A Room without a View

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A nervous wife tries her hand at dating again.
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The following story was written in two evenings. The first night I wrote the husband's sections and the second night the wife. I did one pass to ensure consistency between the transitions, but fair warning, there may be the occasional typo. The story is told linearly but from each of their perspectives and demarcated by their name in bold: Robert or Emma.

This is my first story so I'd love to hear feedback! That said, please keep any comments about the morality of the story or the characters to yourself. This is complete work of fiction. Thank you and I hope you enjoy!


Robert

It's funny, even the smallest event can change the course of your life. We had just returned from dinner and I slipped around a corner to check the mail in our apartment lobby. As I unlocked the box and sorted through the junk, I heard laughter from the around the corner. Curious, I made my way back and saw her. She looked different. Her smile was soft and playful, her eyes were wide and sparkling, and her head was tilted slightly to one side. She was flirting. Not with me, but with a stranger. He was a handsome man, with dark hair and a nice smile. He wore a suit that fit him well. He leaned just a bit in closer to her and said something she must of found amusing as she giggled and touched his arm. I felt a pang in my chest.

I watched them talk for another minute or so before this stranger stepped into the elevator. As the large elevator doors began closing, I slowly approached my wife Emma. She gracefully pirouetted back towards the center of the lobby and when our eyes met. Her giddy, floating expression turned to surprise and ended with a more neutral, almost concerned, smile.

We were standing in the elevator, side by side, watching the floor numbers climb when I finally asked "so who was that?"

"Who is what?"

"The man you were speaking to in the lobby."

At that moment, the elevator doors opened and my Emma quickly stepped into the hallway.

Over her shoulder she quickly replied "Oh. Um. I think his name is Mark."

As we entered our apartment I continued "So, how do you know Mark?"

"I don't really. We've just run into each other a couple times coming into the building and say 'hi' every now and then. Why do you ask?"

"You seemed very..." I paused for dramatic effect "... happy to see him. If I didn't know any better, I would have assumed you two were flirting."

In retrospect, I probably should have approached the issue with a bit more tact because that statement turned out to be the opening bell for the biggest fight we'd had in years. It was a multi-hour affair that ended with us both laying on the sofa, tired, punch-drunk, and apologizing profusely to each other.

That delirium, coupled with the special concoction of circumstance was the catalyst to a profound change in our relationship. It started innocently enough, by me continuing to apologize. "I'm sorry for accusing you of flirting, but honestly, even if you were, there's nothing wrong with finding someone else attractive. You're human."

She replied "I suppose, if I'm being honest, I do find him a bit attractive... in a dumb, way-too-young for me kind of way." She turned her head to me and continued "and the way he looked at me the first time we met. It felt... nice."

We continued to talk until morning. I'll spare the play-by-play but I can summarize her position as the following: she's happily married, loves me, but sometimes misses the excitement of dating. She "misses the butterflies", "not knowing what may come from an errand smile from across the room." Everything now is "wonderful, but a tad predictable."

Under any other circumstance, those words would have been a gut punch. Instead, that night, it had the opposite effect -- I had never felt closer to her and strong in our relationship.

Around sunrise, we both pulled out our phones and emailed our respective offices, notifying each that we were not feeling well and taking a sick day. After we brushed our teeth and climbed into bed, I told her my honest opinion: that she should "go out on a date with someone else."

Like a triggered mousetrap, she immediately sprung right up in bed and said "Have you lost your mind?"

"I don't think so."

"What do you mean by date?"

"I mean a date -- with someone not me. What's not to understand."

"So like..."

"I don't know... dinner, drinks, whatever."

"The 'whatever' part is what I want you to be explicit about."

"Are you asking me if 'third base is ok'? Yeah, whatever you would do if you were single."

She slowly laid back down and in an exhausted tone said "Ah, so you have indeed lost your god damned mind."

"Hey... you said you wanted unpredictability. You have a..." I trailed off briefly before finishing with "I think the term is 'hall pass.' It doesn't expire and no questions asked."

"Confirmed: you have lost your mind."

