A Blinding Love

You guys think you got a problem, well picture this, a small round balloon glued to a much larger round balloon with four of those long balloons that clowns blow up to make balloon sculptures at children's parties hanging off the big balloon. On the front two large balloons, same size as the top balloon, glued on. That's me. I'm five foot seven inches, pale white, black hair and 250 lbs. Obese is a word. No one wants to spend any time with someone so fat, which leads to anxiety and depression, which causes my eating disorder which makes me so fat.

It's not like I got a lot of control over it, it's just a condition I've had. I've been to counsellors and psychologists, joined weight loss organizations and a lot of other shit and it just doesn't take. Who wants to be near a fat woman? All I've had from these people is "it's your fault you're so fucking fat." They don't say it like that, but they all say it. Then one day it changed for me.

I catch the same subway car at the same time, from the same station to go to the same building in the city to do the same legal secretary job I had been doing since high school, all with the same people on it, day after day. I know, boring but it's safe and keeps me fed and housed. A few months after I started that job, a girl got onto my subway car two stops from me, got off the same stop and walked to the same building I did. She was a larger girl, nowhere near my size but large, taller than me, African American, pretty and blind. I watched her and she never faltered in a step. Everyone on the subway car got to know Grace and we got a bit protective of her actually. She always sat in the same place and if a casual rider got on and went to sit there, they would be asked, politely, to sit somewhere else. Only one ever objected, but backed off when she was told that seat was always saved for the blind girl at the next stop. Seems even the worst Karens are not going to disrespect a blind person.

I would follow Grace, not stalking her, but we were going to the same building. We sometimes caught the same lift, she worked on the seventh floor and I was on the fourteenth. At the start of 2020, just before the virus hit us, I was almost alongside her, walking past a construction site. The cold wind was gusty but not too bad when it surged, we both curled up to it and pushed on. Suddenly, there was a weird grinding noise and a loud ping, I looked up and the crane that had lifted a load was struggling against the wind. The load had shifted and hit something, it began to fall. Grace was oblivious so I screamed out "Down!" and she froze. She was really confused so I grabbed her and pulled her to the ground. She wasn't going to remain standing with my weight pulling her down.

There was this huge crash and Grace screamed, I thought she might have lashed out but in that moment we were hit by a shower of debris. We both screamed. I felt this huge whack on my right ass cheek just as we were smothered by this cloud of dust. It didn't cover us for long, the gusting winds blew it away quickly but that didn't stop us from coughing our lungs up. Everyone around us was in the same position, we were surrounded by people struggling to stand, to breath. I had my right arm around Grace and my left was under her. I flexed my hands to see if they were still working and Grace said, "I hope you're the woman who told me to get down!" Then I realized I had a handful of her breast.

"Oh shit! I'm sorry, I was checking to see if things were still working."

"Oh, my tits are fine, thank you," she said in a deadpan, straight faced manner, "But I would prefer to get to know you better first."

I helped her sit up. It was cold and windy, there hadn't been any rain or snow for the last four days, so while covered in dust and debris, we were, at least, dry. "I'm sorry, here, let me help you clean up a bit."

"What the fuck happened?" she asked. I told her her and we could hear sirens coming from all directions. She coughed and I asked her if she was okay. She said "Yeah, just a mouthful of dust coming out of my lungs. You?"

"Apart from a sore ass, I'm fine."

"Well, tell your guy not to be so hard on your ass," she deadpanned.

"No boyfriend, I got hit by something on a cheek."

"Oh, I can rub it better for you if you like. No boyfriend, you're very pretty, so why no boyfriend?"

"I'm not that pretty, and I'm not interested."

She stopped at that, "Can I touch your face?" She asked, "I can't see you, so touch is the only way I can feel what you look like. I don't normally ask anyone for this, but given our circumstances."

I know this is something of a trope, and it's something the blind really don't do with just anyone. Usually only for very few people, close relatives or friends, so I said, "Sure. if you like."

"Thank you." I took her hand and put it on the side of my dust covered face, it was strange, that's for sure, as she felt all over it. "Besides, I'd like to know what the woman who saved my life looks like." She touched me for a short while and said, "Very pretty indeed."

I said nothing, but I must admit, I squirmed a bit. We were just covered in dust and she was now a gray color, dammit concrete dust. That means lime in our lungs. Fuck! That's why we were coughing. It'll probably be nothing but it will also mean a lot of medical time off work getting checked out. "We'll have to stay here," I said, "Police and medical will want to talk to us. We're covered in concrete dust."

"No point talking to me," Grace said, "I didn't see anything." With a perfectly straight face, deadpan delivery, I couldn't help but laugh. "Nice laugh too," she said, "But who are you?"

"Me?" I hadn't told her my name then, "I'm Jill, I'm on the same subway car as you and work in the same building."

"And you've never talked to me before?"

"No, never had the need,"

"What? I had to be covered in dust before you'd talk to me?" In that same deadpan delivery.

"No," and I have no idea what came over me, "I just needed an excuse to touch your tits."

She laughed, "Damn, you really didn't need a falling building to introduce yourself."

"No, I know, but people don't want to get too close to the fat kid."

