All Comments on 'Too Close for Comfort B'

THANKS for sharing your talent...

If this was only your "B" game story, then your "A" game story must be fantastic, and I already used up all the stars on this one.

The twists and turns were very suspenseful, and kept me on edge through out the story.

The ending was clever and did make sense. A little bit of a stretch but mostly believable. Just as my little heart was sinking into the depths of dismal despair, you saved the day with a positive upbeat "No RAAC" ending, without falling into any of the old formula ending ploys.

I'm sure many of the "Bitch" writers will bitch, the wimps will whimper and whine, while the non-men become awestruck and be a little afraid of a protagonist with some balls, and of course all the little annony-mouses will squeak, squeak, squeak, then squeak some more.

But I shout unto you, in my deep masculine baritone;

"Fucking Awesome!!!"

Excellent story as usual, you had me fooled thinking Veronica and Grant were going to end up together when it was Rose, I salute you sir for that twist.

Seriously, man. Do you spend all your day on this stuff? If you have something to say, find a way to say it and let us move on. Christ almighty, this is tedious.

Need to find out from someone where is the A story published? Anyone? Anyone?

... you are piling it on too thick, which makes the story very formulaic and predictable. The female antagonist isn't only dumb, clueless, amoral, but is ALSO starting to get fat, old and unattractive. Her husband on the other hand is attracting the attention of the hottest women around and is successful in all areas of life.You can tell where this is going from a mile away.

Like I said, the writing is great and I have to give you top marks for that reason, but the story itself is sub-standard compared to your other work and could have been so much better.

Would somebody please send me the link for the Alpha version.

Thanks, Guy

if the story is tedious for you no one is forcing you to finish it. I liked it just like the other 160 stories SS06 has written. If someone would please send me the link to the A version i would enjoy reading that too.

Good writing as usual but far too long for a story you've told literally atleast 100 times. If I made a bingo sheet of all the btb cliches I would have been better off just dumping black paint on the sheet and calling it a day. I don't know how this can be the short version but I assume based on past stories you will really drive the point across that the wife is a stupid psychotic whore who will try for vengeance and then fail spectacularly before either going to jail or dying.

I appreciate your work... but dude you've become the micheal bay of this site. All style, no substance, and the lowest common denominator (who refer to themselves as "real men") love the shit out of your work. All that said like micheal bay it tends to be alot of fun provided you turn your brain off and are looking for nothing more than "the whore gets hers and the dude rides off into the sunset."

Tldr: 3 stars. Change your game up man. Either that or shorten it up or use your more fantastical settings.

Got bored after 4 pages and stopped reading. Tedious is the perfect description of this one.

this was long and I fully expected to take a break after 5 or 6 pages. But it was too interesting and I sat here until I finished. This woman was totally delusional! I started making notes re her idiocy so I comment if the reconciled, but the list just got to be so long that I stopped. The one thing, however, that sticks in my mind is why Dahl ever agreed to go on this trip with two single women. (She certainly knew what kind of slut Mary was!) The author initially painted Dahl as a "free spirit." But she loved her husband unconditionally. That woman would never have taken that vacation.

way too long . Couldnt finish. Sorry. No rating . Look forward to your next story.

Well I made it half way through, waiting for Dahlia to tell Grant she was raped, then blackmailed into all kinds of sex, which is the truthful setup here. Apparently, (at least by the time I got frustrated and stopped reading) it never occurred to her to do that.

I always enjoy your stories because of the detail and how we get to see inside someone's head. More importantly, Turtle Wax Ice is great stuff. I really like Mother's California Gold Spray Wax. I have both and Mother's comes off easier when it is humid.

I guess I was fascinated by the question of how clueless she could be. When her girl friend declared that they had come to Jamaica she should have grabbed the next plane out... or perhaps she was curious?

I gave it a 4 and I'll give SOL's version a 10. It is a shame that there appears to be censoring in favor of cuck and wimp stories(yuck). In fact, there seems to be a number of my favorite BTB stories gone from this site. Good job and thx Stang.

I know you warned us up front that it was long, but I've read your other long stories, and they don't SEEM long, this one just dragged on and on and on.....

