All Comments on 'Unwanted Sex Becomes Desired'

you seem to change the tenses and viewpoints very randomly?

I am not shure if this is intended or not, but for a non-native speaker like me it is very confusing! I think an editor would help greatly!

Otherwise very hot idea! Keep on writing!

I am looking forward reading more of your stories!

... you went on and on and on.

If you had limited the cast of characters being fucked to the original narrator, and Greta, and Greta's mother screwed by the narrator and (maybe) one other guy it would have been plenty, and you could have developed the characters of each (from their own POV)

It went beyond suspension of disbelief when Greta agreed to "audition"

Your spelling is terrible! Sometimes it is so bad that I lose the direction of the story or missunderstand who is speaking or hearing the discussion. Get a proof reader that doesn't rely on Word Spell Check....is doesn't tell the difference between you and your etc....

You lost me on the first page when the guy found a barrier in the girl's pussy after he got his cock in her. This runs rampant on this site, the barrier is first then you get in the pussy. I can't read a story when I see the author has no clue about the hymen. Read or look at the pretty pictures on this link: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hymen

RS