A Year of Denial

A Year of Erotic Frustration

I'm sitting astride Dicun, his desperate, twitching cock cradled between my labia as I slide slowly back and forth, teasing my clit on that lovely soft hotspot just below his cock head. He's gripping my buttocks, squeezing the soft flesh, his lips tormenting my swollen nipple, his moans inflaming my lust.

'Hold on baby,' I gasp. 'Almost there.'

He thrusts his buttocks clear off the bed forcing his cock against my clit. I cry out as the orgasm crashes through my body. Wave upon ecstatic wave, courses though me, but he's not finished yet.

'Now! In you,' he pants frantically.

I lift up a little and point his rigid cock into my soaking cunt. I grind my clit against his pubis, careful not to pump up and down, for that would set him off. His rigid cock fills me deliciously. I squeeze my cunt walls around it. For a moment, I long to pump, to feel him explode, to moan with pleasure, to fill me with his essence. But no' that is not our way. I slide back and forth slowly, his cock pressing against my cunt walls, my clit dragging across his pubic mound. I watch his desperate face as the orgasm wells up in me. I scream as it crashes through me. I collapse on him, chest to chest, I feel the furious beating of our hearts, our panting breaths as my body relaxes completely against his and strangely his cock softens, the tension in his body melting away too. I love this man. Just as our bodies are entwined, so my heart and my soul are entwined with his.

'Well done you amazing stud,' I say. 'Are you OK?'

He laughs. 'Well my balls ache like you wouldn't believe. Situation normal. It will pass in a little while.'

'Exactly a year since your last orgasm. Quite an achievement. This was a wonderful way to celebrate. Thank you for the fabulous love making.'

'Thank you for sharing your orgasms with me, you delicious sexpot,' he laughs. 'Now how about that celebration champagne and cheese tray waiting for us in the fridge?'

I scoured the coffee shop looking for Melanie, my oldest and most trusted friend. We had known each other since kindergarten and although we got together with our husbands regularly, we liked to meet once a week for some girl time. I spotted her sitting in a quiet corner with a couple of coffees and some Danish. We hugged and sat down to enjoy each other's company. After catching up on family gossip, Mel leaned forward shyly.

'Leah. Could I talk to you about something a bit personal?'

'Of course,' I replied. 'What's up?'

'Well actually it's what's not up that's the problem. Jim is having trouble staying hard enough for intercourse and it's really got him down. He's shying away from me in bed, and I can see he's really unhappy. I've tried to reassure him that his tongue satisfies me, but it's difficult to get him over even with a just hand job. Sex has always been a pretty important part of our relationship.' Mel bit her lip. 'This is embarrassing. I hope it's not too much to be sharing.'

'Don't be silly. Mel. I'm so sorry that you're both going through a rough time. We're all well past our prime and problems like this aren't exactly unusual. Sex is pretty important to Dicun and me too and we've had age related problems. It might help to share how we've handled things, but I need Dicun's permission before I do that. In the meantime, has Jim seen a doctor? I'm sure you know there are several medications that can help with erectile dysfunction, but he should make sure there aren't other health factors causing the problem.'

'You know Jim. He can be very obstinate when it come to doctors, and I suppose this is an embarrassing thing to have to raise with an outsider.'

'I think you need to work on him Mel. Use those persuasive powers to get him checked out. Reassure him that there's nothing unusual or embarrassing about E.D. at our age. We're long retired after all.'

I could see that Mel was uncomfortable, so I thought it best to change the subject and we moved on to chat about happier things.

That night, I cornered Dicun with a glass of his favourite beer and told him I needed to talk. Like any husband who hears those words, he got that deer-caught-in-the headlights look until I reassured him that it wasn't directly about us. We'd been good friends with Mel and Joe for so long and Dicun and Joe enjoyed each others company greatly, camping and fishing together whenever they could both get away so I expected my husband would be sympathetic. I described what Mel had told me and asked if I could share some of how we had handled the same problem. Dicun sat back with a thoughtful expression on his face and pondered my revelation.

'There are some serious risks here Leah! Sharing our kinky lifestyle is certainly going to change our relationship with Mel and Jim. They view us a good friends and they probably have an image of us as a couple that they're comfortable with. You're going to turn that upside down and who knows how they'll react. We could easily destroy a relationship that's very valuable to us.'

