All Comments on 'A Different Love Story Pt. 02'

by Lostinmich

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PennLadyPennLadyabout 15 years ago
Not bad

I do like this, but I think it needs a little work and/or editing. First thing, guys don't "giggle" so much. Chuckle, perhaps, or snort, or stifle a laugh, but giggling just brings the wrong picture to mind for the situations you outline. There are other things, too, like punctuation and verb tense or verb/noun (at one point you wrote "Steve said with a laughED," when obviously you meant "laugh," for example). I am curious to see how Candy's case against John's company affects things, though. Please keep going!

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