"Ahh fuck 'em." She said, "I gotta get to work, I got something important going on and have to be there. Can you see my cane?"

I looked around and saw it, it was a fold up cane with a really odd bend in the middle. "It's seriously flat and bent, I'm afraid."

"Ahh sheet, this day is getting better."

"Look, I can help you to your office, if you don't mind." I said as I picked up the cane, folded it as best I could, giving them to her. "I can fix it so at least you can use it for the day too if you like. But it won't last."

"Nah, it's ruined," she said, running her hands over it, "Thanks anyway. Yeah, I'd really appreciate your help, thank you."

"It's no problem. Glad to do it."

I moved towards her and took her elbow. "It's better if I take your wrist," she said, sliding her hand onto my wrist. "It's easier for me to feel when you move and change direction."

I nodded, "Wow, never been someone's guide dog before," I laughed.

"How about being my kitty?" She was outrageously flirting with me!

"I gotta tell you, I love patting kitties." Trying to keep that same deadpan delivery.

She laughed, "And I have a kitty that loves being patted." We just about fell over ourselves with that one. Later, I thought it was the relief of surviving something dangerous that led to this exchange, dismissing it as being a release of hysteria.

"Well, come on, we don't have far to go," she said so we trooped off, me guiding her around the debris on the ground and toward our building that had a crowd gathering out front. On the way there she asked me if I could come down to her office for lunch. She would like to thank me for helping her.

I said, "Sure, but how are you going to get home?"

"Mmm haven't thought that far ahead, yet. Something will crop up I'm sure." she said.

I took her through the crowd and into the elevator, got out on the seventh, and took her into her office. People crowded us a bit but Grace introduced me as her friend and saviour. Obviously people were impressed, making suitable noises. I got a glimpse of myself in a reflection so I started making excuses to go and clean up. Grace said, "Oh, I'm sorry Jill, you probably look as big a mess as me, come on, I'll show you the bathroom and we can clean up a bit."

We did and at last, I said my goodbyes, see you at lunch and left Grace in her office. I got to work late, obviously, but one look at my coat, my hastily cleaned up clothing made any negative comment redundant. The dust in my hair was not going to be removed without a good washing, but at least I was a lot tidier than I had been. I was asked for details and when the topic faded, got on with my work. My boss asked if I would like to go home and clean up, take the rest of the day off. I said, maybe, but after lunch, I'll let her know.

At lunch I went down to Grace's office and we took the lift to the lobby where there is a popular cafe in the back entrance of the building. We talked a bit and I told her of the offer my boss made, and she said, "Well, I've done what I needed to do today, so if you like would you do me the favor of helping me get home?"

"What, now?"

"Well, this afternoon anyway. But now would be okay, if that was alright with you, and your boss."

I didn't even think about it, saying yes straight away. I called the office, spoke to my boss and was told someone would cover for me, see you tomorrow. I had my bag and coat so didn't have to go back upstairs for anything.

I actually enjoyed her company and about ten minutes later, we were walking out of the building, on our way to her place. Our normal route to the subway was blocked, so I navigated around another way, made it to the station, caught the rail car and got off at her stop.

She navigated but I helped her to her apartment where she invited me in. She lives in a fifth floor, two room apartment, sparsely furnished, a TV in one corner, for sound and music, she said. She made me coffee, then said, "I couldn't help but notice you're limping."

"Yeah, whatever hit me in the ass is hurting."

"Ah, you should have said something."

"I'll be okay."

"With me you will, I'm a fully qualified masseuse. I do a bit of rehab stuff for disabled kids. So come on, come and lie down on my bed and I can check you out." I started to refuse, but she wouldn't hear of it.

She is hard to deny. I went along with it. I lay down and she felt around my back and ass. "Nah, you're going to have to take your dress off." She must have felt my hesitation, "It's not like I can watch you undress, so please, take your dress and panties off."

I said, "Do you always get girls naked on first dates?"

"Only the special ones, the ones who save my life."

"Oh I did nothing of the sort."

"You did, you know." There was something serious in her voice, "I know you likely didn't hear it, but there was a missile that passed right through the spot I was walking in, I heard it. It was not small and it would have likely hit me in the chest, so don't think what you did was nothing. I know it wasn't. I might be blind but I can hear really well." That pulled me up. "Come on, get your clothes off so I can have a good feel of you- erm, no, that didn't sound quite right."

There it was again, that same deadpan, dry humor. I laughed, thinking back to our flirting before and took my dress off then dropped my panties and panty-hose.

I lay on the bed and felt Grace's hands touching my back, working their way down, towards my ass. Her fingers were gentle, they obviously knew what they were doing as she was narrating what was happening all the way. She was telling me about how my muscles were not developed well, were tightening up, were thinning out. She got to my ass and felt across the folds and ripples of too much cellulite. She said nothing about that, then I was hit with a real pain in the ass. "Yep, that's it," she said, "Damn, you should have said something earlier. That's gotta hurt babe." Babe? She's calling me babe? Well it was sore, but it wasn't really hurting, until I started walking to the subway and then when walking her home. "This is gunna hurt a bit more, but then it will get better."

