All Comments on 'Ramblings About Familial Issues'

:) and thank you for sharing

maria

The metaphor in the first stanza felt forced and seemed out of place. The second stanza opened nicely, but the "heart sings" smacked of cliche', but then you played that "melancholy melody" and grabbed me back again. Combine that with some nice internal rhyme and the second stanza (with the exception of "heart sings") worked very well. The first stanza did use some similar "tools" but didn't feel as natural. I think perhaps the waterless ocean threw it off for me. You might think about either dropping it, or supporting it through the poem, or just consider me a lunatic... : )

Overall an interesting ramble.

jim : )