All Comments on 'Abandoned with the Enemy Ch. 03'

I like the work you are putting into the story. A lot of writers go for the sex real fast in their stories. They don't use a lot of foreplay or sensual things happening and that gets old after a time. But you are doing a truly great job building up the story without even needing to have the sex in it yet. Truly a great story and I look forward to the next chapter. Also keep up the great work and when you finish writing this I will add it to my favorites note book.

Love the gradual build up and teasers makes me wanna sit here and wait for the next one :D

I like to see romantic build-up in a story and see how it ends up, even though in most cases it's obvious from the start. It's the teasing and frustratingly dragging it out which makes it so much fun. Ain't I a dick? :-p

If there's sex very quick at the beginning there has to be a reason for it and be part of the plot, like I did with Three Plump Pigs and Graduation Party. In those two cases there's not much to say at the start but more afterwards to flesh out the romance.

I've already got the story up on Amazon and Smashwords and I'll post the (unfortunately) last part here soon. Fortunately, I've tentatively started taking notes on a follow up involving at least two more of the stories here, which will be probably even worse on the amount of pages between the sex.

I love the pacing you've chosen for this story and really hope the follow ups you've mentioned involve these same characters. Maybe one of the faction's military shows up and they have to find a way to avoid/fight them? Maybe the situation gets complicated by another survivor? I'm really excited to see what happens - I almost don't care about the sex anymore :P

Almost not caring about no sex on this site? Then I must have written a real damned good story. :-D

Thanks!

I agree about everything this story is going. I do wonder when the main characters finally commit to their love for each other. Plus, the cag, Wendy, Rafe is curious of how Wendy understands him and Tashee & Naylee. Is Wendy psychic or has she developed a strong bond with them? How many more of Abandoned with the Enemy is there?

5 more *! And you have written a real damned good story! : )

Good story , love it. AAAAA++++

Who the hell doesn’t realize that they’re sporting’ wood? That’s twice now he’s stood in front of the women lewdly showing his pitched tent and then saying “whoops, I didn’t mean that.” Give me a break.

I appreciate the effort, but it’s amateur writing in my opinion with a lot of convenient occurrences. Ripperfish and Snekguy do an excellent job of this type of writing and also do appropriate research for the setting. They both (especially Snekguy) have a good grasp of military terminology and methods. Check out their stories and then see if you could polish up your writing. This is some of your early stuff, so I’ll check out some of your later writing next.