I got annoyed at the "friends" who INSISTED that she and Grant were too close and she had to get away, then, before they even arrived in Jamaica were telling her she was crazy to leave.

Then all the shit she got for fucking other guys. They were effectively divorced, Grant wasn't giving her any, and TOLD her she was free to get relief. Her only fault was not being as discreet as she thought she was.

Please disregard my earlier request: I don't want to reread this again.

Almost from the get-go, this seemed to be nothing more than people circling the drain after the toilet was flushed.

How brain dead was this guy? What do men think unescorted women do in the Caribbean Islands? Perhaps they sit in their rooms at night drinking club soda and playing cribbage with other lonely 'single' women?

Not!

I don't feel sorry for him - he got what he deserved for allowing it to happen!

Guy

It was predictable and long drawn out. As usually another straying wife who is portrait as dumb. Punished for her failure after drugged ,to not stray further, she lives a loveless arrangement with her soon to be ex. Only to gain hundreds of pounds of weight . So she should haved moved on too but the author always seems to follow the same script. Just bad for me is kind.

Dull as all get out. It seems StangStar has lost it. Two stars only.

You warned me that it was long but you didn't say it was tedious. 2*

Cheers!

Too long and too boring. You're too high on yourself to realize when more than half of a story could be cut without effecting anything.

I am writing a long story because I don't have time to write a short story. Tell you what --- leave it in the pen. **

Can't find it under "Too Close for Comfort"

Long diatribe cut.

Stop repeating yourself, both in plot and in your writing. One paragraph had the same damned idea stated three (3) times.

It would help if your female characters had an IQ higher than room temperature. But that would necessitate thought into the 'why's of infidelity to have a smart woman cheat. Not a can of worms to open here....

A four hundred pound unemployed psycho first wife - only Stang can come up with these women. This one was so dumb and narcissistic it was funny in parts. Five stars from me - I liked all 11 pages. I do wonder, though, what it would be like to have a true connection like the couple in the story had before Jamaica. Never had that.

The only thing I find distracting in many of these tales is how the "soul mate" turns to strange slut overnight? It is a strange paranoid nightmare theme. I have seen shitty marriages and I have seen people cheat. I have never seen a truly good marriage where the spouse was really surprised that the other cheated on them. Cheating is usually the final nail in the coffin. People in happy marriages do not cheat. It is that simple, there is no reason to cheat. If one of them is mentally ill, then the marriage was not good. That being said, I still liked the story - it was fun to read and as always contained the undercurrent of humor that is this authors trademark.

A very charitable 5!

Longer isn't necessarily better.

Too much attention to needless details.

I've read all or most of your stories and liked quite a few of them... but this one... eh, not so much.

I found myself scrolling through whole sections of it... it's kind of discouraging that this woman was intelligent enough to attract his attention so that he ended up marrying her... and attentive enough that they say they spend 23 hours a day together... yet she's so stupid that she allows herself to be used... so inattentive that she doesn't even notice his sadness in relation to her wanting to take the trip...? That they know what each other is thinking... but in this one instance that completely fails her...?

And all of the games that he started playing on her...? Occam's razor... yet you completely ignored that here and intentionally made it convoluted...

Plus, I swear I've read portions of this story before and who wants a rehash...?

And her sex drive is so out of control that she HAS to get screwed...? That, again, she's so stupid that she figures any sex is worth the risk of her marriage...? And she never thought of birth control while getting screwed in Jamaica...?

You sure she isn't stupider than a rock...? Come on, give the "complete idiot when it comes to anything sexual" storyline a rest, you're a better author than that... aren't you...?

Are we there yet? How much longer?

Still haven't been to the doc for the verbal diarrhea have you?

So Dahlia did not want to believe the truth. Grant lived with her under the conditions he set out, nothing more. Does 'staying together for the kids' ever really works out?

I usually LOVE! your long ass stories---but NOT this one. I really don't think 11 pages was necessary. It could've been done in 4 -6 pages. Grant fucking the slut even AFTER knowing she's become the towns whore reminded me of just plain Bob stories where he knows he's gotta slut as a wife but he just HAVE to eat and fuck her. I hate those stories. I actually thought this was a RAAC story. I gave it a 3, only because I didn't feel anything for this story.

