All Comments on 'A Son Forced Pt. 01'

Not a bad start. Here's hoping the son will turn the tables...

The story is fantastic, but mabey you should re read over the story before you publish it. Make sure all the grammar is correct and all the spelling is correct too.

Other than that, I like it!

Really great start! Please don't ruin it by making him give in too soon, hell even don't make him give in.

Have him use his knowledge as a fantasy writer to turn he tables on them and have his mom and sister as his slaves!

Take you time.

There is so much to do in the next chapter, looking forward to the next one.

Thank you for this, there is a lack of these type of stories and I hope you will continue writing them. Great job!

Seriously...find an editor. Your (not you're) punctuation and grammer are very poor, which detracts greatly from a very good story line and some great imagery.

I am not a big aficionado of domination, humiliation, and submission, except in certain instances. However in this story, I am liking the idea that Jason is fighting his dominating mother on this.

He is so disappointed in his cock responding to her sexually forcing him, when he needs to use this to his advantage. He needs to enjoy the act and let the cunt know that he is enjoying it. The catch is that he needs to fantasize about someone else and call out their name as he orgasms or is getting excited. His agent seems to have caught his eye earlier, so she could be used to torment his raping mother. How eager will she be, if she or her slut daughter give him pleasure, and then he makes them think he is thinking about someone else that they have no control over.

Just a thought soul71.

Now, a comment on your writing skills. I will never insult you for your English, grammer, and punctuation skills. For one thing, I have not posted a story yet my self, like some of your VERY RUDE commenters, and I salute you for your effort. If they feel your writing is so bad and makes reading your story so difficult, maybe they should just move their pompous, self-agrandizing selves on down the road. Especially the cowards that are ANONYMOUS!

However, that doesn't mean that you couldn't improve your stories by using an editor of some kind. There are folks here on Literotica that will volunteer to edit stories. Since I have never used one, I can't speak for their effectiveness, or what they "charge" for their services. I would expect to give an editing credit to them at the beginning of the story, at the very least, and depending on how far they go in editing, possibly including them as a co-author.

Keep writing, as I said, I am enjoying this story!

Hello everyone thanks for reading my story. Part two will be out soon or as soon as I can find an editor that answers their email. Just to give y'all a head's up.

a good story and I too am enjoying him resisting her. I do hope he is able to turn the table on them all. There are errors in word usage, multiple editors will help with this problem since I've seen even using an editor usually means there's still errors since our mind fill in the errors. I have written and do write stories, so I'm just giving you some helpful advice.

Yea I'm working on it but editors are a pain to get a hold of it's the reason part two isn't out yet.

Are two different things.

I am a little late to the party, so my opinion at this point doesn't mean much, but as I read future I can see that Jason (at least at this point) is a lost cause. I think it would have been a much hotter story if He can completely turn the tables on his mother.

That being said, I did enjoy this chapter and looking forward to reading the others

A good story so far

Switching between first and third person can be a bit disconcerting, especially in the middle of a paragraph

Yeah it's getting fixed.

Another writer that doesn't know the diference between "to" and "too".

Yeah, and your point is? The story is over a damn year old where have you been?

Funny

Alright... funny wasn't what I was going for, but glad you got some enjoyment Desired.

Not necessarily a GOOD editor, mind you

Just a run-of-the-mill editor would do wonders for readability

Where have we been? Reading OTHER authors, most of who actually know how to

use the English Language. Your story itself is interesting,but the execution sucks

Until Lit recently suggested this story as a "you might also like" link, I'd never heard of you

I'll offer to edit for you, if you'll unbend far enough to accept

Remind me, who you are again?

Just one of SEVERAL who have either suggested or flat out t told you that you need an editor

You seem to be hung upon the fact that none of us have ever published anything here on LIT

But I guarantee you I’ve written a bunch If I had ever turned in anything written like this in Jr High, Senior High or English Comp I’d have gotten a failing grade

And if I ever wrote like this in my processional capacity, I’d have been standing tall in front of my boss, listening to him/her tell me exactly why I would never, EVER , embarrass them like that again

My offer was in response to your comment that your couldn’t get a hold of any of the Lit volunteer editors I think what probably happened was that you DID, and responded to them the way that you responded here, and they said “I don’t need this shit” and stopped responding to you

I’ll probably go ahead and finish this story simply to see how you work things out, but I probably wont fight your writing to read anything else of yours

I know that is gonna break your heart, right?

