily.

"It's been a long tough day Gray. Wait until you have children and have them try on clothes for three hours. You would be unconscious also."

"It must've been torture."

"The medieval kind of torture. I was thinking about putting needles into my eyes to make the pain go away."

"That might have hurt a little."

"How did my daughter do today?"

"She had a smile on most of the day."

"Good work Gray, keep it up. She will become a human being soon enough."

"Did Jennifer have a good day?"

"No woman enjoys giving up control of the purchases that are being made. She allowed Gordon to pick out his own bedroom set. I thought she was going to collapse on the showroom floor after she said okay. Then we picked up his suits and other items at the specialty store, before we started our main shopping. That's where she showed her skill. I've never seen anything like it in my life. It has to be in the human genome structure that women are born to shop. Women are walking around the store carrying 200 pounds of clothes in their arms, wheeling a stroller, and have three other children walking with them. To them it's like an everyday occurrence, to me I would rather be run over by a concrete truck. Gordon tried to hide as his mother approached with an armload of clothes. She threw them to me and went straight to him. I'm telling you Gray, it's genetic. There is no other way to explain it."

"Are you two finished yapping back there? A woman can't even take a nap after a hard day shopping when two men get together, and don't remember to whisper."

"I'm sorry Jen; I just came outside to help you and Even bring in some packages. I'll be quieter for the next trip, and the next trip, and the next trip."

"You're not being funny Gray. I have barely scratched the surface for my son's wardrobe. Would you like to come with me tomorrow?"

"I'll check my schedule, but I'm almost sure I'm busy for the next 10 years possibly longer. I love shopping, but work must come first."

"You have to come up with a better lie then that one. Delicious will tear you apart otherwise."

As Gray walked away with some packages he said, "You have to give me some time; all this is new to me also."

Jennifer got out of the car and started walking towards me. She had a look on her face I couldn't quite read, but flashing back to my conversation with Gray I thought I was in trouble. Suddenly, she launched herself at me, with such power; she knocked me to the ground. She began kissing me everywhere she could reach, and started unbuttoning my shirt so she could get to more.

I did not remain idle during her attack. My hands were roaming all over her glorious body. I had every inch memorized, but memorization has no feeling. Touching her is heavenly. Many times Rod asked me what I was waiting for. Jennifer was it. Jennifer was who I was waiting for. She was everything I could have ever asked for in a woman, in a mother, and in a wife. I was fortunate to blunder into her, while I was running away from another woman in my life that I loved.

I grew tired of being attacked, so I flipped Jennifer onto her back and attacked her. I'm not sure how long we were at it, but I had her left nipple in my mouth, and my hand on her pussy, when my daughter said, "Couldn't you two wait until you got into your bedroom? This open display of sexuality with impressionable underage children around could be detrimental to their successful introduction to society. They may think all adults are animals."

Jennifer looked up at my daughter and growled. "Missy you are in deep shit. I was right there. No one steals an orgasm from me. You had better pray your father finds that one in a hurry. If I don't cum, I am coming after you, and you are not going to be happy with me when I catch you."

She was gone in a flash. She was here, and then she wasn't.

"Babe, I think you made my daughter pee in her pants. I've never seen her move that quickly."

"She's lucky I came before she got here. I would really have been upset otherwise. Would you help me up please; there is a stone under my ass and it's hurting me."

"I'll bend you over the hood of the car, kiss it, and make it better. Then I'll do a lot of other things while you are bent over it."

"I don't think so. Gray has been here. Delicious has been here. Guess who will be here next?"

"I guess we'll take the packages into the house, and get things straight between us later."

"That is okay with me, or we could straighten up our room."

"That works for me. Either way, we are going to need a shower afterwards. I love showers."

"Me too, and if you're good, I'll let you scratch my back."

Wednesday

After dinner, I tapped my glass, and my bride turned towards me to get a kiss. I looked towards her and realized what I had done, so I kissed her quickly.

I said to everyone, "I did not tap my glass to get a kiss from my bride, although it was wonderful, as always. However, it has been one full week, and my son has not said one bad word. He wins the contents of the 'COOKIE JAR!'."

