All Comments on 'Action Jackson Ch. 01'

Story context sucks very hard to follow

Alright, I know this short chapter may be a little rough because I wanted a little bit of feedback before continuing, so I'd be happy to receive a private message detailing contextual points you feel may need work. Thanks.

10" cock? HH tits? How middle-school.

This story is absolutely predicated on a complete lack of subtlety, which is what I like given the importance of spectacular rough sex to this storyline (I had wanted this story to go in the BDSM category). I fully admit that this is utterly juvenile fantasy, but that's what I bring to the table.

more chapters please