Not one bit. But do go or stay matters little to me what you do, John.

Just letting you all know an updated version has been uploaded and should appear in a couple of days.

I'm running out of adjectives to describe your stories. I can tell this is going to be another rollercoaster ride. With all of his money couldn't he have left home already? If course then there would be a story. I can't wait to start the next part.

I love the original idea. This has me wanting to read more and more after every sentence. Of course I see people complaining on the grammar. I personally have the intelligence to be able to read through it without a problem. but it seems to others that it ruins the story because you mistyped one of who knows how many words in the chapter. Keep up the good work

I like the premise of the story. I’m interested to see where you take it. I don’t normally say this, but I’m having a hard time reading this story with all the spelling and grammar problems. I’m not complaining, it’s just a little hard to read for me.

So he was disgusted by their behavior during three years, but in a few hours he becomes aroused by it?

So the boy has known for a long time that his mom is a Mistress and her dad and sister slaves, and in the restaurant he doesn't see that she will try to make him her slave?

So he's so naïve that he can't see that his sister is acting on his mom's instructions, or to believe that his mom won't try to break him in order to have access to his money?

He is already of age and has money. Nobody is preventing him from simply leaving them at the house and drive to a hotel to wait out the five months before leaving forever.

Help is one 911-call away.

The last part simply contradicts everything we're told in the first part about the boy's character. Sorry but suspension of disbelief is too much here.

I enjoy this concept and I see how you're trying to develop it. There was a few problems with switching between First and Third person narration but it was still readable. I intend to finish the series, so thanks for writing!

So he gets his older used up whore of a mother and his sister that his old ass father has been fucking. Wow if I was Jason and felt as he did I would have told Mara to go fuck herself and then sis that I wouldn't touch a disgusting slut like her when I saw old dad fingering her in the car. Sorry but knowing that Jack has been fucking sis for three years turns me off to her character and moms a psycho bitch and they only are interested in his money and mom wants the challenge of breaking him. Sorry but your main female characters are written to be disposable and quickly forgotten. I hope you bring in a better female lead for jason or he will just be left with sloppy seconds he will have to share with his old dad.

I normally love your work I only made it to the ride home from the restaurant. I was pulling my hair out that he agreed to take them. If he's 18 and a millionaire why does he have to live at home at all??? I know it's for the story and all that, I get it. But come on!! I should have known better. I had an idea going in that this would involve manipulation and coercion which are big turn offs for me, but I love your work so I had to try.

The incongruity in this character is annoying he is a genius who's been reading and then writing successfully and has grown his wealth and power in high school for several years under his families nose, they are neglectful and his fathers is emotionally abusive, he hates them and knows about their lifestyle, but right after he reveals who he is and his money he doesn't realize, and didn't expect his sister and mother to try and control him?! Why doesn't such a brilliant yet discreet individual get caught off guard when the incestuos gold diggers start making moves directly after hearing about all his success!?!?!?

There’s one thing that makes none of it work: Jason doesn’t need to graduate to move out. He has the money to support himself, and is of age to sign contracts. A person as bright as he is, would have had his bags packed and be out the door, upon signing his contract.

It’s a nice premise but the logic as to why Jason is still living at home makes no sense lmao

I am severely confused by the character of Jason, as a millionaire author over the age of eighteen, who is aware of the lifestyle of his parents and sibling, why the hell would he remain in his parents house.

He has money

But doesn't leave

Yeah the logic there is absolutel dog shit

Nothing in this story makes sense

MC sounds like a pussy

Oh may! What hot story. Love how Jason is dealing with his family. I don't think I'd be able to do that. I'd have my throbbing cock so in my sister's holes. I'd love to see him turn into Dom and turn his into his slave.

Forget what the haters say. It's your story tell it the way you want. You don't need to explain the characters thoughts and reasons to anyone. Plus if they think they can do better let them. Keep posting. Looking forward to reading more of your work.