3 Crushes and a Wedding Ch. 02

Author's note: If you haven't read the first chapter of this series, you won't understand much of what is happening here, so go on, read that first, then come back. I'll be waiting.

Reminder: All of my stories leave something for the imagination. I don't want you to delve into a multi-chapter story expecting sex scenes in the traditional sense only to be disappointed. But if you appreciate the journey towards sex, with all its naughtiness and explicit moments, then I hope you'll enjoy the characters and their evolution here.

Disclaimer: Although not stated explicitly, all characters engaging in any sexual activity are above 18.

******

After a satisfying but solo pleasure session in the safety of my hotel bed, where my moment with Valentina evolved into a longer and more torrid fantasy, my night was restless and filled with intricate dreams of all three women -- languid kisses with Valentina, tender touches with Megan, and intense stares with Scarlett. The sun had barely come out when I gave up on sleeping and was up on my feet. It was still breezy so I went for a jog around the hotel's grounds. An hour of sprinting and sweating took a bit of the tension away and cleared my mind.

The one positive thing was that my Valentina story got its closure -- its sweet, delicious closure. I was proud of who I'd become, but I'd never really assumed my past or the role it played in shaping me. All of her positive words made me realize I shouldn't be ashamed of my origin story. It wasn't silly, it was just me, being true to myself, and living my adolescence to its fullest.

Then there was the hug and what followed. To have been kissed by her, to have kissed her, to tell my younger self that I held her as possessively as I'd always wanted, to write a happy epilogue to that saga, these were all an unexpected and unbelievable gift.

If I didn't get anything else out of the weekend, that was enough. But if I could push my luck and try to have a discussion with Scarlett to put an end to that miserable chapter, it'd be perfect.

And Megan, well, I still didn't know what to make of Megan. Like many years ago, the signals were everywhere but I couldn't tell you if I were reading too much into them or if they were real. Of the three, she's the only one I had never confessed my real feelings to and she hadn't made any concrete step to confirm or deny anything on her end. So Megan remained the biggest question mark.

Back to the hotel and in need of a massage, I was informed the morning sessions were fully booked so I had to make do with access to the sauna and jacuzzi. I went down to the spa, took off my running clothes, only keeping a bikini bottom on, wrapped a towel around myself, and headed to the sauna first.

It hadn't even occurred to me that I'd find one of my three crushes there that early, but the moment I opened the wooden door, I landed straight on Scarlett's piercing brown eyes. I stopped dead in my tracks and stood motionless by the door. Her penetrating, powerful gaze bore into my soul.

"May I?"

The corners of her lips nearly twisted in a smile. "Of course."

That nasal, melodic voice still tickled my senses, but I had to be stronger than before. Resist her understated charm and the pull she had on me. This was the woman responsible for my undoing many years ago and, despite her friendly exterior, vicious spikes could come out of her at any point.

I snickered and walked in, closing the door behind me.

"What is it?"

"I'm just surprised you're not afraid of being in the same tiny room with me." My tone dripped of saltiness.

"Oh please!" She scoffed.

I was taking two steps to the bench opposite hers but I had to turn quickly. "Please what, Scarlett? Jump your bones or don't make this kind of joke?"

She seemed surprised by my brash attitude. If she had dared answer with the first one, I wasn't certain I could control myself. For all the anger I carried in my heart toward her, there was an equal amount of unconsumed passion that was dying to burst out.

She shook her head, as if to dismiss whatever lurid thought had crossed her mind.

"Please," she insisted, "have a seat. There's room for both of us."

Tension momentarily curbed, I sat down on the bench and made sure the towel covered the parts of me that should be. As much as I wanted to flash her and see how well she'd react to womanly bits being openly displayed in front of her, I also needed her to think I wasn't interested and wouldn't throw myself at her like that. Dignity, I ought to have some.

I also had to keep the upper hand and steer the conversation as I saw fit.

"So here we are, catching up like you wanted. How do you want to play this?" She didn't react. I pushed further. "Do we sit in awkward silence and pray for the minutes to pass, do we chit-chat about nothing, or do we address the..." I glanced around the tiny sauna, "baby elephant in the room? Regular one wouldn't fit in here."