Maybe I did lose my mind, but I was sure that I was not only ok with this, but I thought it was a good idea. We talked about the prospect of her going on date almost every night for the next several weeks and even tried to push for a bit of role playing. Slowly, she stopped bring up the topic and I didn't press the issue so after a few months it all was distant memory.

Emma

I had been struggling with my husband Robert's suggestion for me to date other men. It was a fun thing to roleplay but even the thought of doing it in real life brought me a great deal of anxiety. We talked about it for a while, but eventually, my husband stopped mentioning it and I let the idea die. With how busy life can get, I didn't even think about it again until I was at the gym on a cold December morning.

I felt relaxed and refreshed after my yoga class and grabbed my towel and water bottle and headed to the locker room to collect my things.

As I walked by the weight area, I noticed a guy at the bench press who smiled at me. He had dark hair, blue eyes, and a muscular build. He was wearing a black tank top and gray shorts. I thought he was cute in a very traditional way, but I didn't give him a second thought after I passed.

I reached the locker room and opened my locker. I took out my backpack and stuffed my towel and water bottle inside. I checked my phone for any messages and then zipped up my bag. I slung it over my shoulder and headed back to the exit.

I passed by the weight area again and saw that the guy was still there. He had finished his set and was sitting on the bench, wiping his sweat with a towel. He looked up and saw me walking by. He smiled again and said, "Hey."

I stopped and looked at him. He had a friendly and confident expression on his face. He stood up and walked towards me. He extended his hand and said, "Hi, I'm Jake."

I hesitated for a moment, then shook his hand. I felt a spark of attraction as our skin touched. I said, "Hi, I'm Emma."

He nodded and said, "Nice to meet you, Emma. I've seen you around here a few times. You always look somehow so focused and determined while also appearing carefree. You have a smile on your face, all the time."

I became a bit self conscious of the fact I was smiling then and said, "Thanks. I like to challenge myself and I guess I'm just a happy person."

He said, "Me too. That's why I'm here. So, what do you do when you're not at the gym?"

I said, "I'm a graphic designer. I work for a small agency downtown."

He said, "That's cool. I'm a journalist. I work for a local newspaper."

I said, "Oh, really? Which one?"

He said, "It's called The Wonderland. We cover hyper local news, politics and a little entertainment. I personally cover most of the city counsel stuff"

I said, "I've read some of your articles. They're very well-written." That was a complete lie and I regretted it the moment it left my mouth.

He said, "Thank you. I appreciate that. It's not the kind of thing most people read too much about."

I nodded and said, "I don't know why not?" I felt even more embarrassed.

We continued to chat for a few minutes and I don't remember a moment of it. I knew we were flirting and I had the strong suspicion he was going to ask me out and I had an inner dialogue to decide what to do. I knew Robert said he wanted me to do go out on a date but that was months ago. What if he changes his mind? The hall pass doesn't expire, right? Before I could complete the debate in my mind, he asked.

"Look. I really like you. Do you want to go on a date sometime? There's a little cocktail bar down the street, assuming you live nearby."

I wasn't sure what to say so I started with "I do" and then paused before "live nearby i mean. But um... Jake, so I'm really flattered but I am not really looking for a boyfriend or anything."

"No biggie, so we keep it casual. That is fine by me."

"Ok casual sounds nice." I didn't know what I was saying until after it left my mouth. "When?" I continued.

"Friday. Give me your number and I'll text the details.

We exchanged numbers and I staggered out of the gym in a daze trying to figure out how to tell Robert.

Robert

It was two weeks before Christmas and we were snuggled on the sofa watching a movie. Her head was on my chest and she said something almost under her breath. I couldn't make it out so I turned off the television.

"Sorry, what did you say?" I asked.

She looked up at me with a nervous smile. "So...I may have a date."

I felt a jolt throughout my body. "A date? With who?"

She bit her lip. "If that's OK. I mean, you said it was OK that night."

I nodded slowly. "Yeah, I did. But who is it? The lobby, guy Mark? And when?"

She sighed. "Oh, Mark, not him" She shook her head "this is someone at the gym. His name is Jake. We started talking and he asked me out for drinks. This Friday night."

"Drinks? Where?"

"Just down the street. Nothing fancy."

