All Comments on '"We'll Do Your Mom First," I Said'

A very nicely developed story, but it peaked when Will and Kevin both had Kevin's mom repeatedly. The subsequent scenes with Natalie and Will's mother were not written with anywhere near as much passion...or detail. Still, the ovderall narrative arc was quite satisfying.

I'm looking forward to and expecting a sequel involving the three girls, Ashley, Caitlyn, and Brianna. They deserve a reward for their transformation efforts and of course there is their prom.

don't wait so long before writing them.your stories are truely missed.wish you well and thanks for the stories.

Once again you have done it. I love to read your stories and recommend them highly to everyone on this site. Please keep offering us these pieces of heaven to enjoy.

just what i love to read about,please keep going,, love to read your stories

Another interesting read. Keep the great stories coming.

WTF does this story have to do with summer? I gave up after the first boring page and a half and skimmed it. This doesn't belong in the contest.

I thoroughly enjoyed your story, well written and the characters seemed quite realistic.

so many words?

Great story, if you had half as much fun writing it as I did reading it, you had a great time!

Another great story Jim, thank you very much.

Enjoyed every word! Well written. Another great story from one of my favorite writers.

Thanks

i allways do enjoy my stories long cuz it atleast gives time for da story line to develop... It really was a good read though would have enjoyed more if the "fapping" parts were a bit more detailed... It was da only thing that stopped me from giving it a 5...

Cheers and i do hope to read more longer stories from u

p.s i am a sucker for high school stories with da boy forming a harem of busty babes ;-)

I really enjoyed reading about Will and Kev banging Kev's mom and later Will's mom. but I really enjoyed the twist at the end where Will and Kev have sex with each other. It was quite poetic really. Since they had shared everything else the only thing they had not shared with each other were themselves. Great job!

Nicely crafted story. Well put together.

I enjoyed your story immensely! It was definitely a 5 Star read. Thanks for having written it.

You should right another story which continues on, maybe Ashley visits Princeton could be the title. Cuz you could tell the emotion behind Ashley and what she wanted but never said

Don't listen to the attention challenged people who say the story was too long. The problem is it was too short! I agree with some other commenters that the sex scenes were way too short, esp. after the first mother. This is a story that deserves to be fleshed out, and continued.

what a fantastic story !

Have to go finger myself now...

A well written story with lot's of interesting elements. Keep up the good work.

Far as I'm concerned, the best story of your's I've read in a long time. Maybe some college exploits. As for WTF, you should have read it all, it happened during the SUMMER.

I love the story, you always manage to find a new way to make the old line sexy. Can't wait for the next ones!!!!!

Thank you for NOT having everyone fucking like bunnies by the thir paragraph. Your investment of a bit of time for proper seduction was well worth while.

Definitely one of your best. Keep 'em coming.

But you need to be bit more careful. A few obvious errors and there were parts that I had to re-read a few times to try to get what you were saying. But for the most part it hot me fucking hot. Good work.

I'd like to take this opportunity to thank every reader who took the time to vote, comment and/or e-mail me. I truly appreciate all the support I have received.

FYI: In its first week on the site the story has been opened over 135,000 times by LITEROTICA readers and has received 925 votes from voters in 31 different countries.

It also was awarded a prize by the ASSOCIATION of INDEPENDENT READERS, a worldwide erotic book reading group.

Thank you so much,

james r scories (jim)

Nice story, something completely different

great story ... keep making us cum scouries...

The story was really nice especially as it reached its end, it became nicer. It became lovelier with every page I read. All the characters were nicely chosen and plot well described. Hope to see more from you in future.

Great story. Very different from others, like the turn around. Well done

Loved the way you set it out and bringing the sister in to help

great

Brilliant,  absolutely Brilliant, as always.  Thank-you so much for taking the time and effort with your works.

thank you for the story! it made me sit all night imagining things during and after reading. Its really a great one, its different and full of surprises. Id love if you could personally email me of anything. windarwin10@yahoo.com. 09268512398 im darwin

I loved your story. and I always did your previous ones as well. You take your time developing the story and the characters. and that does build up the anticipation. and you know how to make love to a woman, how to heat her up etc., Great stories that make me want to fuck right now. Hats off to you.

In this story, I would have liked it, if you would have given more detail on the love scene between the hero and his mom. you didn't give much there. that was a bit disappointing and the only minus I can see here.