"Elephant," came the immediate reply.

That was some admirable courage. "Brave. The floor is yours."

She opened her mouth but no sound came out. She closed it, gulped, and tried again.

"...I don't know what to say..."

I snickered again and felt the sarcasm ooze out of my face along with the sauna-induced sweat. Now?! Now she didn't know what to say?!

"Don't look at me like that!" She half-pleaded, half-screamed.

"Like what?"

"Like you've already made up your mind, like you're not really ready to hear me out, like nothing I'll say will matter. I know I don't deserve forgiveness, but I'd like a fair trial at least."

"Fair enough." If what she was going to say merited attention, then I shall give it to her. I was nothing if not fair. I toned down my attitude and gestured for her to talk.

"I was saying, I don't know how to tell you I'm sorry." Huh, that was unexpected. "I'm ashamed of what I did and said the last time we spoke." She looked down at the floor. "There isn't a day that goes by where I don't force myself to forget what happened. I'm not proud of it and I wish it wasn't part of my life, but it is and I can't change that. I've worked on changing myself though... I don't want to repeat that mistake ever again."

Tears welled up in my eyes. I'd waited years to hear those words, to know she regretted the way she'd treated me.

"You broke me." I whispered, my voice breaking as well.

Our eyes bore into each other, hers puffier and redder than mine. Scarlett was tearing up in front of me. I didn't think I'd live to see the day. She batted her eyelashes and one drop got pushed out. It slowly fell to her cheeks.

"It took me years, years to get back my confidence, to start caring about anything else again, to allow myself to love again."

"Sorry," she mumbled. A second tear was streaming down her other cheek.

"You're the first person I told I was attracted to women. You know how much courage that took? Things weren't what they are now. And you know how many times I relived that scene, how many times I played back all the ugly slurs you said to me, how many times I wished I could go back into my tidy, calm closet because I was afraid the whole world would react like you did?"

I had waited a long time to say that aloud. I felt anger, relief, and a little satisfaction to see my words hurting her. Maybe not as much as she'd hurt me, but it was a start. And I hadn't even said it all.

"You know how many times I doubted I was mistaken about us, about my feelings, how I prayed I was wrong about you and about me, how I wished I was just straight so I wouldn't ever be hurt like that again?"

It wasn't just that, I was bitter about a lot more and I wasn't going to let the opportunity to vent slide.

"And you didn't just destroy me emotionally, you also destroyed my work passion. You had believed in me, you had promised me the world. That business partnership with you, that opportunity you offered me to get started on my career even before graduating? It was everything I ever wanted, a proof that I was good, really, really good at my job. And I wanted nothing but to flap my wings and fly for you, and with you. One talk," I raised my index and repeated, "one talk, five minutes, that's all it took for you to disappear and take your promise and my dream with you. After that, I lost my drive and my will to work. I just wanted to finish my internship and never see the inside of an engineering lab again. It took years for me to find my way back and, every damned moment, I wished I'd kept my mouth shut. I kept thinking that maybe, just maybe, if I hadn't told you how I really felt, I would've never had you, but I could've at least had my dream."

She looked up at the ceiling -- anything to avoid eye contact with me. Tears and sweat now mixed on her cheeks. "I was an idiot." Her words barely went above a whisper.

The heat of the sauna and the power of that discussion had sucked the energy out of the room. We sat in silence. There was so much more I wanted to say, but I felt depleted, of both words and feelings. I looked down at my trembling hands. She was still fixated on the ceiling.

"You weren't wrong about us." Her voice sounded even more nasal than usual.

Well, that was another surprising admission. She lowered her eyes, I raised mine. Vulnerability and indecision fought for dominance on her face. She took a deep breath and continued.

"I felt we had something different. I knew we were flirting, not just you, but me as well. Couldn't stop it." She smiled weakly. "I noticed the way you looked at me wasn't all that innocent, and I suspected the way I looked at you wasn't innocent either. But it was all under the table for me, something to be enjoyed from afar, but not to be addressed directly or spoken of."

I tried to process her words. So it wasn't all in my head after all? She looked to the side, paused for a while, then continued.