I didn't know what to say so I just "Does he know you're in a relationship?"

She shrugged. "I don't know. He hasn't asked, I haven't mentioned it."

"But you're wearing a ring." I pointed at her finger.

She glanced at it and then at me. "I don't wear it at the gym."

I was speechless for a moment. Then I managed to say one word. "Great."

She looked hurt by my tone. "What? You're not happy?"

I corrected my face to place a smile. "Of course I am. It's just...unexpected."

She moved closer to me and kissed my cheek. "Don't worry, it's just a date. Nothing more."

I wrapped my arms around her and kissed her back. "I'm good with this with this, great even. I need you to know I think it could be really fun for both of us, OK?"

She nodded and smiled again. "OK."

We surprisedly only spoke about the date three more times before Friday rolled around. Most of those discussions were just providing reassurance that situation was indeed ok with me. The truth was that it wasn't just lip service, I was ok and even excited by this. To be clear, I was certainly anxious but I felt for some reason that this was a positive turn in our marriage.

That Friday, I sat in the living room as she came and went from the bedroom, modeling outfits for her date that evening. She looked stunning in every one of them, but she seemed unsatisfied. She tried on different colors, styles, and accessories, but none of them seemed to match her mood. Before I could even voice an opinion, she would would say something like 'I know, too boring' or 'too desperate' then march back into bedroom for another option. She wanted to impress him, but also not look like she was trying too hard. She wanted to feel attractive and desired, but also not rub it in my face. She was conflicted and honestly so was I. I wanted her to be happy, but also with me as the center of her world. I wanted her to explore, but also not forget me. I wanted her to love me, but also not anyone else. This was all a delicate balance.

Her final selection, happened to be her first. A simple but elegant pencil skirt and a frilly top that had just the right amount of cleavage. It was classy and sexy at the same time. It was perfect for her. That was a point that I decided not to mention and as she walked to our front door.

She was 10 minutes late at that point and before she opened it she turned to me with said "last chance."

I just said "I love you, now get out of here."

She looked shocked, like she just forgot something, then raised her left hand and wiggled her fingers. She pulled her wedding ring off and placed it in the key trey by the door.

"Whew! That was close. Ok I'm off and I love you too." And with that, she was gone.

One thing I didn't account for was what I would do while she was out. It was a odd experience where minutes felt like hours. I couldn't watch TV, read or even work. My imagination was in overdrive, trying to recreate scenarios of how things are going. It took every bit of restraint I had to not text her.

I turned on the dodger game for a distraction and during the bottom of the 6th inning I couldn't take it any more. I had to send Emma text: "How's everything going?"

I waited impatiently for her reply. My phone finally buzzed. She wrote: "Good."

That was it? Just good? I felt frustrated and curious. I threw my phone on the couch and then saw it light up again. She had just sent more messages.

Emma

The date went even better than I would have hoped. Jake was charming, charismatic and so passionate about what he does for living, it was infectious. I never gave a hoot about politics, much less local but during our talk I thought maybe I should start.

We'd been talking non-stop for hours and I found myself a bit self conscious with the little signals I was sending. Honestly, it wasn't an intentional thing but something I'd notice after the fact. For his part, throughout the evening he never really made a move, or at least one I picked up on. It wasn't until I was telling him a funny story about burning food in a soup kitchen where I was volunteering at that he just, out of the blue, asked. "Can I kiss you?"

I didn't verbally respond but slightly nodded my head and leaned forward. The kiss was electric. I could feel it everywhere throughout my body.

At that point, something completely came over me and I just asked "do you want to get out of here?"

It was at this point I heard the chirp of my phone through the cloth of my purse. I knew it was Robert.

We both looked at my purse before he answered "I would, but my place is probably off limits. My sister is visiting from Ohio."

I didn't know what to do so I pulled out my phone and saw Robert's text. "Do you mind if I respond really quickly?"

He laughed and just said "no problem!"

I quickly replied to Robert and put the phone in my purse again. "Sorry I'm going to go powder my nose really quick."

My stomach felt queasy as I thought about how I'm going to have to ask my husband to leave our apartment so I bring a man home.

