All Comments on 'Someday Ch. 01'

I like where this is going :-)

I'm liking this so far.

Yes keep going, and you have a fun writing style. I like friends who become romantic stories the best. It's also good that you did not write a long lead in if you had no intention of going erotic at first.

I forgot to mention, please do NOT have Dana be all unsure/low self-esteem where Avery/Jamie has to spend 5 chapters building her self-confidence.

You do have a great writing style and I'm looking forward to the rest. I do agree with the other commentators, don't make Dana insecure, but confident. Lastly, make Avery work for the "virgin cookie". A little miffed he didn't know who she was and that they hadn't talked in awhile....so he needs to earn her (from Scandal).

They both need to work to be together. It takes two to make a relationship work so it should not be all on Avery to earn Dana if this is where the story is going.

It appears that Dana isn't as outgoing as Avery. We don't have much to go on because this chapter is based mostly on Avery and from his POV. I definitely would like to know what is going on in Dana's head and why they haven't seen each other in so long.

can't wait to see more from you about these two. Take your time and let them develop don't rush it.

Love the humor in it. Try longer chapters.

Wonderful beginning, please update soon

So awesome!! I like Avery and i like Dana!! More please!!

Not long enough and not really a cliff hanger either, hate when the writers on this site put such short chapters up. Please don't be like the many who don't update for months on end and then when you do its small like this. 3*

Thanks for all of the lovely feedback, guys! I'm glad you enjoyed the first chapter, and I'll be updating ASAP. I will also try to make the next chapter longer. Let's go, team Avery and Dana, haha.

You obviously didn't read the very end. Like I said, its the first chapter, and I didn't want to make it too long, considering I was just starting the story up. On the contrary, thanks for the feedback, anyway.

Realistic dialogue and scenario. Don't let the haters pull you down.

I think the beginning of the story is great and you should definitely continue :)

Can't wait for the next chapter!

Interesting story with a funny narrative...please continue

Adorable, sexy, cute....and most importantly, no spelling errors!!! Even DD is a grammar Nazi! WELL DONE!!

Reading the next installment now, awesome!