Not to show my ignorance, but what does RACC mean?

I know that BTB is Burn The Bitch.

Are there other codes I should know?

While I agree with other posters that this wasn't your best work and did kinda drag out to long due, I think this was just due to how it looked like this story was going to end. The ending not only genuinely took me by surprise but was pretty cool.

@KarenE

RAAC = Reconciliation At All Costs.

You asked about RACC. That I don't know, but there are two that are close:

RAAC is Reconciliation At All Costs

WACC is Wimp Assed Crying Cuckold

Thanks, all!

@nonethewiser, I did mean RAAC, thanks again.

unless some one is tossing hand grenades, TK U MLJ LV NV

Close to the bottom of Stangtale heap ... but that heap is mostly Fivers, with a small smattering of Fours. All the way through, I knew I was reading a fictional story. Not sure why ... I haven't liked main characters (both, in this case) before and voted 'five' so that factor doesn't explain my unwillingness to get into the tale. Oh, well!

I concur that the story was like Sweetie ... more than svelte at the beginning, and WAY overweight at the end. Especially obvious if a reader is not 'into' it.

4*

Sorry not entertaining, not even funny.

This on totally sucked swamp water! *1

Posted on SOL

Just skimmed the "A" version for the differences. The added revenge plot makes the story. I cannot help wonder why this site allows incest stories but censors violence.

Really? This site censors violence? Have you read Loving Wives? The amount of murder and rape that is directed towards the women in these stories is absolutely stunning if you think it's 'censored'.

From time to time people have made the charge about SS06 that he has a problem moving past a certain stereotype about women and wives in particular. And for the longest period of time I thought that charge against SS06 t was kind of unfair.

After reading this terrible awful story I think it's safe to say that SS06 as a serious issues with women.... at least in the LW genre here at LIT .

1. The wife was essentially Drugged RAPED then blackmailed in Jamaica. The wife NEVER even intends to make that argument or defense.

2 after their legally divorced still living in the same house the wife figure she has 4 years to try and win her husband. When she gets so unbelievably horny to the point where she HAS to have sexual needs 'Taken care of " she decides to meet other men and ... FUCK THEM IN THE HOUSE ????

Nobody could possibly be this stupid. Up to this point the story seems to be working pretty well . But the whole thing falls apart when this overrated author throws in this unbelievable plot twist.

3 Even the wife recognize that even though her husband said that he would "OK" if she has sex with other men... the wife knows that he could not and would not accept it. Which makes her decision to bring them home to their house to fuck the other guy ...where the husband MIGHT see them... even more explicable.

4 Forgetting to go to the abortion clinic until it was almost too late? FORGETTING ?

5. The silly transition of the wife ...from someone who is determined to win back her husband and NEVER have sex with anyone else EVER again to

to town cunt. It's badly done... it is wholly inconsistent with the motives and it happened way too fast

I don't know why anyone is surprised by this story. Stang has always been a rape apologist. The story he's basically just retelling here was also about a woman who gets raped and then blamed for it because she was dressed a certain way or went to a party. So of course she deserved what she got, just like all the BTB crowd who fall all over themselves to worship Stang here will say this wife deserved what she got for going on vacation.

Women deserve to be assaulted and raped for behaving immorally, and then they deserve to have their lives ruined because they are ashamed of that fact and don't report it, one of the single most common reactions of real women to this kind of crime.

If you liked it, you have the same problem the author has. He has been bitten on the arse and now finds it necessary to portray all women as devious, irrational and hysterical. When he can bring himself to move on he might be worth reading. It's not as if he lacks talent.

The A version of this tale over on Sol is so much better its a shame Stang fans had to read the B version first :( Dennis more than deserved his fate.

@frontlinecaster

You rather conveniently leave out the part where Dahlia willing had sex with Dennis the following day to just try out another guy. It's this major fact that fucked up her marriage.

It's difficult to read this stuff because the characters are so stupid.

If you try to put yourself in the place of the protagonists, you realize that you would never act like that.

Sorry but this story doesn't make it.

Thanks . SS06 your stories are like oatmeal at breakfast.

Healthy and filling. But the same , mush every day. Wait sometimes you add a few raisins or maybe maple syrup. It's all good, Thank You again. You give me what I believe is right...And here I go and complain!! Sorry.

