All Comments on 'To Love a Were Ch. 09'

im afraid I wont be reading anymore... you killed it, raped it, molested it, fucked in in the ass... first alaron goes away, now hes back, then shes trusting of him after hes fucked her life up not once, but twice (wait now 3 times)... add to that, at the end of the last few she was starting to open up to Eian, now shes gone back -1000% of what she was before... you have lost your touch badly... only 5/9 of these CH's have i given 5/5 for vote, the rest got 1-4 depending on my feelings at the end...

sorry, this chapter was such a shame to read... v1/5, I might read the next chapter in hope for redemption, but you have dug yourself so far into a "hole", to me at least, that its going to take nuclear powered jetpack to get out...

please dont let fiona and eian be split apart! come on, dont let him walk away from her!!!

with anon on this chapter when they said.....and I quote

"im afraid I wont be reading anymore... you killed it"

I hope you can fix it I will read the next but I am not hopeful that you will save the story that I was really enjoying.

have faith that you can save this story

Alright, this chapter could've been better, but to save it you should have Alaron be killed. For his actions that he has done or make him go away and make fiona realize that he was sick and twisted and hate him. You can pull it off just have faith ignore the other comments. After he wakes up u should have Fiona crying on his chest and saying her apologies. You should make her have the faith that she had in him when she was a child but far greater. This story has it's ups and downs, but others are to harsh this story has much potential. Have faith and believe ^.^ IxRoyalReaperxI

Please don't let Eian and Fiona split apart I wa enjoying reading about there romantic affair. Please save this story now.

My overall feeling is that you are trying to do too much in one story or maybe at one time in the story. I feel like if you did less and developed the story threads you use it would be easier to follow. By this I mean, it was already a bit confusing about what it meant for her to be awakened. But as that develops and she deals with becoming an adult overnight without the experience to back up that chronological age, you now add in her being awakened again because of this pill (at least I gather the pill did it to her or her reaction to the pill or whatever). So, now we see she has these scary abilities that should take 100 yrs to develop and she has them now. In addition, we are told that the pill may affect her b/c of her human side and may be killing her but they don't really know.

AT THE SAME TIME, with this relationship with Eian (which was a bit strange for me to begin with b/c of the age change but I accepted b/c of the fact that they're mates) they have had no down time to get to know each other. It has been one chase after another as she runs away or disappears. They have this difficulty of her bite being deadly to him and now his is to her too. They have not had a real chance to get to know each other but have accepted this fated love while the stuff she knows about him has mainly come from others telling her stuff about him. She knows almost none of it from him directly. In addition, we have had some stuff to do with his status and what her Grandfather's goal in uniting them might be and now it is implied he may be one of the original werewolves?

Do you see how it is too many complicated storylines at one time. They may even be good within the same story, because if they are fully developed they are interesting, but you have to address them more fully and I think concentrate on one or two max at one time. Let it be a little less confusing that way. Also, just watch if the story makes sense in certain spots. Two things in this chapter that bothered me: she knows she isn't supposed to run away again and I get that she was worried about how she felt when Alaron found her, but would she really get on a plane with him? I mean, duh!, you know you won't be going to the next town in a plane. Doesn't she think it'll upset Eian just a tad?

And as for Eian being at the party for 6 hours and not seeing her? I get it was a big party, but are you telling me you wouldn't look for your date during those 6 hours and expect to have seen her around? Just try to watch things like that so that the reader isn't sitting there going 'oh come on!'

I think you have good characters. I like how the vampires are different from the werewolves. You can sense their different natures in them. I like how Alaron is this twist of loving her but still is so selfish. I like how much Dravon and Aramis love her despite her not being of their blood. The werewolves of the pack are loving and family oriented as a pack would be. I'd love to see it work between Eian and her. They do seem to be fated to be together. I just would like to see it play out a bit more smoothly. I don't know if you are going in the direction of her becoming human again so she can be turned and become a werewolf, but I think that would be so far in the unrealistic category given the rest of the story that it would really not work well. I would recommend getting an editor or an extra reader to just give you impressions as you go which may affect where you take the story. Sometimes, by being removed a bit from the story which is trying to come out of your head, an outside reader can help you work it all out and give you honest feedback so you will know if it is going to work for your readers.

I wish you luck and I will read more when you come out with it. Comments are meant to be constructive when they can be. By using expletives and getting nasty, those people accomplish nothing but making themselves look like assholes (and usually they don't have the balls to do it under their name....it's easy to hurl insults when you're anonymous). So, don't let it get you down. Try to take comments from readers and take what you can from it. I look forward to seeing where you will take the story from here.

Eian is patient. If necessary, he'll wait. However, it would be nice if his sudden collapse could trigger her controls.

I must agree with the others

1. The only person who should die is Alaron.

"...first alaron goes away, now hes back, then shes trusting of him after hes fucked her life up not once, but twice (wait now 3 times)..."

Me think for him to die swift is too mercyful. he should really suffer first both body and mind. do looking forward to that... will be popping butter popcorn while it happen and enjoy his torture and the popcorn (so i have some mean sick streak about me so what? i'm human...partly ;) ...)

2. agrree with cannd said about 99.9 %

3. don't let Eian and Fiona split apart

Although I'm not sure if I will keep reading it. I don't look foward to the next chapter or the end 'cuase the story feel really messy with all the too much " stuffs " that happening with Fiona and the story. And on top of it you are saying that you are going to kill some one at the end and it's not going to be a happy ending. Which mean you are either gonna kill Eian or Fiona. I don't like it. I like happy ending that's why I read romance.

