A Life Less Ordinary

I feel like I'm slipping away, that I'm being absorbed by a black fog I can't escape. I'm losing sight of who I am and where my life is. I'm a carer to my ailing mum, who is dying. I'm a full time, essentially single parent to my children. Part time wife to my long-suffering husband and trying to hold down a job. There is no time for me. I am under the constant watchful eyes of my mum and daughter.

My husband and I are separated by 10,000 miles. My and my children's lives have been disrupted beyond recognition. I feel angry and bitter and sad, all rolled into one. And horny. I feel horny a lot of the time. For no reason at all that I can fathom.

Australia shut its borders to the world 18 months ago, at the same time my mum was diagnosed with terminal cancer in England. We have lived in Australia for the last eight years and we got out when we could; but there is no end in sight to when we might be able to return and when I'll get to see my hubby, Aven, again. It's hard. Much harder than I anticipated.

Aven's solution was to buy me shares in a sex toy shop, I mean sex toys, but enough of them that it feels like I'm a shareholder...! Our relationship before I left was better than it has ever been. Passionate, urgent, exciting, new. I have never been more in love with him.

Before I left we'd starting watching a bit of porn together, Aven's choice. He has a fetish for fisting, who knew?! I mean I knew he liked doing it to me, but the extent of how much he loves it has only just become apparent. And don't get me wrong, I love him doing it. It got to the point where I could only cum if he was fisting me, fingering my ass and me pushing down on my clit with a wand.

We've been sending each other links from a popular porn site, showing what we'd like to do to each other. I find myself becoming drawn into a rabbit hole of depravity. He's taken on the role of master, and I am his willing, obedient slave. His fetish is gaping and watching me get fucked in every hole by other men. And I want to please him. Our depravity is growing together.

"I own you and you will do whatever I command!" Aven stated this almost out of nowhere one night on the phone. "I own your fucking wet pussy and tight ass and when I see you again I'm going to force my hard, veiny cock in your tight ass while fisting your slopping wet pussy."

Instantly I feel my clit start to throb and my pussy is wet. I feel like I could fuck him right now. I need to be fucked. He tells me there is a delivery on its way to me and I'll get in the morning. I don't know what to expect. I just know that from the porn we've been watching that a 'vanilla' fuck isn't going to cut it anymore.

My toys arrive, just as he said they would, the next day. I'm desperate to get them home and see what he's ordered me. Getting them into the house is a challenge, beady eyes watching my every move. I manage to sneak them in and it's like Christmas and my birthday all rolled into one!

But, oh my goodness! I have a double dildo for ass and pussy, a wand to stimulate my throbbing clit, an anal plug, a three in one vibrator for clit, pussy and ass, a vibrating egg, Kegel balls and oh my -- anal beads! I am so excited by this!

Straight away I insert the Kegle balls; my pussy is so wet already. It doesn't really feel like much, and I feel a little disappointed. I've never really been into toys before, so this is all super exciting! But wow! After having the balls in for not very long at all, my knickers are soaking wet. I'm hornier than I expected, and I just want to try all my toys!

I lube up my ass, this lube is amazing. It's thick and creamy and not sticky in the slightest. My ass is sufficiently lubricated. The anal beads slide right in. I'm a little tight, I don't know what to expect, but they feel good. In my mind I'd just try a few -- I'm pretty much an ass virgin. But I find myself slipping more and more of the silicon beads up. I'm surprised when all 10inches are in my ass! But pleased - my master will be proud and happy. He wants me to 'train' -- to stretch my pussy and ass so that when I see him again, he can easily fist both holes at the same time. This makes me more horny than I care to admit.

So the Kegel balls are in my pussy, which is absolutely dripping and the beads are in my ass. I get the wand on my clit -- it's on the third setting which is pretty fast and I'm pushing pretty hard. With my other hand I start to slowly pull the anal beads out. My God! It feels amazing and as soon as the are all out, I cum! This is a first for me -- I have never made myself climax. In fact, until this last year with Aven, I'm not sure I ever had. My body feels warm as the release takes over. It starts in my clit and spreads throughout, and I feel like I'm having an out of body experience. My legs are shaking involuntary. I feel like all the stress and anxiety has left my body in a puff of ecstasy.