'Yeah, I hadn't though of it that way. But Mel is really worried about their relationship and Jim is obviously very unhappy.'

'Let's wait a bit and see whether she can get Jim to the doctor. Once he's on ED medication, the problem may be solved, and we won't have jeopardized our friendship with them. If she can't persuade him, we'll reconsider.'

'Well let's head to bed. You can read me a sexy story while I soothe your lovely cock.'

We stripped and settled ourselves comfortably in bed. I snuggled up to Dicun, my head on his shoulder and my leg over his thigh. While he read me a short story, I fondled his swollen balls and massaged his perineum. Once the story was done, I lubed up his cock and set to work stiffening him up. For the first five minutes or so, Dicun was fairly relaxed, stroking my shoulders, my head and belly' whatever he could reach. As he began to tense up, he settled on my breasts, fondling them, and teasing my nipples. Soon I felt the muscles in his thighs tightening and his breathing became irregular as he held his breath between soft moans of pleasure and frustration.

'Bottom of the shaft,' he murmured as he struggled to control his arousal.

I moved my hand lower and slowed the motion until he regained control. As his breathing steadied, I moved back to the crown and brought him back up to edge repeatedly, only pausing when he desperately panted 'Stop!'

After a quarter hour or so, my clit was so swollen and twitchy, I needed some urgent attention. I rolled on my back, legs apart and Dicun quickly took the hint. Crouching over me, he gently laved my labia with his tongue, slowly working his way deeper towards my vagina. My arousal level soared as I grasped his swollen balls and felt the desperate pulsing in the root of his cock. I came intensely, my thighs closing hard around his head. Gasping, I released him, and he immediately thrust two fingers into my vagina stroking my G-spot. He allowed me a few moments of sensual relaxation before setting his talented tongue to work on my clit. Pulling back the clitoral hood, he blew lightly on the swollen bud sending shivers through me. He began circling it, alternating with long strokes and gentle sucking. Every time my body tensed up preparatory to a glorious finish, my wicked husband backed off, blowing lightly on my desperately, needy clit.

'Stop that. Finish me off now,' I growled.

He laughed. 'A few minutes teasing will do you good. It's been a whole year for me. This'll give you just a taste of what that feels like!'

I squirmed, begged and grovelled for what seemed like forever until Dicun finally settled into steady long strokes with his tongue which brought me crashing into an incredibly powerful climax that left me limp as a rag doll. I barely had strength to roll over and rest my head on his shoulder as he drew me to him for that blissful post-orgasm cuddle that presaged sleep.

The following week, Mel and I got together for our usual coffee.

'So tell me Mel, where you able to get Jim to make an appointment with the doctor?'

Mel appeared to study the tabletop and said nothing. I reached out for her hand and stroked it gently.

'I take it the conversation didn't go well?'

Mel looked up at me gloomily. 'It did not go well. Jim mansplained to me that we've reached an age when this sex stuff shouldn't matter anymore. He's too old for it and he's certainly not going to embarrass himself by seeing a doctor. It's just a natural part of aging and we need to move on. I talked about how our sex life had always reinforced the emotional connection between us and that certainly we have to make accommodations for our age, but that intimate touch, holding, petting, playing were very important to me and I believed for him too. Things got quite testy after that and now I'm getting the cold shoulder.'

'Oh Mel. I'm so sorry. Men can be so obstinate and just plain stupid when their egos are involved. He's probably hurting a lot, feeling less of a man because he can't get it up?'

'Oh, there's no doubt he's very unhappy and probably feeling humiliated, but he's pulling away from me rather than sharing with me. In the past we've always worked on our problems together, but not this time. I feel so helpless.'

'So Mel, do you think your marriage with Jim could work if you let go of the physical and focus on cultivating closeness verbally, sharing activities together, creating opportunities to have fun, enhancing the kind of things you've always done together to nourish the bond between you?'

'This ED thing, the deterioration in our intimate life has been going on for quite a while and truthfully, it has really affected our relationship. The joy, the kindness, the caring attitude that I always loved in Jim seems to have been overtaken with a kind of bitterness, a gloominess that's really depressing. Could I do without physical intimacy? Maybe. But the Jim I know and love obviously can't and it's changing him.'