AMerryMan

P.S. I'm not going to comment anymore, I will rate your stories. Thank You again!!

Curiosity got the better of me and I checked out the A version. Although a bit over the top for my taste it did balance the story out. It turned a seeming runaway wimp into a man. I bet the WACC jobs really hate it.

I don't know that it was too long but it simply had trouble keeping my interest piqued as much as most of your stories do. I think the big "fake out" was contrived. No way that the scheme to have Grant fuck her until his loved burned away was silly and totally out of character for the sensitive man you made him out to be. You do well on character development but in this instance you didn't stay true to the characters and their relationships. Seemed more contrived than normal. You do know how to create self centered, out of touch, psycho bitches but in this case the scenario doesn't work.

I made it to page 2. Your characters are so stupid it was painful to read about them. Your depiction of Jamaica was Hell on earth. The interesting thing about Hell is that unlike Jamaica, nobody is there that doesn't want to be there. Reading about Grant and Dahlia's experience of Hell on earth because they needed to be MORONS for the sake of your plot was the clue I needed to quit ; and just like beating your head against the wall, it felt sooo good to stop.

Stand, do you have a life. Why do you keep writing this crap. First the stories are TOO LONG and full of HORSE SHIT. We don`t give a rats ass about Mustangs.

You are the only author that repeatedly degrades their female characters with rape and then somehow transforms them into wanton sluts before the stories’ end.

You are telling the same story over and over and over again. In summary, the loyal wife, perfect for 18 to 24 years gets involved in an incident. She’s raped, in a number cases repeatedly. She fails to tell of her degradation, the husband finds out and divorces her (no ifs, no ands, no buts).

By the time of the divorce the wife thinks the rape was an enlightening intro to her new lifestyle.

Then a third of the story is the ex trying to get back with her former mate. Does that sound familiar? It should. You’ve told it AT LEAST 10 times.

Oh, and the story needs to take at least 9 pages to tell (with Mustang anecdotes added for so-called levity).

You can write any story you want; that’s your right as an author. But RAPE IS RAPE!!!! How much do you have to hate women to write of their RAPES with such detachment and ambivalence?

I read your stories and think that you are 2 steps away from gleefully telling us about an honor killing of a gang rape victim. You can’t hate women that much! I hope that you don’t and that these stories are a reflection that you are stuck on a formula and like the accolades of the BTB crowd who would be as comfortable in Karachi stoning a 10-year old bride who has defied her husband.

I only hope that the audience is not driving these sick, twisted tales.

unless is involves STDs TK U MLJ LV NV

and address will be banned.

wife/bitch/girlfriend write another stupid story under your name, women have no logic no reason no grasp of emotional pain, they talk so much it never sinks in, hence they cant write worth shit about cheating and remorse.

SS

Some of your stories run longer than necessary, but I really enjoy them. Both are true of this story. 5.

mr angry & mr neanderthal , do not have the patience or the intellectual acuity to read eleven pages , BTB tales really need to be kept to 5 pages or less , otherwise the haters&flamers will have forgotten the 1st half of the story by the time they reach the end.

for those who enjoy a good long read of ten pages or more , the story needs more new & diferent content .. not a rehash as seems to be the case with this tale.

having said all that , i think the story has scored lower than it deserves , it's a worthy 4 star .. i would have been surprised to see it with a hot "H" .. but it merits a 4.20 to 4.35 score

not enthralling , not riveting , not insightful .. but still an enjoyable, well written story , with workable plot & protagonists .. i like the Authors style of using the big hammer , to nail his points solidly to the wall. The extremes of good/bad, fair/unfair, smart/dumb .. etc , the way he over emphasizes the events has a distinct style. though on occasion that can detract from the reading experience & make the story somewhat belaboured at times.

on a deeper level , one has to wonder wether the whole eleven pages was simply put together to deliver the hammer blow of the last two paragraphs ....

The therapist was sound asleep ....

total love & utter hate .. sometimes so closely linked

and sometimes you have heard it all before & it's as boring as hell.

xxxhugsxxx

TwistedOliver.

godbless & sleep well .

zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

a few too many twists. and way too dark.