Looking forward to more stories from you!

i absolutely loved your story,it was amazingly well written. if u read this i hope u feel privalages because this is only my second comment on all of the stories i have read. i think the next story,if u wright another one with the same characters,i think you should deffinitely have some form of incestual meeting between Ashley and Will,and Ashleys friends

great reading ,kept hard the whole way through.

thanks

Hope you will have the stories about their home visits soon

Man, I can't wait for more. He should bang his sister.....

It was very well written but I think the part where the two boys raped the drugged mom detracted from the otherwise excellent presentation. Rape is a crime, even in a fictional story. A proper man would never take a woman without her willing and knowing conscious consent.

Great story and wonderful to read a story not needing major spell check

work! You're a favorite of mine!

As a 60 year old man, I clearly remember my first but sure as hell wasn't lucky enough to have a friend like your's or two willing loving Mother's to assist in the most valauable of all's "lessons in life!"

Well written, progressed as something of this nature would and the final shareing of son's in the same bed apparently told me your story was more than arouseing! The bulge in my slacks proves it!

Well typed and I read it all in about maybe 7 hours do to needing to make food and other stuff around the house

I agree w/former poster; an encore story, returning home during school vacation & "paying" back the ladies would make some enticing reading.

Rape poster's comments...yes, sex w/out consent is rape, it did happen & was part of the story. Fortunately, for the boys, that mother didnt pursue it in that manner, but instead fulfilled her tastes.

Jim Scouries, this story was well written, cant wait to read others written by you.

Cheers!

The story was well written, it deserved a 5, the rape was really a turn off & thus the 4

Great story. I agree that the non-consent was a bummer.

Very well written. Keep up the good work.

as a 62 year old man from a family of 4 sisters and 5 brothers from england.i loved every bit, i think the rape bit was introduced as a twist to the story, the story had to move on, i have had sex with 3 of my sisters, and 2 of my brothers. my father watched me have sex with one sister, he didnt know i knew he was watching, i learnt a lot from my family and i dont think it did me any harm, im not a dirty old man, but i know a lot about everyday life, and it also made me look at life at every angle. one life live it.

well written, i just had to finish, will there be more, i hope so.

Will you write a sequel when they return - and also about the babies!

Please let me know if you do, or any more

will we get another about when they come home or the babies? very well written

Very nicely written. Will there be a another part on a return during Christmas or holiday week Can't wait. Thank You

Did they have to get pregnant lol?? Really? Just say they were on the pill or something but don't intice incest babies into this story they'll have birth defects.

good story but WAAAAAAAAAAAy to wordy (wordey??)

I thoroughly enjoyed this yarn. I hope you keep writing.

Great lead up to the main event...well worth reading the back ground to establish the basis for the act. Thank you for your effort.

As always a great read and I myself prefer a long story I highlight the address bar and paste to the desk top until I finish then delete. Works every time. I'm not much on mother son pregnancies it need to be avoided, If you need pregnancy do the sister if you must lol. Thanks for an enjoyable story and good luck with the contest my friend.

very good read, one of the best ones ever

a little wordy but overall a very good read

GREAT STORY. To bad Kev could have been Monica's fourth. Will be looking forward to Ashley and friend's PROM NIGHT. What if the paternity shows Kevin is the father of Laura's baby and Will is the father of Michelle's baby. A future story may reveal all the answers and more love.

seriously its one of the best story i've evr reed......

Your spontaneity and intelligence are refreshing and necessary for a good read, but can be spiced up with a more careful use of adjectives, especially in the sexual terms dept. And jack up your emotionality even further. albeit subtly. More cynicism, more manly confidence in the writing process, more punch. You really have it. But I sense you are underestimating your powers of evocation. Just be yourself. Your humor is your greatest attribute, and can be upped by contrasting it with highly suggestive, evocative images. I'm waiting for that great erotic novel. More power to your elbow.

Hi, just to add to my previous comment: Fucking and falling in love with your mom or sis is a primal, orgiastic affair beyond understanding, something that reaches back to the mists of prehistory and to the dawn of a future, higher eroticism, something that should wring all your passion and creativity out of you. Please trust in yourself and don't fall into a pose, don't start acting out. Become shockingly intimate if you will, don't mind us and spill your guts as only you can. If you do, you WILL write one of our age's iconic erotic novels, one that will set the tone of the 21st century's sexuality.

i lilked the story......but i fellonly the sexual encounter of Mrs. white has been given craftfully......all the other encounters were short and unappealing......i felt that the author should have at least given equal importance to Will's mother as well.....and the unnecessary description of what ashley did to make over her brother and his friend was not required at all....

good subject and character developement but it was loaded with unimportant , trivial and wasteful dealings with clothes and perfume etc. It could have been half the length and more to the point. still it made me explode because I loved the taboo hot parts when they finally came.

as the title of the comment good story,could have a little about the time at the cottage,but otherwise a very good story.