Robert

I reached for my phone and read her text. "Sorry, I had to excuse myself and I'm in the bathroom now."

"It's okay" I wrote back. "So, do you like him?"

"He's nice. He works for the Wonderland. He's a good conversationalist."

"Are you still at the bar? It's getting late."

"Yes, we are. Listen, I need to ask you something..."

"What is it?"

"Would you mind if we...continued the date?"

"Do you mean leave together?"

"Yes, I do. But only if you're okay with it. You can say no."

I felt a surge of emotions. Jealousy, excitement, fear, love. I typed quickly: "Go ahead. Have fun" before I lost my nerve.

"Are you sure?"

"Yes, I'm sure. I love you."

"I love you too. There's one more thing... and it's somehow even more awkward than my last question..."

"What is it?"

"Well, he has his sister staying over at his place, so we don't have any privacy there. So..."

"You want to use our apartment? Sure, I can go to the common room and chill there."

"I'm so sorry to ask you this."

"Don't be sorry. It's fine. I'll be out of here before you get back."

I had grabbed my dodger hat and my keys and walked toward the door when I received another message.

"OMG. I just realized he thinks I'm single. Can you maybe put stuff away to make it seem like I live along. I feel absolutely terrible, asking!"

"On it."

"Ok do what you can in fifteen minutes. Probably not a big deal."

I felt a surge of panic. I looked around the apartment and saw my things everywhere. My clothes were on the dining table where I had jus been folding them, shoes by the door, books, laptop, guitar and other belongings seemed every place I looked. I tried to take inventory of what is obviously a man's versus not.

I went into the bedroom and opened two suitcases and started stuffing my things into each. I left guitar and laptop where they were, but the clothes and shoes I packed. Then saw all the pictures of us on the wall. I carefully took each off and placed it in the dishwasher as there was nowhere else to safely store them.

I looked around and nothing looked too suspicious. I grabbed both suitcases and slid them under the bed and left with 5 minutes to spare.

It wasn't until I reached common room that I realized I completely missed the bathroom. Would they go there? I had no idea but didn't want to risk it. All of my things were on the counter and medicine cabinet and most were gender obvious. I darted back to the apartment and found an old backpack to throw them all in and tossed it under the bed beside the two suitcases.

As I walked to the door I froze. I could hear my wife's laugh from out in the hall. I was completely trapped. I worked my way back to the bedroom and looked at the window. The fire escape seemed like an option but didn't think I could maneuver it. I could hear the key in our front door so I closed the bedroom door, flipped the bedroom lights and tip toed into the closet.

I made a terrible racket from bumping into hangers and such. I needed to arrange myself and other items in there so I could sit quietly. Finally, when I was comfortable, or as comfortable as I could be, I started to slide the closet door behind me leaving a bit of open space so the the doors wouldn't make a noise when they closed together. Even with the sliding door cracked a few inches, it took a while for my eyes to adjust to the light.

Emma

We held hands on the walk back to the apartment. The heels I wore were helpful in walking at a slow enough pace that I hoped gave Robert time to get the apartment in order. I wasn't too worried about miscellaneous things left as long as the obvious stuff was gone. To make things even easier, I also planned to stay out of the bedroom and our bathroom. That just felt wrong to me and that's mostly where his belongings were.

As we waited for the elevator, I tried to figure how much time had passed. I didn't want to pull out my phone but I figured we were close to the fifteen minute estimate I gave Robert. We stepped into the elevator, along with a neighbor who lived a few floors below. After they got out, and it was just me and Jake, I turned to him and leaned into kiss him. The doors opened and I pulled him by the and into the hallway. I prayed that Robert was out already but it was too late at this point. I already had a white lie in my mind to explain his presence, if worst came to worst.

As we slowly walked down the hall I said that I was "this is a bit embarrassing but my room is a mess so we can hang out in the living room."

"That surprises me." He said.

"What does?"

"The fact you'd have a messy room."

The truth was he was right. I never had a messy room. Even as a little girl I'd make my bed every morning and put way everything before going to bed at night.

"You might find that I'm full of surprises." I replied with a laugh.

We slowly walked the distance of the hall and stood in front of our apartment door.

12