The attorney who was supposed to be representing Grant would find herself brought before the state bar association on ethics violation charges and disbarred for the stunt she pulled off--representing Dahlia's interests instead of Grant's after being retained by Grant.

In addition, a divorce cannot be placed on hold to become effective at a future date in reality. In most jurisdictions, a divorce which is not finalized within a year of being filed is dismissed and must be refiled.

You really need to do better legal research because it is the glaring weakness in your writing....

Obviously written by a wanker.

SSA is the best writer on here. let's see if you can write your name. You are the worst, like a fucking terrorist!! Hiding in shit and attacking , I gave it a 5 and hope you die

"Here's another tale of loss and woe "

not a happy or likeable character in it. It even put the therapist to sleep.

You're without a shadow of a doubt my favourite author on this site and I love every single one of your stories (and yes, I've read every one); thing is I think this is the only one I disagree with the ending of. I kinda wanted them to get back together. I'm not quite sure why...

unless one is playing grenades or bombs. TK U MLJ LV NV

Nice twists. Five stars.

"I hate you Dahlia," he said. "No wonder Grant doesn't care who you fuck. You're garbage." - Yup, that summed it up. The only problem is that when you have garbage, you have to dispose of it. You do not keep it for four years for sentimental value. Yes, there are times when it is the right thing to do to stay married for the kids - this wasn't one of those times. She was a slutpig and you do not keep those in the house. So, while it was another well written story, it took a long time to get to where it should have been by page 3.

great writing.

I felt a bit sad for the wife by the end.

She was drugged then blackmailed.

Her only failing was continuing after that time.

Even then maybe she could have saved herself, but continuing to cheat was the nail.

Writers use the whole, I have to have sex tool in stories, but really, doesnt exist so much.

Your stories normally make sense to me but this one. The wife is smart and deeply in love with the husband. After talking to some people at the job she looses her mind and want to go with them away from the husband who she is normally joined at the hip to! Did she know them at all or just work at the same location. Yes this is a story but please change something to remove how loyal she was at the beginning of the story. There was no way she left him to be with them on a vacation without him. They must have gave her drugs or something to affect that fast and complete a change in that woman. Then the overly long story to be told by the suddenly stupid wife until the end. That didn't match the beginning of the story. This was like two and a half stories mixed together. I like reading a lot of your writing but not this one but, thank you for your work.

The story sucked. She was stupid and deserved to suffer some. What bothered me is that no one cared about her rape and blackmail. I would have hired a hitman to take out all involved in her downfall. In the end she should lose the weight ,find a man , and get on with her life. She suffered but life goes on.

Long, convoluted, unbelievable as well as unlikable characters annnnd... BORING!

Nailed it. At some point, we need to empathize with at least one character. Better if we are conflicted by feelings for more than one character. The only character I didn't despise was Rose probably because she was a stick figure without enough definition to care about. Not your best effort.

.... Cardboard characters...

.. and who the hell was Any and where did she come from?

Very repetitive. Dahlia is just written too compulsively to be believed. And where in the world did this Amy come from anyway?

And considering he hadn't had sex for years, yu'd think our hero would have thrown a fuck at Veronica just to relieve the pressure. He was after all a divorced man with no reason to be faithful to a cheating whore. The way he's written you'd almost have to put him into the cuckold category. Yeah, she can fuck anybody she wants but there's no arrangement for him to. What a load of shit. Dick get hard, pussy is presented, fucking ensues. It's just nature. What is written here is just not natural.

I liked the story ... the end sucked. The way he handled the end was mean and cruel. He essentially used her to set up his final good by. What she did wasn't excusable but he had no class or compassion in the day he left. To let her think that there might be a reconciliation and then introduce her replacement at a party is, as I said, just mean spirited. Not one of your better endings. I still gave it a 5 though I don't know why.

Not sure Grant was a fair to Dylan, she was blackmailed into sex with many men by a sharp operator who made a living working the venerable wifes - (liquor, drugs, & video). However, Dylan could not stay true to her promise to not cheat again, so now Grant took the opening Dylan gave him. Using Dylan for sex was really a way to pay her back and keep her hopes up until he felt it was enough.