You could have described the Sex more, but everything but that was perfect.

a long story, but exciting..............could have been more fun if sexual adventures of ashley an her friend hv been included.................but overall a rocking story...........

Kind of long but I very much enjoyed it, could have hoped for him to fuck his sister also but I guess I can't have everything... What about a return bout with his mom an sister and both mothers with his bun in ther oven???

One of the best storyes so far. i im specting a secon part were will sister appear and bouth mothers preagnet.

I would love to play the role Will in your story. Keep it up ;).

i'm just at lost for words. i just hope i found this earlier. script well written. that's right, it's a "script" not just a mere story. this should've been turned into a movie.

a vivd masterpiece that should never had to end. perhaps a second part to this story is pending, with sister and friends, and perhaps fathers walking in on their wives being fucked by their sons. another brilliant piece

Brought my exciting sex dreams of years ago to life

one of the best stories i have read so far. Really a great story.

Love it brah

Nice incest ???? Mom fucking is THE B E S T !!!!!

Fantastic story. Small blemish, though, if these kids are awesome enough to seduce their moms, and share them successfully, why the date-rape scene?

And then the stripper AND the prom queen. Very relatable, really good writing.

Fucking two friends thier moms alternately is real incest if included sis & dad then family orgies.....

veryyy good i was hoping u might have thrown something in with ashley at the end, but still a fantastic story

Another awesome story. 5 stars! ^__^

What a GREAT story! You definitely have a talent. I am a fan now!!!! THANKS

your ego way exceeds the quality of your work and those who fave'd you are illiterate morons

A great story, made me smile in so many places.

You absolutely captured my first terrible dates. Horny as hell and no idea what to do to lose my virginity. I did actually go to a professional dance teacher for my first school dance. She was drop dead gorgeous and did all the hugging. She just knew the effect she was having on a horny 17 year old. Congratulations.

Great story but a scene with Ashly woulda been very nice, possibly with her friends too. But overall I think you managed to get a lot of guys's highschool illiteracy with wemon captured, with even a bit of advice in it aswell

It would have been so erotic if the boys had both mothers in the same room so thier moms could watch them in action fucking each others momsI

Wow best story i have seen! Must have took you ages to wright. A scene with Ashley and her friends would be hot :)

You really captured the whole not sure "nerd" unfortunatly I know that feeling well, only I am a woman but suffered the same insecurities and such.... This was an amazing story!!! Very Very well written.....

nice story, i really love this story coz it depicts the transformation of nerds into handsome hunks. Hatsoff to your parience and imagination...

I never wanted to read this story because the title made it sound cheesy. I finaly decided to read it, due to the high ratings. This story was very well written. I prefer longer stories, and I see hardly any room for improvement. Perhaps a little more description of the women. At the same time, however, a little less description adds more room for one's imagination! Keep up the good work. A short sequel involving Ashly and her friends would be nice.

It would have been cool if Kevin and will put both of their cocks in the same time in kevins mom

This is one of the best stories I have read in my entire life. Good work

This is one of those stories that are easy to read: they are wealthy, they are intelligent, they are hung, they have nice families, and very understanding ones, they all fuck happily with no second thoughts. Guess what? I, after all, like it. Only don't understand why they have to get pregnant. This doesn't fit in the playground. And nowaday nobody will get pregnant if it's not ignorant people or if they don't want.

I didn't waste anymore time reading this. I just gave it 1 star

Man you have to write a sequel. I want Will to get with Ashley, Bri, and caitlin. Make Ashley's fun a bit graphic and detailed also if you write one.

Really good, thanks for sharing, hoping to see some brother-sister action with Will and Ashley in the sequel

Loved it, very interesting, I managed it in one sitting. My only complaint would be, that adverse to the whole story, most of the erotic and / or sex scenes were... Short... Rushed... Not too detailing.

Apart from that, good story.

Fucking Awesome! lol

By the time I finished reading it I was sooooo horny. I couldn't help but get my tube of glue and stuff it inside of me as deep as it would go. I was so wet that it just slid in and out.... mmm~

I forgot to lock my door so my brother came in just as my orgasm started. He just kept watching me. Damn, if only he was a bit older.

That was a good story not only sexy at times but interesting you had my attention the whole time,you should write a book of course not incest but a normal book even at the non-sexual times it was still fun to read

Scouries:

This was a great read, exciting, boyhood dreams fulfilled, and I'm sure brought everyones virgin stories back to the present. Good job enjoyed very much.