by Anschul
A 13-line sonnet? Or did you throw in the towel toward the end? Surely the dismal scene of NYC you paint couldn't have discouraged you that much. Or did it?
Ahhh, much better. That one small line makes such a difference; putting it back in makes it flow so much more smoothly. Tucks in the feeling so well.
The strong image at the end summerizes all the evocative snap shots you were presenting up to that point. Personally, I could not disagree more, but that's totally besides the point...