All Comments on 'A Risky Dinner Ch. 01'

Great introduction!!! Looking forward to more of this story with great expectations!!!

Hope there is a part 2

The words and the story line from the women's perspective is very believable. I anxiously await your next chapter to see how this plays out.

Off to a great start. Nice buildup.

This is the biggest crock of nothing ever. There is no background between these people. Who are they toward each other? Relationship? She's being such a whore and he's being an idiot. The writer is writing on the surface, there is no story here.

Convoluted sentence structure and a recurring issue with placing commas they don't belong, or omitting them where they are needed mars an otherwise well-crafted teaser intro. Maybe get an editor before the next installment.

ended too abruptly. A great start but certainly needs more... Like reading her emotions.

your story is just as bad as your pictures on AM pics..

what an embarassment!

Thank you for your comments. I will try and clean up the comma situation in additional installments. ShadowRosie did I do something to upset you in a thread or something? Who the characters are to each other is pretty well defined on the first page. Thank you for hate reading/skimming I guess.

Friends to lovers can be a wonderful read, and this is off to a good start. More, please, and soon!

If this story will be delivered in chapters, I'd respectfully suggesting the chapters end and begin accordingly...this has potential, but the chapter ended like a typewriter ran out of ribbon.

I liked it. It is written so that we get her tentative feelings about what she is doing. They are good friends and she is planning to push their friendship into a relationship but doesn't want to scare him off. This is a different plot and I think I like where it is going. Don't rush it. You are good for another 4 or so short chapters, each progressing as they move toward culminating in a sizzling romance.

This is one of the shittiest stories I have ever read on Lit.

Don't bother writing anymore stories

zero stars!

CJ75

Keep on doing what you are doing, don't let the naysayers get under your skin. Continue writing your story and enjoy what you are creating. It looks as though, by way of the comments, that you have an audience that is looking forward to future chapters, as do I.

"your story is just as bad as your pictures on AM pics..

what an embarassment!"

Don't know what would possess you to make it personal here. I usually stop reading stories I'm not enjoying after a couple of paragraphs. Leaving a comment like this says a lot about you.

@ShadowRosie, you're a dick. Don't be a dick.

Need the next chapter

Great story and nice build up.. but am left wanting to read more. Looking forward to more submissions from you!

This is really good. You’ve established that they’re both interested, and both are being awkward. IMO the chapter could have continued to the next phase of the evening.

A nice start to the story. Good writing and story setup. Looking forward to the continuation of it.

Love the build up. Would love to see how it goes from here.

Great, got me hooked