'Tell you what. Dinner, our place next Sunday. If I can persuade Dicun, we'll share how we dealt with a similar problem. Dicun thinks it's risky because you might both be put off by our kinky sex life, but the fact is that we do have a sex life and a very active one too. We don't want to lose you as friends but we're very fond of you both and if you can be open-minded, you just might be able to rekindle you sex lives. If Dicun vetoes it, then we'll just have a nice dinner together.'

'Well. That does sound intriguing. I'm hard to shock but Jim is a bit staid. Still, at this point I think it's well worth the risk!'

I was putting the final touch, capers, on the smoked salmon hors d'oeuvres when the doorbell rang. I nodded at Dicun, who went to answer it. I heard the familiar greetings as my husband led our guests out onto our deck and I carried the food and a bottle of champagne out to them. We eased into a pleasant conversation catching up on each other's lives while, as planned, Dicun kept our guests flutes well filled. Mel was soon quite giggly and even Jim loosened up. I called everyone into dinner, beef and artichoke stew with baked rice balls and a hearty Bordeaux to wash it down. Dicun and I, gradually brought the conversation around to how rare it was, these days, to be married for so many decades to the same person and that we four were quite unusual and special. Toasts were raised to our achievement.

'So', Dicun asked Jim, 'what do you think has kept you two together all these years?'

'Mel is an amazing wife, so patient, so giving, so caring. I just can't imagine life without her.' Jim was definitely tearing up, his vulnerability aided by the alcohol, his bitterness temporarily forgotten.

'And you Mel,' I asked. 'What's the magic glue that binds you to Jim?'

Mel frowned, silent for a moment as she put her thoughts together. 'Jim has always been there for me. Always supported my goals. He's someone I can trust completely, confide in and know I'll have his support. Also, I just love snuggling up to him. Being skin on skin with him makes me feel secure and loved.'

Jim looked a little uncomfortable at this last statement. Dicun and I glanced at each other, and he nodded to me.

'I think you mentioned a lot of the things that have kept Dicun and me together all these years,' I began. 'But for the two of us, I'd have to say that sex is a very important glue also. We went though a bad patch a few years ago when Dicun was having a problem with erectile dysfunction, and he started pulling away from me. He took a lot of convincing that much as I loved intercourse, there were lots of other ways we could enjoy intimacy.'

Jim's no fool and he was looking pretty wary by now. Dicun hastily refilled his glass and took up the narrative.

'I think it would be fair to say that I was in a bit of a depression. A very active, almost daily, sex life was one of the defining elements of our relationship. It nourished the incredible emotional connection between us and smoothed out the rough edges. The harder it was for me to manage intercourse, the more stressful the act became, which in turn made the E.D. worse. We on a downward spiral. The fun went out of our sex life. Leah could see what was happening, so one night we sat down and had a good talk.'

'We got ourselves comfortable on the sofa and had a real heart to heart. Dicun explained how stressful our sex life had become because he had to struggle to maintain an erection and as soon as intercourse started, he'd feel his cock deflating leaving him feeling so disappointed and inadequate. We agreed to try setting Dicun's erections and orgasms aside for a while; to just relax and enjoy mutual touch and cuddling every day. Dicun insisted on oral orgasms for me as often as I wanted.'

'Leah's orgasms became even more important to me as a way to finish up our sex play and to give us both a sense of resolution,' Dicun added. 'Over time, we found I could get aroused and really enjoy Leah playing with my cock and balls. Sometimes I would even get hard, but the problem was that if Leah went ahead and finished me off, it would take days or even a week or two before I could get nicely aroused again. It seemed like I couldn't have both orgasms and erections. Over time though, I started missing orgasms less and I began to really enjoy the constant feeling of arousal.'

Jim turned to Dicun looking quite shocked. 'How could you cope with the frustration? How can it be worth all the aggravation, the aching balls, the inability to finish. It seems to me that you're just making life miserable for yourself.'