In the end I felt so sorry for Dahlia. Grant ended up being one cruel so and so.

FBG

Either reconcile or divorce. Don't string the readers on through that garbage because you think it's funny to pull a trick at the end. That was horrible. Yeah Dahl deserved the divorce, but stringing her along was fucked up and served no point at all. It was a waste of time to read this story. I'm am very glad I skimmed this instead of reading it. Stories like this are why I skim in the first place. 1 star.

I don't give a shit about any of them. You drag things so long and made both the wife and the husband truly disgusting people.

So they signed the papers and the divorce would be final in 4 years. I think that’s just about how long it took me to read this story. But I kept plugging, thinking that the ending would be worth the effort. Well....not so much. Instead of a big bang at the end it turned out to be more of a slow fizzle. Oh well. Onward.

Why did it take so much and eleven pages for that ending.

If you read the story you would know there is no RAAC.

Definitely a different twist than the usual SS06 stories but it was still entertaining.

I have become a fan of StangStar's work but this isn't one of his best. The main problem for me is that I didn't have much empathy with any of the characters.

Dahlia ended up cheating more through stupidity than malice and whatever her many faults she never tried to hurt her husband deliberately.

In contrast, Greg's cruel. vindictive and cynical response to his wife's cheating ran contrary to the story's premise that he was a 'good' man. Good men don't subject other human beings to the level of premeditated cruelty and humiliation that he inflicted on his wife. They either forgive them or divorce them.

The smug, self-righteous daughters weren't much better - mummy was seeing other men because daddy told her that she should because he wasn't interested, which makes her a whore - daddy was fucking Amy behind mummy's back, which makes him a victim. God protect us from children with this kind of moral compass.

Dahlia - for all her faults and cheating - was the only character who seemed to possess an iota of human warmth and sincerity (she really made an effort to rekindle her marriage) Of course, she should have seen the writing on the wall and left the cold hearted prick early in the game but she was too needy and not very bright - and, in the real world, bastards, hypocrites and psychopaths usually win in the end.

LA

You missed how very closely Grant was attached to Dahlia. Anywhere other than fantasy and their codependency is more than a bit unhealthy.

Panic attacks when she went to the store alone. The mental and emotonal despondency he was dealing with by the time she returned from being gone for a week was cause for institutional confinement.

Then he finds she picked up an STD and infected him. Just coming to terms with that crusher, and he finds her in serious medical trouble because of complications from abortion. He is soon to learn she had lots of sex with a number of strangers during a gangbang.

Your defense of her is she was not responsible for actions. She made foolish mistake, was coerced....NO SHE MADE THREE DECISIONS all by herself. She chose to not go with Glenda and stay with slut Mary. She chose to get loaded, drunk, a remain with stranger on deserted beach. She chose to give in to blackmail, never good idea.

Her actions CHANGED Grant - almost destroyed him.

She then humiliated her daughters by becoming town slut.

I guess if she was your spouse or mother you would congratulate her. Way to go mom!

You never addressed that most of what happened in Jamaica was coerced - technically rape. Had to stop reading after the Ashley Madison incident. That was so out of the character you had created that it made it unbelievable. Big incomplete.

Overall the story sucked. Nobody is like that dependent on any woman.

Read the first two pages; got bored, felt like I had read this before, and skipped to the last page - didn’t feel like I had missed anything.

PEEEEUUUUUKKKKKKKEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!

Story remains the same, only the names have changed.

Come on man you write better than this?

I got through about three pages, and gave up. Two Stars.

You really need to track down the "A" version. It's not hard to find just Google his nam de plume and voila, bingo and shazzam...there is a link. Trust me the man is not a wimp, just don't say "What" to Grant, he tends to lose all sense of humor at that point. Things make a lot more sense in the "A" version and you're going to like Andy. Signed: BTW

A 400 lb. wife? After all the nonsense she dumped on him and then gaining all that weight? It would have been like having sex with a whale. She was delusional to think they would get back together. Grant'a lawyer was a clever woman the way she got the wife to sign those divorce paper.

Wow a 400 pound wife ?? I have a Golden rule never date anyone who weighs more then I do .. I have a fear that a 400 pound lady would be on top and suffocate Me ..