Everyone at the table stood up and applauded, including Gordon. The first thing he did was take the $100 bills from under the cookie jar and hand them to his mother. "Buy something nice for yourself mommy."

The water works started instantly, and Jen ran out of the room.

"What did I do wrong now dad?"

"Absolutely nothing, what you did was positively perfect."

"Why is mom crying?"

"She's crying because she loves you, and you just showed her you love her very much."

"Dad, it was only money."

"Yes but it was your money and you gave it to your mother. It was a gift from your heart. I think you should go to your mother. I think she needs a hug."

"Even that boy is going to be a lady killer. I've never seen a child his age do everything so right."

"Maybe you should take notes Gray."

"I'm waiting to see the contract before I make any comments to you madam."

"How many times do I have to tell you I am a miss, not a madam?"

"Sometimes, I really wonder, not about your sexual status, but what is between your ears. You are brilliant. However somewhere deep inside your gray matter, I believe Rod is correct. There is evil deep inside you, and I have the scratches to prove it. If I had not taken the self-defense courses, when I was younger, you would be scraping me up off the floor, with pleasure written all over your face. You would be the Dominant personality, and you would expect me to be the Submissive. Well, MISSY, it's not going to happen. We will either be equals or you and I are going to need a referee. Jennifer looks like a good one to me."

"Oh no, not Jennifer, she is too logical. I can't get anywhere with her."

"I know that is exactly why she would be perfect as a mediator: Logic over Lying."

Jennifer asked, "How much do mediators make per hour Even?"

"I don't know dear, but at the rate these two are going, whatever it is and the amount of hours you are going to be working you will not need your inheritance. You are going to be rich beyond your wildest imagination."

"Thanks dad, I needed to hear that right now."

"I'm only too glad to help dear. I just raised your salary to $150 an hour. Jennifer is only going to charge you $300 an hour. Gray, because you are now family, we are going to give you a discount. Jen is only going to charge you $10 an hour."

"Why am I being charged $300 an hour, and Gray only $10 an hour?"

"It's only logical to charge the belligerent patient more than the calm patient."

"I hate you with every fiber of my being. I am not talking to you for the rest of today and tomorrow; possibly the next day also. I'll think about it. This session is over."

Gordon walked back into the room pulling Jennifer with him. "Mommy's feeling better now. She stopped crying."

"How did you manage that Gordon?"

"I hugged her and kissed her, and told her everything would be all right tomorrow when the Sun is up. She believed me."

"What happens if it's cloudy, or raining?"

"Dad, you should know better than that. The sun is always up in the daytime; sometimes we can't see because of the clouds and rain, but it's always there."

There is nothing in this world like being a world-renowned scientist, and being taken down a few pegs by a four-year-old boy. I dropped my head, and hit it against the table with a resounding bang.

Everyone was bent over laughing, including me. I don't believe I ever laughed that hard, and that long in my life. Later that evening I sent an email to Shelby and Robert Meil telling them what happened at dinner. I knew they would be laughing with me also.

The next order of business was to count the money that was in the pretzel jar. Gordon wanted to do that himself; but all the money was crinkled. We decided to divide and conquer. We dumped the money on the table; put it in stacks of 10s, 20s, 50s, and 100s. We straightened them, and placed them in front of Gordon. There was 11 weeks of improper language money in there and Gordon was going to be rich by the time he finished counting. His eyes kept getting bigger and bigger as he finished each pile.

"Where did all this money come from dad?"

Delicious said, "There is four weeks of my salary is in there Gordon."

"Do you want it back; I don't need all this money?"

"How much is in there Gordon?"

"$9310."

Jennifer asked, "Gordon may I have my $30 back?"

"Sure mom, do you want three 10 dollar bills or one 10 dollar bill and one 20 dollar bill?"

Jennifer replied, "I think I'll take you instead." She grabbed him and hugged him, until he squealed with laughter."

"Dad if I give you the money could you get me a subscription to Bloomberg's report?"

"We can do that online son."

"Can I start now?"

