All Comments on 'A Lesson Learned'

Very weak storyline.

Fair writing in service of very little story...<p>and what the HELL is it with this cutsie "Quote: Life goes on" crap at the end of EVERY SINGLE STORY? It is SO artsy-fartsy, so precious, so pretentious, it detracts from what might otherwise have been a good story. Sorta like ending with, "and they lived happily ever after." Uh, except worse.<p>Decent writing, weak story, shitty cliché at the end. Sums it up about right.

Normally I don't post comments following my own stories, but this time I will make an exception. This is directed at Anonymous in Tampa, Fl. and Anonymous in USA chi town.

First thanks for the comment. I can't and don't expect everyone to like my stories or my writing. I write for the enjoyment and then share with others. If the others like or dislike my demented ravings it's all good because I have pleased my target audience, ME.

Second, this story is base on a true incident. I was closely involved in that incident. If it's a weak story as suggested it's my writing that's weak. There is nothing weak about the tragedy of three people having their lives ruined. I'm sorry I couldn't make you both understand what a horrible thing happened outside that restaurant that evening.

The "Quote Life goes on" is a tribute to the writer that inspired me to begin writing. Maybe you should shoot him, because without his stories I would have never started to write my own.

The quote simply means that the life of the characters in my stories doesn't stop at the end of my writing. The continue on, at least in my imagination and in some of the readers minds also. It also means that life goes on for all of us no matter what the outcome of my stories.

The quote is again a tribute to maybe the best writer that has ever been on this site. He doesn't post here anymore because of the anonymous Andys and hate Nazis. It's a great loss for the rest of the readers.

Finally, thanks for reading the story. If if you didn't like it or my other works, I still appreciate you interest and you taking the time to post comments.

By the way, I had to give my story top marks, because I liked it. LOL

I enjoyed the story but I can see some of what the commentors below are saying. It did not have a dramatic build up like some of your stories. Certainly, as a news story it is great, but in a fictional category, more build up would have turned this into a great story.

I liked the story and appreciated that it was something a little different than we are used to.

Please try to ignore those critics that are trying to claim their proverbial 15 minutes at your expense. They are truly inconsequential.

It could have been better...

life doesnt make it real or good. Most people most of the time will chose the worst possible course of action because people are basically stupid. Given fifteen possible choices of actions to take, most people will take the one that has the worst possible outcomes. Add to that that some men think with their little heads some women think only with their cunts and couldnt tell right from wrong if they had to. Whether I like your story or not doesnt really matter to you as you said. But believe me when I say keep on writing. You cant make all of the people happy all of them time but you do have a chance to make some of the people happy sometime. And remember if the troops arent complaining something is wrong.

He knew they were married , he didnt care , he needs to DIE .

On the he needs to die

Thanks for sharing.

Great advice also. A punk turned into a great guy. Doesn't happen too often. Especially in real life.

HA

Excellent plot and very good concise writing.

Very well done!

I used to not cull any one, married or not. I have been involved with a lovely woman since 1998, we have had our ups and downs but right now we are up again. I was just trying to remember the last married woman I was with, I think it was 1990. She asked me so I probably would not have been with her if she had not asked. In the decades prior to that I had been with quite a few married women but in the interval between 1990 and 1998 I don't remember any. Of course, I still flirt with anyone that is upright and breathing, flirting is still OK in my book.

I liked your story a lot. Bf

Unlike others earlier, I really liked it. Thanks and, as DF says, "Life goes on". Great writer and great quote.

This sounds like some reminiscing of an old man, but it doesn't really feel like a story. Too bad, because I would've loved if this had been a real story properly fleshed out.

There's an old saying from the days of the cowboys: The Arizona desert is full of cactus, but you don't have to sit on every one of them to get the point.

A quot by someone few know is relevant here "As regards plots I find real life no help at all. Real life seems to have no plots." As a cautionary tale,this is well written, and perhaps cathartic to the writer. As entertainment, and legitimately that may not have been it's purpose, it is told by the secondary character whose principle emotion to the horror is that "there but the grace of god go I." However while he is somewhat casually involved in the tragedy, told from the woman's point of view, it would be gripping.

I'm rereading and enjoying your writing

Chilley

thanks for the offering.

Be careful. Don't get caught. Once a pussy hound, always a pussy hound. That little episode would have done nothing to slow him down except make him a little more careful. A true store? Don't make me laugh. This is a porn site. NO ONE believes a word coming out of your mouth.

He was a serial seducer and bragged about it.

Story needs second chapter where he gets paid back when guy seduces his wife

Fairly certain you are writing about wanderer aka denham forrest. If his actual reason for not posting stories is the one you wrote that is a shame

Under both names, he was special.

I would point out numerous comments by those with names have been viscious also.

I realize also that creative people who share work with public, either grow a thick skin or end up in counseling.

You can't please everyone. Terrible to punish hundreds of fans with thousands of complimentary words just because one couldn't ignore a few idiots!

Nice that he.lived to get scared straight. Too many aren't that lucky.

Guys might read this and say to themselves "yeah, but I'll never get caught". Woman might think to themselves "what did I see in that guy?" But I doubt very seriously that anyone changes their behavior after reading this little ditty. The "true story" bit felt wrong. I think you write fairly well. But nothing in the writing or in your comments convinced me that this was, in any way, a true story. Sorry. Could it happen? In today's society where nearly everyone has a gun and seems to think nothing about shooting anyone, for any reason? Yeah, it could happen. But you could get hit by lightning too.

Good story

Again, good for a man who learns his lessons.

well written and truely very real sounding. good advice

I am literally listening to "Bad to the Bone" while reading this and typing my comments. It's always good to learn from life little lesson.

People get hit by lightning in real life too jackass

Good story. I get the lesson, but she was divorced when he went after her. Still, stay away from folks with crazy exes is definitely good advice, regardless of their actual status. 5*

took 2 lessons but he did finally LEARN. actually lucky to be alive

Liked the story and get the point.

Pretty well done👍