"I thought we had a silent agreement of sorts to let things stay like that. So when you came on to me and said it out loud, I was taken by surprise. I wasn't ready to hear that or accept it. And my only reaction was to deny, deny, deny, and fight it... and fight you." She shook her head, clearly disappointed with herself. "I couldn't go back and see you again, and I certainly couldn't risk working with you. Deep down, I know I was afraid. I wouldn't have resisted you if I were near you, so I did the only thing I knew would work: I made it my life's mission to avoid seeing you again." She took a long breath and sighed it out. "That doesn't justify what I said or did to you then, I shouldn't have dumped my insecurities on you, but it's my perspective of what happened."

"Sounds like you were homophobic against yourself, perhaps more than against me."

It was easier to let go of my rage now that I knew she'd probably hurt herself more than she hurt me.

"Maybe, yeah. I used to think I was tolerant, maybe even accepting of the LGBT community, but it never occurred to me that I may be part of it." She sighed again and paused. This conversation was obviously talking its toll on her and I wondered if this was the first time she had ever discussed those things with someone else. "Hearing you say out loud that there was something between us disjointed me back then. Even now, all these years later, I don't know how to explain it. I'm forty-two, married with two children," she averted her eyes, "and by now, I know I'm mostly straight... except for you."

"So I'm an asterisk to your straightness?" I joked to lighten the mood of the stuffy sauna room, even though the knowledge that she was married pinched my heart.

She chortled. We looked at each other for a few seconds, her red eyes still able to zoom through me, reach my core, and wrangle me from the inside. I felt the pull of her stare, stronger than all those years ago, more raw, more mature, more impetuous. If there was ever any doubt in my mind that she still felt something for me, it was now gone. She obviously did.

"Thanks. For saying all of that. Feels good... The bittersweet kind of good, but still good."

I was sincere. This early morning sauna session had paid its dividends. I had gotten rid of lots of sweat and even more emotional baggage.

She smiled imperceptibly. "Should've said it a long time ago. Better late than never, as they say."

A drop of sweat reached my eyebrow and fell onto my cheek, clearly signaling that I had been in the sauna for too long. I swiped it with my hand and dabbed it on the towel.

"I should get out before I lose all the water in my body."

"Oh, right, me too."

I was standing up when I caught the sight of her towel loosen as she moved, and reveal the top of her chest. A creamy white globe bounced out, my mouth went dry, and I instantly turned away to give her some privacy... although I did notice her lift a questioning eyebrow.

"I'll see you around." I quickly moved toward the door and was about to dash out when she called.

"Wait!"

She took a step toward me while firmly holding her towel in place. I still had trouble finding my saliva.

"I want to hug you, but I'm afraid this thing," she tapped the towel, "will undo itself completely and you'll think I can't keep my clothes on around you."

I gulped. A hug with benefits wouldn't be all that bad, would it? She looked at me with her dark eyes, pleading, indecisive. I couldn't leave her hanging like that.

I took a step toward her and wrapped my arms around her, praying that our towels would hold. There was no telling what would happen if they didn't. Amidst the humidity of the room, a whiff of jasmine tickled my senses as her body merged with me.

She rested her face against mine and felt so vulnerable in my embrace. A slight tremble shook her when my hand touched her naked shoulder. It occurred to me that I'd never hugged her before this weekend, not once during the two years we were at her sister's company. We had brushed fingers and touched hands, but nothing more intimate than that. This destination wedding was breaking a lot of ground.

"Thanks," she whispered against my ear. "As I said earlier, I don't deserve forgiveness but thanks for listening." She tenderly kissed my cheek, leaving a soft and warm reminder of her presence, then quickly pushed herself away and left.

I remained in place for a few seconds, unsure of what'd happened, then shook myself and walked out. I put on my bikini top and headed to the jacuzzi. I was both hoping and terrified I'd find her in the spa's changing room but it was empty. So were the hallways and the hot tub room when I finally got to it.

I lowered myself in the hot water, turned the motor on, and closed my eyes. After the heat of the sauna and everything that happened the previous night and that morning, the bubbly water felt divine.

Ambient music, the kind you only hear in wannabe Asian spas, punctuated the silence. The warm and fresh smell of lavender and patchouli enveloped me. A few minutes elapsed and I was starting to picture my troubles drifting away on a wavy sea. Valentina, Megan, Scarlett, they were all a distant vision, and I was floating, lighter than I'd ever been my entire teenage and adult life.