"Gray would you tell the person I'm not talking to, and who is not talking to me, to help Jennifer with the kitchen."

"Gray would you tell the person I'm not talking to that I will be glad to help Jennifer with the kitchen."

"Oh, luckiest person in this room, the person who is not talking to you and you are not talking to has granted your request. I am going to go with you and Gordon to take lessons on how to beat the stock market."

Delicious smacked him on the back of his head and punched him in his ribs.

Gray didn't bother to turn around.

Everyone stood up from the table and began moving towards their destination, except Gray. He made a 270° turn and smacked Delicious violently on her ass.

She couldn't do anything but scream in pain. Her feet were dancing on the floor, while her hands were holding her right cheek. Gray was standing right behind her waiting for her to start calming down.

When she did, he took her right arm, and bent it towards her shoulder blade. He walked her towards the front door, and yelled at her.

"How many times do I have to tell you to behave yourself? If you are not going to behave, I'm going to take you over my knee, drop your pants, and spank you until you are red. Do you understand me Delicious?"

She had tears in her eyes, from the pain, when she said, "I believe we've come to a meeting of the minds Gray."

"Is that where your mind is? If I had known that I would've talked to that area before."

"Gray a little levity right now is not called for. My ass hurts like hell, and a little TLC couldn't hurt. You can go downstairs and learn about the stock market, or you can come upstairs and put some cream on my ass. Which do you think is going to be the better choice?"

"I'll meet you upstairs as soon as you finish the kitchen."

"That was a very, very good choice on your part. Any other choice would have resulted in bloodshed."

"There was only one other choice."

"I am aware of that, I am also aware of where the steak knives are."

"I will see you shortly, don't start without me."

"I wouldn't have to start if it wasn't for you."

"Yes, but look at the benefits you will receive now."

"I'm still in pain, you will benefit not me."

"I'll kiss it and make it better."

"It's beginning to sound more interesting by the minute."

"I could accidentally miss my target."

"Would it help if I had a pillow under my stomach?"

"Oh yes, I could use my hands and my lips at the same time. You know me, I love to multitask."

"Yes multitask, I like that word. I'll finish the kitchen."

******

"You finished the kitchen by yourself Jennifer?"

"What was I supposed to do while you two were canoodling by the front door; sit on my hands? You two have to talk to each other more often, and not just after fighting. If you don't, you will start picking fights just to talk. That is not a good precedent to start."

"We talk all the time."

"You talk about work all the time. You talk about computers, you talk about space you talk about this project or that project; but you have to talk about each other. Even and I have only known each other for a very short time. I'll bet we know more about each other than most couples do. How many young women tell their husbands about their past sexual exploits? How many young women tell their husbands about their families, not only the good parts but the bad parts? What would a young woman do, when she's just about to get married finds out that her husband committed incest with his sister, and they had a child that lives with him? What would the young woman normally do?"

"She would smack him, and run back to her family."

"You are correct. She would not give him the opportunity to explain what happened.

Your father's case is totally out of the ordinary. For 16 years he never knew you were his child. What's worse is you never knew you had a father, who would have loved you, like Even Luck would have loved you. Close your eyes, and look back at your life. Picture it without Julius Mark in it. Think of Even and Divine Luck as your parents for those 16 years. What kind of person would you be right now? How happy would you be? That is the person you have to be. That is the person your mother wants you to be. As much as she defended you from your rotten father and the malicious kids at your school that is the person she wants you to be. Be that person Delicious; BE THAT PERSON."

Jennifer folded Delicious into her arms as she sobbed. "Where the hell did my father find you?"

"We were on an airplane on our way to Fairbanks. Gordon picked a conversation with him that lasted almost 4 hours. I was thoroughly impressed with him. If Gordon had fallen asleep I would've screwed your father on the plane. It would have hurt like hell, but he was the sexiest man I had ever known."

"My dad is sexy?"

"Your dad has the sexiest mind in the world. That weapon of his also comes in handy."

"Let's not talk about his weapon again please."

"I may be able to take the whole thing after I have a baby."

"Jennifer no more please."

"Are you jealous?"