She plunged her fingers right into it and I just about jumped through the roof.

"FUCK!" I cried, "THAT HURTS!"

"Yep, said it would, but it won't in a minute or two. That's a hell of bruise already. It'll be down your leg tomorrow, unless I work it out now. Be right back."

She returned from the bathroom and I heard the flip of a plastic lid. "This is Voltaren gel, it will help reduce the swelling." I felt the coolness of the gel as Grace gently spread it around the sore area. Soon, she went off the bruise itself and worked her way down my leg. "You're going to have to spread them, Jill. I want to get right in there."

I didn't hesitate, because this was this first time in a long long time someone was touching me in a positive way. Then I registered what she had said, I really wanted her to get right in there too. She manipulated the muscles, worked through the fat, pushed deep into my right leg. She started back up as she reached the back of the knee and worked around the inner and outer thigh, up over the ass, across the bruise, more pain, but not as intense, then up to the hips, along the spine. I got to admit, it hurt like shit, but it was feeling a good hurt, painful, yes, but a relieving pain. Grace worked magic on me. She stopped and I heard her hands wiping on a towel, felt the soft material on my legs. I heard something and her hands rubbing together. She started again, only this time, a lot more tenderly with oily hands.

At some point the massage changed again. I didn't feel it, it went from being a painful thing to being a gentle, then sensual thing and I have no idea when that happened. I could feel her hands working my left leg, then on the inside. Without considering the consequences, I felt her working up the thighs and when she felt like she was going to stop and start somewhere else, I said, "No, keep going, please, keep going up!" My voice was husky from the excitement she was giving me.

"You sure?"

"Yes, please, touch me!" As it to emphasize it, I spread my legs further, opening myself to her hands.

I felt her touching my vagina, her fingers rolling down and up along the labia, I gasped at her actions. She felt for the clit and caressed it, running her fingers along my pussy and then rammed them into my vaginal canal. "Yes! Do it!" I cried and her incredible touch just excited me so much. I felt like I was flooding in the pleasure she was giving me. I had a sexual relationship with a girl in secretarial school but had very few lovers since. This was just wonderful, what Grace was doing to me and it wasn't long before I could feel my body telling me that I was going to cum. I did! I cum! I usually do with my own fingers and my vibrator, but this is the first time in a long time someone else was making me cum! I moaned and groaned and ooohhed and aaahhhed then felt all my muscles snap as it swept over me.

I fell like a big pile of fat onto the bed, and Grace stopped caressing my labia and clit. "How did you know?" I asked her.

She bent down, over me, felt for my face kissed my cheek and said, "You've been telling me how lonely you've been."

"What? I haven't said a word about being lonely."

"No you haven't but your voice, your movement, all say it. You just gotta learn to listen for it."

That's a little creepy, I thought. "And you guessed?"

"Wasn't much guess work involved, especially after I've been holding your wrist. I could feel your heart beat faster when I touched you." She kissed my cheek, "Least I could do for you, babe."

I struggled a little to sit up but got there. I stood up without difficulty and stepped to her. I wrapped my arms around her and kissed her, on the lips. "I've never had anyone so fucking beautiful even want to be close to me before." She hugged me back and returned my kiss. "Can I repay your favor?" I asked.

I began to undress her, and quickly realized that there wasn't a lot of fat on her, she was well muscled, large framed, with luscious tits and when I got her naked, I touched her all over, before laying her on the bed. I used my fingers on her body, then her clit, burying two fingers inside her. I leaned over her and licked her clit, breathing her heady aroma into my nostrils, filling my lungs with this woman on heat. I licked her up and down, using both my lips and tongue to do the licking. I kept fingers inside her, gently pumping in and out, my tongue and lips assaulting her clit. I kept this up for a while then she started pumping my mouth. She gasped and moaned an orgasm, powerful and loud. She shook as she came, ordering me to fuck her again. I was happy to oblige.

That was nearly four years ago now. Since then we've had Covid-19, lock downs, a presidential election, a phoney, hurt little boy demonstrating how petulance looks in the rich. The events of the last four years have shaken us, but Grace and I, we're living together. She encouraged me to get into her gym and I did, just to please her. We worked hard when the gyms were closed, together. It's fun doing nude yoga with Grace. I've dropped a hundred pounds, lots of dress sizes, look and feel great and in love with the most wonderful person in the world.

I told my parents we intended to get married last week and I'm sure they would rather me fat and unhappy than married to a woman. They haven't said it, but like Grace does, I felt it in their looks, their body language, their spoken tones. You know - I don't care. I solved my problems and am loved and you know the best part: even if I hadn't joined Grace's gym, she would have loved me anyway.

So the moral of the story, everyone can be loved, everyone can be a better person when they are loved properly, when they learn to love, to give back. So be generous, and that's what I have become since meeting and falling in love with Grace.

She tells me I give her lots of love, in tiny ways, in kindness, in big things, the way I hold her, how I help her do things without taking over. I keep telling her I am a mirror to her, giving back what I get. I don't tell her I'm being selfish too, keeping the best bits I get from her to myself. She makes me want to be a better person. My life is so much better when I have someone who loves me for me, someone who doesn't judge me, in it.