Then I was suddenly aware of a presence in the room. I pulled my eyelids apart and saw Scarlett there, standing by the edge of the tub, pinching her lower lip, looking at me, arms at the hem of her towel.

My eyes flew all over the room, looking for any cameras in the ceiling or walls. Finding none, they fixed her fingers and tried to will them to separate the fabric from her body. Whether it's by telepathy or sorcery, she untied the towel and let it fall to the floor.

"Oops, looks like I really can't keep my clothes on around you," she said cheekily and laughed her signature melodic laugh. It resonated across the room, contrasting with the zen tunes playing on loop.

It'd been way too long since I heard that enchanting sound, but my brain was focused elsewhere, on her quasi-naked frame standing in front of me. Only a thin bikini bottom covered her and the rest, well, the rest was now being feasted on by my hungry eyes. I saved the imagery to my brain and knew I'd be using it a lot in my future pleasure sessions.

"May I?" she looked at me then the water, feigning innocence.

"Sure." If only she knew how sure I was.

She lowered herself to the other side of the tub and snickered. "I'm surprised you're not afraid of being in the same jacuzzi with me."

I was about to formulate a snippy answer when a light bulb went on in my head. This was exactly how our conversation in the sauna had started. Only one way to find out if she was replaying that quirky intro.

"Oh please," I wasn't sure if I sounded cheeky or if I was pleading her to join me.

"Please what, Zoe?" She smiled, "Cum onto you here or stop making this kind of joke?"

She'd definitely pronounced it cum, not come. Definitely... I think. I gulped.

"Please, have a seat. There's enough room for both of us."

She laughed again and dropped into the water facing me. She resurfaced, wet face, wet hair, wet shoulders. A long sigh came out of her lips. Her naked breasts were out of sight, hidden by the water bubbles, but not out of mind. She adjusted herself on the edge opposite mine and brushed my foot in the process. I expected her to move it away but she didn't, instead bending her leg so her toes were on my calf.

"Feels good, doesn't it?"

I gulped again. The hot bubbly water? Yes. The nearly naked woman rubbing her foot on my leg? Oh hell yes. The wetness spreading inside me, anxious for a release? You bet.

"Uh-hum," was all I could squeeze out.

"Cat ate your tongue?" She raised one eyebrow playfully.

"More like a pussy."

Her eyes widened and I smirked, proud of my comeback.

Slowly, she walked her toes on the outer side of my calf. Goosebumps spread through my skin, reaching all the way up to my thigh.

"Remember that meeting room table we used to gather around for the weekly briefing?"

"Yes."

Her foot climbed on top of my leg and fell toward the middle, between my two thighs. I gasped, she smiled.

"I was thinking of what would've happened if I sat next to you and our hands brushed by mistake. Or if I sat facing you and our feet bumped secretly."

Her pupils were dilated and barely distinguishable from the dark of her eyes. Her small face looked even tinier now that her hair was taking up less volume and that her eyes were prominently shining.

I remembered how the first few times I'd seen her, I mistook her for her sister. The two looked so similar I thought they were the same person until I saw them next to each other. The differences became noticeable after that, then they were so obvious to me, I couldn't understand how I'd confused them in the first place. Scarlett had a smaller, kinder face, with smiley eyes, fuller cheeks, and thin but naturally dark red lips.

Not much had changed over the years, just a few new wrinkles at the corner of her eyes. She still had that ordinary vibe about her that captivated me. She wasn't a born seductress with curves in all the right places and sexy manners like Valentina, nor was she angelically gorgeous like Megan. She was very average, but it was that normalcy that attracted me to her. Well, that and the fact that she could drill into my soul with just a stare.

I flinched, thinking of what could've been, had we touched at any point in time before I admitted my feelings to her. Would she have reconsidered or softened if the physical attraction between us had been undeniable? Would she have let me grab her hand, graze her arm, brush her lips, and maybe kiss her? Would it have been so bad if I'd went with my primal instincts around her and let my body do the talking? And would the outcome be any different if I'd used my tongue in other ways than just for speaking?