All Comments on 'Peach'

for managing to keep it as 'erotic' rather than porn and, though it's nothing new to adopt the peach for this purpose, it's handled fairly neatly. nice to see the content emphasised by your use of sound.

Sound?

the sounds that lead the words:

Round plump pink

in the palm of your hand

Bring it close

Smell the clean sweet scent of summer

for example, the sound of 'round' is a rounded sound, emphasising the image of the peach b making it more concrete in our heads

the reps of the softened p's, the reps of the 'in's contained within pink/in/bring

the occurrences of the l's in each line, and the drawn-out 'eee's

this is carried over into the second stanza/strophe or whatever you call it, but not with the same craft imo. using language this way lends a cohesiveness to a write, and when done well is unobtrusive.

Suck succulent sugar sweet nectar ...would be a good example?

"So...

Suck succulent sugar sweet nectar ...would be a good example?"

the sibilance of the 's', the repeated low 'uh' from suck and succulent, the rep of the 'ah/er' sounds in sugar and nectar (depends on your accent)

these are examples, though personally i felt the 'suck succulent' a little heavy-handed and that whole line a bit too much of a mouthful when compared with the first strophe.

eating, enjoying and refreshing, TK U MLJ LV NV