I can't wait to tell my master all about it, but on some level I know it won't be enough for him. He's demanding and the intensity of our conversations has amplified.

"Tell me what you want me to do to you, you slutty whore," he asked. And at that moment in time, I want him to do it all. I want his fist in my pussy while he's fucking my ass and someone else's cock is making me choke. We've spoke about going to a swinger's club, and I love the idea, I just don't see myself the way he does. So I tell him what I want.

"I want you fisting me and fucking my ass. I want you sharing me. You and another guy lift me and put me in the swing so that you can DP me -- one massive cock in my dripping wet pussy, and one in my tight ass. While a girl is sucking my erect nipples you guide her hand to my pussy and she starts to fist me at the same time. The sensations are unbelievable and you sense a change in my pussy and pull out -- not yet, you say.

You take me down from the swing and place me on the bed on all fours. You beckon for some guys who are watching to come over. You've lubed me up and pull my bum cheeks apart. You slowly push your hard, fat cock in my ass, as another starts to fuck my pussy. It feels amazing. I can feel the both of them almost rubbing up against each other, separated only by a thin layer of skin. And then I feel my ass being stretched further -- another cock! My life, am I in heaven...?? I've got two cocks in my ass and one in my pussy -- you must be pleased; this is what you've wanted to do for so long." I pause to gauge his reaction and see if I'm on the right track. Just imaging it, I've started to rub my clit. I'm wet so often and am almost insatiable.

"Hmm, good, but what else...?" Pleasing him was becoming more and more difficult.

"Another guy comes along and starts to fuck my mouth, he's going deep, so deep I nearly swallow him so I don't choke! And I can feel someone sucking my nipples. Oooh it feels good. But it's still not enough for you. You pull out, I've only got three cocks in me now. You're watching me get fucked by three strange men, stroking your still hard cock. A girl comes over and goes to her knees. She takes you in her mouth, but your eyes don't leave me, even as you're holding on to her ponytail and thrusting inside her."

"You know I'm not interested in fucking any other women." It's your default response, but I struggle to believe that I've given you a free pass and you'd not be interested. You protest too much.

"You push her away and come back me instructing all the others to stop. And then the girl comes back. You turn me onto my back and she sits on my face. Her pussy is wet as I suck her clit and you gently start to fuck me again, alternating between ass and pussy. She bends over and starts to lick my clit, brushing against your beautiful cock. You guide her hand inside me so that she's fisting me while you're fucking me."

I'm so fucking horny right now, I need some relief. I need to get off the phone and actually play with some of my toys.

"Aven I need to go. I need to fuck myself."

"Record it and send it to me. That is an order, you slutty, slave whore." I'm not sure if he means it when he says it, but it's true. I am. And I would do anything to please him.

I lube myself up and the beads just aren't what I'm after -- I want to try the double dildo. I want to feel a solid cock in my ass at the same time as in my pussy. I set up my phone to record and hope that it catches what I'm about to do.

It's so wet and slippery, it's hard to get any grip. The dildo goes straight in my pussy and it feels like home. I take the 7 inches easily. Getting it into my ass is another story. It feels tight. I'm scared I'm going to fail my master. I persevere. Use more lube. This dildo is going in my ass! I have to compromise. It's ass or pussy. I pull it out, I'm so wet. The sloppy noise it makes I know will have you stroking your hard cock.

I'm now slowly pushing the 8-inch dildo into my incredibly tight, lubed ass. It's a bit different to the beads! It feels uncomfortable to start with but I get past the point of my hole stretching and then I'm in. I take it all! I'm fucking my ass with an 8-inch dildo and it feels good. It's stuck to the floor in the bathroom using a suction pad, so I can bounce up and down to my hearts content. It feels uh-maz-ing! I need Aven here now. I actually need him to be doing this to me. I need him fucking my ass as he fists me and then opens my ass so it gapes at him, like a mouth in awe.

I send him the video. He's pleased. I'm pleased. But it's not enough. I need to feel both. But that will have to wait until another time, when I have the house to myself or steel some time and go to a hotel.

Aven is satisfied for the time being, but that won't last. He's told me I need to be ready for him when I return, that my ass and pussy will get such a pounding. He wants me gaping and he wants to stretch me. And God help me, I want him to.