"No, but I made a promise like dad did with you. I'm waiting until my wedding night, and you talking like that is not helping me."

"There is only one thing that separates the good girls from the bad girls."

"Why do I have the feeling I'm not going to like this answer. Go ahead what separates the good girls from the bad girls?"

"The bad girls go to prison."

"Jennifer that was horrible. No it was worse than horrible, it was disgusting."

"You couldn't be more wrong if you tried. Disgusting is giving a blow job right after you have anal sex."

"Oh yuck, that is disgusting."

"You're right those little brown things on his dick are not cornflakes."

"Jennifer you are awful. We did you hear these things?"

"That's what I learned when I went to college. For the few months I was there I learned dirty jokes, filthy jokes, and gruesome jokes. I missed most of my classes because I was busy getting laid and I wound up pregnant with Gordon. That was the happiest accident in my life."

"If there is a perfect little boy in this world, it is your son. I love him, I really do."

Gray asked, "Why aren't you in bed with your ass in the air?"

"My master calls. I was receiving counseling from my aging mother-in-law."

"What is it with this aging shit miss. "

Delicious walked to the table, picked up the empty pretzel jar, and handed it to Jennifer.

"Congratulations that will be the first $10 of this new round please."

Delicious walked out of the kitchen, took Gray by the hand, and started walking up the stairs.

Jennifer yelled, "I'm not talking to you anymore. I don't like you. I have never liked you, and furthermore I don't like your hair either. You should cut it all off and start again. I will do it for you myself while you're sleeping."

Delicious yelled back, "You're just jealous because you have black hair."

"I don't run around the house naked."

"That's a low blow Jennifer."

"Did you say you blew him while you were naked?"

"Four times, and he never got soft."

Gray said, "Really, where was I?"

"Shut up Gray."

"Good night children, have fun."

*********

Late Thursday Evening

"Where the hell do you think you're going?"

"I couldn't sleep so I thought I would go for walk."

"Gray my eyes aren't open and I can tell you're lying to me. Would you like to try that again, before I get out of bed and scratch your eyes out?"

"I'm going to play high-stakes poker game with the boys."

"This is your last chance; the next time I see that thing of yours I'm going to bite it off."

"That is downright mean. I haven't used it on you yet, and you are going to bite off. That doesn't seem fair."

"If you keep lying to me, you will never use it on me. It will be in the contract."

"I will go back to work for NASA."

"It's been nice knowing you."

"Do you know how much I hate you?"

"Yes, a little bit more or less than I hate you."

"Bitch."

"Watch your language Gray, someone told me I had to watch mine."

He pulled down the covers, and sat on the bed beside her. His left hand moved between her thighs, and his mouth descended on her nipple. He played with her for several minutes and felt her respond.

She moaned, and licked his ear. "Now, where did you say you are going?"

"Doesn't anything distract you?"

"Yes, science, math, physics, analytical geometry..."

"Enough, I've heard enough. You are a bitch. You are as wet as can be, and you can still joke with me."

"You have no idea how close I am to cuming; but before I let you finish me, you are going to tell me where you going and what you're going to do while you're there. If you don't, I am going to turn over and go back to sleep. When you come back to bed your side will be filled with ice, and my side will be colder than that."

"This is top, top secret; you cannot tell Gordon, because it may accidentally slip out of his mouth."

"I understand, go ahead."

"I'm going downstairs to make chocolate pudding."

"You're dead man."

"I told you I didn't want it falling out Gordon's mouth."

"Goodbye Gray, I would check your bed when you come home. Whoever she is I hope she's worth it."

"I would never do that to you. I will never cheat on you. Well, maybe if they give me a chance to fly the F-35 that would be close but..."

"Leave, get out of our room, I'm finished talking with you, I'm going back to sleep. If you can't tell me the truth it means you don't trust me. If you don't trust me it means we are not meant to be together. I won't bother writing up a contract, I'll move back into my room in the morning."

"You said ANYTHING."

"That was before you started lying to me."

"I have not lied to you yet."

"Yes you have; we have no chocolate pudding in the house, which means you can't make it. You lied to me. You can leave, and do what you want to do."