Thanks for the head up so i can stop reading and voting and comment on this story...it all depend on the next ch.

I must agree with the others

1. The only person who should die is Alaron.

"...first alaron goes away, now hes back, then shes trusting of him after hes fucked her life up not once, but twice (wait now 3 times)..."

Me think for him to die swift is too mercyful. he should really suffer first both body and mind. do looking forward to that... will be popping butter popcorn while it happen and enjoy his torture and the popcorn (so i have some mean sick streak about me so what? i'm human...partly ;) ...)

2. agrree with cannd said about 99.9 %

3. don't let Eian and Fiona split apart

Although I'm not sure if I will keep reading it. I don't look foward to the next chapter or the end 'cuase the story feel messy with all the too much " stuffs " that happening with Fiona and the story. And on top of it you are saying that you are going to kill some one at the end and it's not going to be a happy ending. Which mean you are either gonna kill Eian or Fiona. I don't like it. I like happy ending that's why I read romance.

Thanks for the head up so i can stop reading and voting and comment on this story...it all depend on the next ch.

I'm ok with alaron dying but please don't split fiona and eian up. Thanks it was a good story can't wait for the next chapter.

If it's Alaron! His selfishness has hurt Fiona three times already and I won't like it if Eian dies

I'm floored, you have taken this story not just to the next level, but several levels beyond that. Poor Fiona just can't catch a break thanks mostly to Alaron. He's just a self absorbed asshole! While at least Draven "seems" to care for her. Her grandfather, Lord Aramis Culzean, is about as trust worthy as Alaron, he just seems to be able to hide his personal agenda better. So where does this leave Fi? With the man who first found her and has loved her from the beginning,Eian. At first he loved the sweet innocent child she was,and then the young woman she became, and now? Of course he will love the woman she is becoming. Fi just needs someone to tell her the truth about being with Eian,whether it will kill one or both of them or whether it was more lies told by Alaron. I don't see Eian giving up on her, I just hope he has the internal strenght to not let Fi's new abilities overpower him. And oh yea, was it the pill or Fi fighting the urge to feed on the wedding guest that changed her? You always keep me entertained and wanting more. Thank for a great chapter.

i agree with MizT this chapter was out of this world. please continue on writing this story. don't listen to the other comments that tell you this story is not up to par. you have a great story i will be waiting for the next chapter...i definitely need to find out what you have in store for Eian and Fiona. Is his love for Fiona strong enough to handle her powers

I enjoy the changes and twists of your story. I cannot wait for the next chapter of the story, please don't keep us in suspence too long.

I was wondering how you were going to make Fiona more mature and it seems you've figured that out! You are really creative and the story is really interesting! Great job! I LOVE happy endings!

Have gotten over my shock now. First I can't understand how she could still love Alaron after he has already told her he killed all her family and changed her against her will and yet she still trusts him and believes him. Second I think Draven and Aramis really do care about her but would her grandfather kill Alaron? I doubt it even though he is furious. How can she still have any human gene left when her grandfather changed her blood for his over the months she was with them to make her a true Pureblood so I am now completely confused. As for Eian's bit killing her I doubt that since he has already told her that she would change if into a were in a previous chapter and she didn't want to yet as she had only just gone through one painful change and he wouldn't bit her if he thought she would die he knows better than that ass Alaron what would happen to her and Alaron is already wrong when he said Eian never sired anyone he sired his mother.

1st I have to say I'm in LOVE with Keiran. The picture you painted of him, everything he has done, the idea that HE is the original Were! He's a character I believe I'll carry for a very long time, like whitesabretooth's Amy, and JazCullen's Jared and Rafe.

I HATE that Fiona keeps trusting in Alaron after she's learned that he is the reason for every heartache and tragedy she has ever known, but I'm seeing this weakness as the chicken bone in the gravy.

I can see the very constructive points made by cannd, MizT and willieone, and like the other commenters, I have every faith that your storytelling abilities will answer our questions while entertaining us thoroughly.

I'm very new to the vampire/were life, so I don't know all the 'rules' or the 'Law'. But I do so love the different takes on how and why these two lifeforms are antagonistic with each other, and the varying degrees of history of the Were. Even thought he's a psycho, I thank Alaron for giving us some history on the Vampire/Were inter-relationships.

I truly am looking foward to the next chapter, and any other works you have instore!

I think she still loves him b/c despite what he did to her, and remember she found out about him being the one to kill her family after she had bonded to him and accepted him, he was the one to nurse her through the awakening. Remember how she described the horrific experience it was and he would stay with her and sleep on the floor when she was screaming and crying through the night. I think her sensitivity is as much a part of her life as her resiliency. I think she sees Alaron for the damaged soul that he is. They also bonded, I seem to think, over the experience of losing their mothers and yes, it is sick that he is the one that caused her to lose hers, but again, I think that she is incapable of hating him.

killed off Alaron. He's bloody annoying. Actually I wouldn't mind if you killed off any of the vamps. The only characters I even slightly care about are Eian and Fiona. This story still reads like a soap opera and the characters seem weak and juvenile. I'm irritated after every chapter. However, I want to know how it ends and I am curious enough to continue reading. That's a positive thing. Thanks for writing.

kill that bastard Alaron.

Kill Alaron-although his @sshole moves have discovered problems that need fixing before anyone gets hurt...

This series just gets better and better i just plain and simply LOVE ANYTHINK you write

Jorjiah xxx.

I love how Draven is towards Alaron. He is so awesome and insanely intelligent. I wish I knew someone like him.