by kinky_little_kitten
......a five just for the effort you put into this and for the sentiment but it is very wordy and awkward in parts - if you're serious about writing poetry and are willing to make an effort I encourage you to keep writing but please read some too. Kudos.
but didn't quite read
you wrote, but didn't quite weed
you have an excellent ideas going, but you are burying
get rid of things like
when her mind and soul did break,
A way to chase the demons and fears,
etc.