Dicun grinned ruefully. 'You're right of course Jim. It is difficult but it actually worked out really well for me. At last I was able to make love to my wife properly some of the time. When I did, I felt so relieved, so good about functioning as a male and bringing both Leah and I the pleasure and connectedness that I felt we had lost. But there was a bigger change taking place in my own attitude. Once I knew I could reach the destination, albeit more rarely than I would have liked, I began to really appreciate the journey itself. I found enormous pleasure in sex play with Leah, the touching, the stroking, the cuddling, the incredible pleasure of surfing the edge of orgasm for minutes at a time without passing the point of no return and then finding closure by helping Leah through multiple orgasms. The blue balls soon pass and yes, I am a little distracted by being constantly horny, but I can focus when I need too. Being horny at our age is really energising. Colours seem brighter, smells more intoxicating, sounds more exciting and women' women, especially Leah, so much more alluring. I love that feeling' it's almost like being a teenager again.'

I jumped in. 'Eventually we settled into a routine. Every morning and night I'd massage Dicun's balls and penis for 15 minutes or so. He was to relax and enjoy the sensations and the closeness, but he wasn't to struggle to get erect and certainly shouldn't expect to cum. In return, he'd give me some nice oral orgasms when I felt like it. We soon had his cock hardening up quite nicely and he was really starting to enjoy the sensations of what we later learned was called edging or surfing. Sometimes he'd beg to finish him, but I always encouraged him to wait a few days longer when we'd be able to manage honest to goodness intercourse with orgasms for us both. We were elated and soon settled into a routine where in addition to the twice daily edging sessions, we had oral sex when I was in the mood and intercourse with orgasms for me when Dicun could manage it. As we lengthened the intervals between Dicun's orgasms, he was able to manage it more often.'

Jim looked unconvinced, but Mel raised her hand, almost as if she was back in school, to catch my attention. 'If Dicun is horny all the time, doesn't that put a strain on you? How do you manage his horniness?'

I chuckled. 'Well. Two things really. Before we started this, we'd gone through a dry spell with very little closeness because Dicun was pulling away from me. I was delighted at the change, but it did become wearing after a while and we had to discuss rules for behaviours outside of scheduled intimacy time. I didn't want to discourage it, but I needed to be able to say 'Not now' without hurting Dicun's feelings or discouraging him from trying again at a better time. It took a while and we still have misunderstandings now and again, but we sort them out. The second factor was that edging Dicun twice a day made me so horny that I was eager for oral sex most days and that took the pressure off. Dicun knew that if he was considerate, he'd probably be giving me orgasms which he loves to do, and that meant he was unlikely to spoil things by being a pest during the day.'

Mel looked puzzled. 'Dicun. Don't you resent all these orgasms that Leah is having when you're left hanging most of the time?'

'Not at all. I get a great sense of satisfaction from contributing to Leah's orgasms and even a sense of sexual relief or completion from them. Of course, that doesn't mean there aren't times when I'm absolutely desperate for an orgasm, but that's part of the fun too. I think it's important to add that tease and denial only went so far in helping with erections. As I've grown older, I have eventually had to resort to ED medication but even when erections don't happen, we've developed so many other ways to communicate sexually and to bond emotionally. Actually, I haven't had an orgasm in a year!'

Jim and Mel both looked astonished. Jim recovered first. 'It certainly sounds as though Leah's got you by the balls in the bedroom. Do you get any say at all what happens in bed? What if you decided you wanted to quit this denial stuff?'

Dicun nodded to me to answer. 'I'd try to talk him out of it because Dicun's orgasm denial works so well for our relationship. It keeps the spark of lust alive, keeps us emotionally close and excited about each other. I might ask him to hold out for a week and we'd talk about it, but if, after that time, he still wanted to quit, then we'd move on with a more conventional sex life. I'd be very disappointed though, but we love each other, and the security of our marriage doesn't depend on tease and denial. That being said, I have to admit that teasing Dicun to the edge over and over and leaving him hanging, twitching, moaning desperately is a real turn-on for this perverted old girl so Dicun gets what every man longs for - a wife who's turned on by his cock.'

'How do you know he's not masturbating behind your back?' Mel asked.

'We've been married more than 50 years. There's a lot of trust built up over that time. Besides, if he was masturbating to orgasm, I'd be able to tell when I was edging him. The lust for me that he exhibits every day just wouldn't be there. Actually, it wouldn't bother me if he was masturbating, as long as he didn't cum. It would just add to his horniness and his desperate need for my touch!'